You'll Never Get Rich

Slow down for a minute, will you, please, Jenkins?

All right, go ahead. Thank you.

Where are we, Jenkins?

5th Avenue, sir.

Well, l can see that, but why are we here?

Well, don't you remember, sir?

This is your wedding anniversary.

Oh, of course, of course. My 15th.

Delightful occasion. Thank you, Jenkins.

Good morning, Mr. Cortland.

I 'd like to get a bracelet, please.

Diamond, of course. Here we are.

Now, is this something like we have in mind?

Or perhaps this?

Oh, that's beautiful.

I'll take that.

Fine. To tell you the truth, that's my preference.

Now, will there be anything else?

No, thank you.

Oh, yes, yes.

l want to get something for my wife too.

How much is this?

Seven dollars.

Will you put it in one of your very best boxes, please?

- Yes. - Incidentally, what is it?

It's a Chinese back scratcher.

That's fine. Always wanted to have one of those.

Shall we send it, sir?

No, no, I'll give it to Mrs. Cortland myself.

And about the bracelet, sir?

I want that engraved.

Yes, and to whom?

To my dear, sweet...

May I use your telephone, please?

Why, of course. Right over there.

I'll have her name for you in just a minute.

The boss wants you on the phone.

Thanks. I'm through with this table, Joe.

Someone's still a beat off.

Hello, chief.

By the way, Robert,

what's the name of that pretty girl

in the front line of the modern group?

The new one,

the one with the dimples on her knee?

Oh, Sheila Winthrop.

Yeah, that's right.

Oh, Miss Winthrop...

Yes, Mr. Curtis?

Now, there's nothing l admire more

than the spirit of independence,

but sometimes it can be carried too far.

For instance, our group is known for absolute precision.

All the other girls are doing this dance one way,

and you're doing it another.

I'm sorry, but I don't know that part of the routine.

Would you like to try it with me?

I'd love to.

Tommy, let's have the second 24 bars.

Ready? One and two and...

That's much better. Thank you.

Thank you.

All right, now, listen, kids.

I want the whole number.

Come on. Places, please.

It's "Boogie Barcarolle" from the top,

and I'll do it with you.

Are you ready?

Music.

Now, give me some nice straight lines, please. Go.

That's it. Take five minutes.

Sheila...

Just who do you think you're kidding?

- I don't know what you mean. - You know what I mean.

You know that dance routine as well as l do.

That's right.

Then why do you muff it when Mr. Curtis is around?

Because I like to dance with him.

Is that all?

I like the way he talks.

Is that all?

I like his personality.

Is that all?

Isn't that enough?

It's a good beginning,

but don't get your hopes up, dear.

Why not?

Because for eight hours every day,

Mr. Curtis is up to his hips in beautiful girls,

and we all look alike to him.

- Really? - Yes.

To a hungry man,

a lamb chop is a tasty dish,

but to the butcher,

it's just another hunk of meat.

Miss Winthrop, Mr. Cortland wants to see you in his office.

I take it all back, dear.

Thank you, Mr. Curtis.

What do you take back, Marge?

Oh, nothing. Just a remark l made about lamb chops.

Come in.

You sent for me, Mr. Cortland?

Yes, yes, l thought we might have a little chat.

Won't you sit down, please?

Thank you.

You know that l own this theater?

Yes, l do.

Fine, fine.

Did you know that l took an interest in your work?

Really?

Well, so much so that this morning,

as l was walking down 5th Avenue,

l saw something rather beautiful.

It reminded me of you.

I wanted you to have it very much,

and so l bought it for you.

This couldn't be a diamond bracelet, could it?

Well, yes, as a matter of fact.

It's engraved,

"To my dear, sweet Sheila ."

something l thought of.

How lovely.

We do understand each other, then, don't we?

Yes, we do, don't we?

Good.

Now, l 've got a little plan.

I'm sorry.

Hello?

Mrs. Cortland is on her way in.

Thank you, Cummings.

I'm terribly sorry about this.

I quite understand.

Maybe this way would be better.

You are lovely, my dear.

Thank you, Mr. Cortland.

Oh, thank you, Miss Winthrop.

We'll consider the proposition closed, then.

I'm thinking of putting her under long-term contract.

She's an old friend of the family.

My family.

Her father and my father, you know. Like that.

- She's beautiful, isn't she? - Who?

Oh, she?

In a superficial sort of way.

Will you stop looking at me like that?

Like what?

Well, you ought to know. You're doing it.

Do we have to fight on our wedding anniversary?

How did you happen to remember that?

Well, Jenkins told me.

Very thoughtful of Jenkins.

Well, l was thoughtful too. l bought you a present.

It's over there in my coat pocket

if you want to go and look for it.

Oh!

Oh, it's lovely, Martin.

Interesting gadget, isn't it?

Gadget?

Yes, it's to scratch your back.

Scratch your back?

Yes, it's Chinese.

You know, you scratch it up and down and crosswise.

What on earth are you talking about?

Oh, wait a minute. I'll show you how it works.

Where did you get that?

Out of your pocket.

Look, my dear, there's been an awful mistake.

I can see there has.

Who is "dear, sweet Sheila"?

Oh, she's the little girl that just went out.

Now, don't jump to conclusions.

No, no, l won't.

We'll take it nice and easy.

But, Julia, you do not understand.

No, l know l don't, dear,

but l will when you explain.

Would you believe me if l told you

that l bought that for Robert Curtis?

Oh, it should look lovely on him.

Oh, don't be ridiculous.

Robert is crazy about Miss Winthrop,

and he asked me to pick a present out for her,

so l did.

See?

Frankly, I'm disappointed in you.

There was a time when your alibis were gems.

Remember the time you were involved with the Russian dancer?

She was Portuguese.

Before you talked your way out of that one,

you had rewritten the "Arabian Nights"

Now you've lost your imagination.

You're getting commonplace, and I'm getting bored with you.

Bored? With me?

Is it my fault you reached into the wrong pocket?

You started the whole thing.

That's the trouble around here

No privacy,

people reaching into wrong pockets,

no organization...

How's a man to run a theater?