Hatsukoi Monster (First Love Monster)

I'm not about to lose! My justice will never lose!

It's always the same with you!

Time to realize the error of your ways!

Which one? Who will it be?!

Kanade!

Tomu!

T-Tomu won!

No...

The real winner is love.

I-It's poop!

Phew! That was a blast!

I'm exhausted.

Next time, let's have a space-robot war!

Yeah!

"Love," huh?

Thank you very much for everything.

Get home safe, now.

Yes, sir.

Sorry you had to come and get me, Mr. Takahashi.

Why were you snooping around a primary school in the first place?

Kaho's in a real fix.

And she can't talk about it.

To be ignored by her ex Kanade and mistaken for a stalker?

It's complicated, huh.

Oh, that's right: you got a call from home.

Huh?

They said you weren't answering your cell. It seemed urgent.

Oh!

That urgent, huh?

You have telegrams, too.

Look at them all...

I-I'll just give him a call.

What's with that moan?!

I... I'm going home!

What?!

Hey, Kanade, what was your deal in dodgeball today?

Going down in one hit—isn't your heart in it?

I've got something to say, too. Look here!

When it comes to serving fair lunch portions, you can't be beat!

So why do I have two carrots?!

It's not like you!

He's right. It's not.

I can't say I'm quite myself yet either...

...but looking at you, I think we're the same.

Kanade, you're lovesick, aren't you.

You did break up with that one girl, right?

So it's a new girl?

What a play-ball!

Right?

That's playboy!

Hanako.

Who's Hanako?

Hey! Are you listening?

Who's Hanako?!

Kaho...

What the heck is going on with Kanade, anyway?

At times like this, there's only one thing we, as friends, can do!

The Ten-Time Quiz!

Yay! Yum-yum eat-'em-up!

Kanade, say "rest" ten times.

Rest, rest, rest, rest, rest, rest, rest, rest...

In the "ten-time quiz" game,

one person makes another say a given word ten times,

then asks a question to provoke an incorrect, yet amusing response.

It is said to have its roots in ancient Rome,

where a pizzeria owner would jab his cusTomuers with his elbow

when they inevitably fell for his trick and said "knee" instead.

...rest, rest.

Now add a B!

Rest-buh.

Huh?!

No, it's "breast"! "Breast"!

That's right! Kanade got it wrong! Ha-ha!

Kanade...

He got it wrong!

Rest-buh!

I'm home.

Pardon the intrusion.

Hey, Kanade.

We're having your favorite tonight: batter-fried fishcake with seaweed.

You're supposed to gargle when you get home.

What's going on with Kanade?

I think he must be lovesick.

Huh?!

That Kanadeis not Kanade.

But I don't know what to do. I followed him home, but...

Oh, I see. Now that is a problem.

"Children's Telephone Helpline"?

You mean, kids can call this number

and a grown-up will answer all their questions?

All of them?!

Really? Awesome! Let's do it!

What are we gonna ask, huh? Huh?

They help with your problems...?

Something naughty?

Kanade! Don't you have something you want to ask?

M-Me?

Oh! I have something I wanna ask a grown-up about!

You do?!

Yes.

Okay, let's borrow Dad's cell!

Yeah!

Yesss!

Kanade and the gang seem interested, anyway.

When you mentioned running a children's telephone hotline,

I wasn't sure what to expect.

I just wanted to help out those kids, so worried about Kanade.

But really?

Do you think Kazu will call anytime soon

I've got something to ask him!

L-Like about you-know-what and such-and so!

Don't the kids do the asking?

This can't end well.

And you-know-where!

Hello?

Excuse me, is this the Children's Telephone Helpline?

It's Kazu! So soon?!

Um, hello?

What underwear are you wearing?

Wh-What happened?

I must have dialed the wrong number. I got a pervert.

Arashi, don't tell me that's what you wanted to ask him!

I instinctively blurted out...

You're the worst!

...what I most wanted to ask.

Those kids are taking these calls seriously!

Next time, I'm picking up!

H-Hello, Children's Telephone Helpline.

I have a question: Which is softer, a rest-buh—

no, a breast or a cream puff?

Whaaat?!

Breasts: close encounters of the third kind.

Who cares about that stuff?

Huh?!

Th-that s right. Boring.

It is not! Let's see you answer, Kazu!

You might have touched a breast, so you know which is softer!

I-I don't know! Don't ask me!

Something's fishy!

Normally you'd say, "That's not even possible!

No way—have you seriously felt up a girl's breasts?

I didn't say I felt them up!

I-I just bumped into them!

So you touched them? Whose? Hanako's?!

Hanako's, right?

Quit being weird!

The helpline person will hear—

What's up, Kouta?

He just bumped into them!

Lucky! I'd like to touch and pet girl-mode Kouta's breasts,

even watch him from afar and take pictures,

play guessing-games like, "Is this your nipple?"

And if that's off-limits, then I can move to his...

He just bumped into them!

I'm asking you nicely: please stop!

Why would you even say such things?

Don't you have a girlfriend? What about Chiaki?

Kouta, I love Chiaki more than anyone in the world.

However...

What I'm saying is: I love Chiaki, but I desire girl-boys.

For a second there, you'd created this illusion

that you'd said something amazing.

A first-rate pervert's trick.

You flatter me.

Advice?

It doesn't have to be.

Just what you're thinking, what's bothering you.

Putting it into words should help you understand.

Hello?

Is this the Children's Telephone Helpline?

Yes, it is.

I...

What is it?

Don't overthink it. Just say whatever is on your mind.

I thought I wasn't lonely with everyone here.

Yes?

But I am lonely, somehow.

Why is that?

I want to talk about our class killifish laying eggs...

...but the crayfish I put in the tank ate them all.