Baby Daddy

Okay, the wedding prep is finally done.

In 48 hours, I will be married to Brad.

I have to say, Mrs. Wheeler,

your relationship with Brad

makes me believe in miracles.

I'm going to ignore that...

Because I am going to want to borrow that blouse someday.

All right, now where's Ben?

I still need to go over my vows.

Are you really sure you want Ben to officiate?

Since we got back from Vegas,

he only speaks in grunts, snarls,

and some pretty rude hand gestures.

We kind of got in a fight.

So make up. How bad could it be?

Oh, good. All the liars and backstabbers are here.

So, by a show of hands,

who knew that Danny was in love with Riley,

that Riley was in love with Danny,

and that I've been making a complete fool of myself for the last year?

Mother?

People tell me lots of stuff.

That's what I thought.

Tucker?

See, what had happened was,

awesome! Awesome! Yeah!

So you all knew. That's great.

Okay, which means I'm never speaking to you,

you, or you ever again.

And I'm taking this. Thank you.

Ben.

I can't believe you told him on a weekend

that's supposed to be all about me.

You're so selfish!

- Okay, Ben, just listen... - Sorry, mom.

Don't waste your time.

There's nothing you can say that'll make me feel better.

Mm-hmm. How about... "Get over your damn self"?

Feel free to try a little harder.

Honey, it's not your brother's fault

that you and Riley aren't together.

He was 100% behind your relationship with her

despite the fact that he's been

in love with that girl his entire life.

And now that Riley, after all these years,

might actually have some feelings for him,

he should be running into her arms,

but he's not because of you.

But he lied to my...

Okay, do not cut your mom off when she's on a roll.

We don't get to decide who Riley,

or anyone else for that matter, loves.

Because if we could, I would be Mrs. jon Bon Jovi,

and you would be Benjamin Bon Jovi Bon Jovi!

Anything else?

Yeah. If you screw up my wedding,

we will both regret the day you were born.

Now I hope this helped, and I love you very much.

Come here.

If you could talk, you would have told me, right?

High five? Yeah?

Pound it. (Gibberish)

Oh my God! This is a disaster!

How can a wedding planner quit the day before the wedding?

You realize that's your fifth piece of toast, right?

It's called stress eating, Bonnie,

and you are making me very stressed!

Well, take a breather.

Nobody wants to marry a chunker, honey.

Maybe it's a sign. Do you think it's a sign?

Yes, I think it's a sign

that I cannot control myself around carbs.

I begged you not to keep bread in the house.

- Knock, knock. - Where have you been?

I know you said it was a matter of life and death,

but, I mean, I figured you'd be dead

by the time I got here anyway, so...

I mean, why not stop for coffee?

Our wedding planner just quit.

All of our plans just up in smoke, literally.

Apparently, she went crazy and burned her offices to the ground.

Oh my God, that's horrible.

I got my good suit cleaned for nothing.

Tucker, please, you have to produce our wedding.

I saw that wedding special you did last week

- on the Mary hart show. - Oh my God, you did?

- No, not really. - (Knock on door)

- Charlotte! - Bonnie!

Oh my gosh! Get in here!

What are you doing here?

Oh, my gosh, I came running over here

the second I heard that that wedding planner

that I recommended left you high and dry.

I really thought prison would have changed her.

Well, no worries.

No, I am just glad that you are here to help.

All right, Charlotte.

- Yeah. - This is my fiance.

Wow. I knew you liked 'em young,

but do you have to pack this one a lunch for school?

No, not this one. Tucker,

this one. This is Brad.

Oh, wow. He's an upgrade.

Hello.

Hi.

So, Brad, Charlotte and I met at the hospital

when we both went into labor,

and we've just been besties ever since.

She's always been the Thelma to my Louise.

You know they died driving off a cliff, right?

Yes, right after they shot a man who crossed them.

Okay, let's get to work! We got a wedding to plan!

Yes, we do!

Oh! Hey, can I talk to you for a second?

Uh, this is hard, so please don't stop me.

I'd be lying if I said I still didn't have feelings for you, but...

Oh, Ben, we can't do this.

Remember the part where I said, "don't stop me"?

Anyway, about us,

I just want you to know that I've moved on.

Yeah. Everything is good.

And I know that you're in love with Danny

and that Danny's in love with you,

- Ben... - Still talking. Still talking.

Even though this information would have been

super helpful a couple of months ago,

I just want you to know that everything is good.

Yeah, I'm, I'm great.

Well, I'm, I'm good.

Actually, I'm just fine.

So if you two don't end up together,

then that's all totally on you guys,

not me.

Now you may speak.

All right. I don't know what to say.

I can't believe you're being so amazing.

Neither can I.

I'm super happy we're done talking about this.

I just don't ever think there will be a Danny and me.

And we're still talking about this. Okay.

Um, just tell him how you feel.

Okay, see you later.

No, I did, I did,

and he completely freaked out on me,

so I'm not gonna put myself out there like that again.

I can't do it.

Everyone loses.

Cool. I'm good with that.

Oh, hey, Ben, I'm really sorry, man.

I didn't mean to hurt you.

And you have to believe me, there's nothing going on between me and Riley.

Only because you blew it,

which apparently runs in the family.

What are you talking about?

She told me she put herself out there

and that you freaked out.

One time.

She put herself out there one time.

I did it, like, a thousand times,

and I'm not gonna do it again.

If this is gonna work, she has to make the effort.

Yeah, I'll be sure to tell her that.

- (Door closes) - Crap.

I'm gonna have to tell her that.

Hi! Hey, me again.

Um, look, not that I want to get in the middle of any of this,

but I'm just saying if it was me,

and we've clearly established that it isn't,

I'd want to know that I was special to you

before I made a move.

You really think so?

I know so. So, are we done now? Cool.

Uh, how about a picnic?

Um, maybe in the tree house where he carved our initials.

It's on the roof, and I saved the board.

Really? You kept that?

The whole time we were dating?

Kind of seems like a red flag, don't you think?

But I'm fine.

I mean, that's perfect.

So, do you think you could get him up there in an hour?

Oh, joy. I'm part of the plan.

Okay, sure.

- Okay. - See you.

Oh, Danny,

would you mind running downtown and picking up the tuxes?

Oh, I'll do that!

Uh, Danny's gotta be somewhere very important

in... three minutes.

Okay, people, we got a little problem.

Is Mrs. Wheeler here?

Problem? Did I hear problem?

I thought I heard him say "problem."

Okay, okay, let's just try to stay calm.

There's no reason to freak out.

Just a couple of teeny tiny little blips.

The venue canceled, the caterer quit,

and the florist said they've never heard of you.

There's not gonna be a wedding.

No!