Kevin Can Wait

- Hey. Eggnog's ready. - Oh.

I put some brandy in, not knowing Kendra

had already added some rum.

Bottom line, it's gonna be

a very merry Christmas.

I could go for a little nog

after setting up those lights.

Jack, you're too young. It's only for us adults.

Ah! Nice try, Sara.

Come on, there's kid eggnog in the fridge.

Let me get this straight.

You really didn't get me a gift? You're kidding, right?

No. We said we weren't exchanging.

Yeah, but I thought we were doing the thing where

we say we're not getting gifts, but we do anyway.

Then you thought wrong.

Well, still, I got you one.

- I don't want it. - It's a gift.

You got to take it.

- Says who? - Says the rules.

Look, I-I got you one. Now I want mine.

Well, then take the one you were gonna give me

and give it to yourself.

No! I don't want golf balls!

By the way, I got you golf balls.

Hey, how we lookin' on the lights, people?

We are good to go, Mr. Gable.

All right, Jackie boy, hit it.

- Hey, hey! - Yeah!

There you go.

So, can we open our presents now?

Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow your roll, playa, all right?

You know the rule. Every Christmas Eve...

We get one gift from Santa.

That's right, and I hand them out. Let's do it.

So you're saying you're Santa?

No, I'm saying I'm the guy in charge of handing out...

Do you want to play this game?

- I do not. - Yeah.

Come in!

- Hey. - Hey. Hey.

Merry Christmas, everybody.

I just wanted to drop a few gifts off for the kids.

All right, well, take a seat.

Come on. Yeah, what can we get you to drink?

You want an eggnog? A hot toddy?

What, do you have a hot toddy?

I don't. I-I just like saying it.

Hot toddy? Anybody for a hot toddy?

Anybody? Hot toddy?

I do it every year. Every year, I toddy it up.

- That's cute. - No, I-I'm good.

I just want to get home and get into my PJs.

Wait. What? But it's Christmas Eve.

Yeah. It's kind of my thing.

You know, I turn on my fake fireplace,

have some wine, karaoke Donna Summer until I pass out.

All right, look, it's not up for discussion. You're staying.

Chale, can you do me a favor? Can you get her a nog?

- Come on. - All right. Thank you.

Oh, I almost forgot.

Got you a little something.

Ah. What is this?

A box of doughnuts?

- Yeah, from the night we met. - I'm confused.

Christmas Eve. Thank you. 23 years ago.

Oh, that's why the doughnuts.

I still don't get it.

How do you not get it?

If I say I get it, can I just... Can I eat the doughnuts?

I am talking about the night we became partners.

I-I'm blanking.

Okay.

We were rookies. We got stuck working together.

I... Really?

Hey. How you doing? Vanessa Cellucci.

- Kevin Gable. - Hi. Sorry I'm late.

Oh. Happens to all of us.

- Excuse me. - Yeah.

Car 217. Uh, in service.

Sorry for the delay. Was awaiting partner.

We're moving now. 15 minutes late.

Due to Cellucci.

Ready to do this?

Wow.

One second.

What...

What are you... What are you doing?

Just testing the equipment. I like to give it a roundabout.

I'm pretty... I'm pretty sure it works.

I'll decide if and when she works.

It works.

Thank you. I feel so much safer now.

- Sandwich? - No, thanks.

Training. For the NFL.

Oh, you're serious.

Deadly.

So, that's your plan?

Professional football player?

That is the plan.

Epic 10-year career on the gridiron,

then circle it back to law enforcement.

FBI or... This stays in the car...

CIA.

This doesn't stay in the car...

You're outta your mind.

You know what? This engine is fueled

by other people's put-downs, so just keep me gassed up.

- It's fine. - All right.

Come on.

Um, what are you...

What are you doing?

Just these pagers.

Sometimes you got to move 'em around to get a signal.

Um, that's not how it works, but okay.

You know what? If you're gonna keep staring at that thing

while you're behind the wheel,

you might as well let me drive.

Why would I do that?

Everybody already knows I'm

the best wheelman at the precinct.

Well, that changes now.

'Cause, I'm here.

Oh, right. Forgot, 1994.

Women's lib.

Whatever you want to call it,

I'm just... I'm a better driver.

You're... You're a better driver?

- I'm a better driver. - Driver, Okay. Okay.

O-O-O-Okay.

All right, you know what?

We could just settle this right now.

- You want to do it now? - Yeah, before the Jets call

and your big football career

takes off, of course. I mean...

Let's do this.

Wait, was he really that annoying?

I haven't even gotten to the annoying part yet.

Please, it's called being a good cop.

Yeah, great story.

Can I have my present now?

Jack take it easy.

It's Christmas, I'm 12.

I wanna open something.

All right, here you guys go. Okay?

Now, please tell me you're not doing that thing

where you give us a bad gift and then the good gifts.

No, I'm not doing anything.

I'm just following Santa's instructions.

- Batteries?! - I got the same thing.

Oh. I guess that's what you guys got this year.

Enjoy it!

Dad, I hate this game.

Can we just go ahead and get the good gift?

Okay, right there, see, that is the

poor attitude, because you know what?

You never know what those batteries

might be for!

Huh?

A drone! What?!

Headphones! Thank you.

But these don't need batteries.

Classic fake-out.

Okay, back to the story.

I'm still confused. Where do the doughnuts come in?

I am getting to that.

You ready?

Pfft. Born.

All right, before we do this, what...

What is the deal with the pager?

It's a private matter, all right?

It doesn't pertain to you.

- It's a girl. - I didn't say that.

You didn't have to. What's her name?

If you must know, her name's Nunya.

- Nunya? - Nunya business.

Now get to driving.

All right, buckle up.

Slow down a little bit. Getting a little...

Getting a little unsafe.

Pull up your skirt, Mary.

Okay. All right.

Okay, wait!

Slow down!

Okay!

Biiiiiig finish!

No, no, no!

And... there.

You said something about my driving?

Oh, sounds like Ms. Vanessa

has some mad skills behind the wheel, yo.

Sorry, I was... trying out a new thing.

Wow, Dad. So she beat you?

L-Look at me. You think she's gonna beat me?

Can you just drive already?

Gonna give you a little "Knight Rider"

with a splash of "Beverly Hills Cop II."

- Okay. - By the way, how's it taste?

- How does what taste? - Muh duuuuuust!

And that's how it's done, son.