Katte ni Kaizō (かってに改蔵)

If you turn me into a cyborg

Kaizou suru nara

install a self-destruct device

Jibaku souchi wa

as an option

opshon tsukete kure

If I

Kimi o

can't protect you

Mamotte yarenai nara

living

Ikiteru

has no meaning

imi nai

at all to me

ore na no dakara

Even in my erased memories

Kesareta kioku ni sae mo

there's no memory of the two of us

futari no omoide nai

That's my one-sided and self-destructive love

Sou wansaido jibaku no aisa

I am still young

Atara wakai

but willing to exchange my life for yours

Inochi o hikikaeshita tote kamawanai

I'll become

Kimi no

your hero

hiiroo ni naru

If you are

kimi ga akutou de

kidnapped by villains

saratte kureta nara

You can upgrade me as you please

katte ni kaizou shite mo ii ze

Katte Ni

Kaizou

presents

Katte Ni

Kaizou

Second year student of Torauma High School, Katsu Kaizō is a cyborg.

Attacked by mysterious people and left close to death with severe injuries

he was turned into a cyborg by genius scientist Saien Suzu

which saved his life.

She brought along with her the underling Tsubouchi Chitan

along with whom Kaizō continues his fight.

Or at least, this is what he imagines.

Not yielding to the rain...

Not yielding to the wind...

Every day, four adult magazines, adult videos,

and a few tissues to use

in making a quiet raid.

This is how I want to be!

NOOOOOO!

Are You Going To Recite It!?

Torauma Prefectural High School

Sciencevestigation Club

Oh, Chitan-kun, what's with that poem?

Poem?

Oh, younger brother mine / for thee I come / prithee to pull out thy lots / of pubic hair

Oh, younger brother mine / for thee I come / prithee to pull out thy lots / of pubic hair

Oh, younger brother mine / for thee I come / prithee to pull out thy lots / of pubic hair

Oh, younger brother mine / for thee I come / prithee to pull out thy lots / of pubic hair

What the hell is this?

Who did that?

Someone's making fun of me!? I'll kill him!

Calm down, that was probably Kaizō's doing.

Sup!

What's wrong?

Waiting in phimosis / Waiting in phimosis / One day will I diligently fake a penis

Waiting in phimosis / Waiting in phimosis / One day will I diligently fake a penis

Waiting in phimosis / Waiting in phimosis / One day will I diligently fake a penis

What the hell is this?!

When did this...

You didn't notice that?

When you're that lazy, stuff like this happens.

Everyone's so stupid!

Umi-chan, your legs...

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Hey, these legs are great!" you said, and so henceforth July 6th shall be Intercrural Day

What is this!? Unforgivable!!

Geez, that really is unforgivable. Why does he get a better poem than me?!

That's not the problem here!!

Speaking of which, there are rumors of a mysterious poetry club that's causing trouble lately.

A mysterious poetry club causing trouble...

That means they're enemies, aren't they?

Where did that suddenly come from?

They are enemies!

Are you looking for us?

You guys...!

That's right, we are the...

Screaming Urine Bottles!!

And I am their leader, Dorian Mukegawa.

TL Note: Mukeru - to pull back + gawa - skin, i.e. the foreskin

ALL WE CAN DO RIGHT NOW

IS JUST CONTINUE TO SCREAM!

Put some damn clothes on!!

WHY DO YOU WANT

TO BEAT US UP?

ALL WE WANT TO DO IS

RECITE POETRY!

WE'RE NOT DOING ANYTHING WRONG!

Now that you mention it, that's right.

You're not wearing any clothes, dammit!

That's right, in this constitutional nation, being completely naked is already a felony.

How sad this is...

What's sad about that?!

We're not entirely naked.

That's true...

Well, half-naked then.

I don't really think they're half-naked, either.

4/5ths naked then.

No, maybe more like 7/8ths naked...?

Anyway, you'll pay the price for writing this obscene poem on my legs!

If you just can't forgive us, we have no choice. We'll have to pay it!

But...do you know our weakness!?

It's right there!

How did-?!

Isn't it completely obvious?

Our weakness has been discovered, there's nothing we can do!

RETREAT!!

LOOK OUT!!

Wait!

Crap, I lost sight of them.

Is there no one whom this urine bottle might fit?

Is this Cinderella now?!!

Could it be me by any chance...?

Oh, it fits exactly!

And then Cinderella and the Prince lived happily ever after...

They did NOT!

Now you've shown your true form, Dorian Mukegawa!

Cra-!

It's unfair to make someone all dreamy with a Cinderella story!

But I wonder if you'll be able to attack us!

Look at this!

Don't you care about what happens to these cute little goldfish?

That's unfair!

I can't stand this anymore!

Chief, please do something about these vulgar people!

All right.

Well, like this maybe...

As if...!

I thought something like this might happen so I made this.

Here's yours, Umi-chan!

They sell those at Hands you know.

Argh, I'm sorry my goldfish!

Cwap, I won't forgib youuu!

Forgib....?

Allow me to explain.

When Dorian Mukegawa put on the urine bottle, his foreskin was pulled back and he became an adult.

Adult

Adult

Adult

But when the urine bottle was removed, the foreskin fell back and he turned back into a child.

Child

Child

A tunnel, a tunnel...

Ah, this is no good...

Crap, the Leader's in a jam!

Let's make a new one!

Please accept this!

A hundred times more power!! Dorian Mukegawa!

Gaaaahh, it's hot!!

That's true...

Crap, you keep trying to get back at me!

Aren't you just destroying yourself?

Well, how about this then?!

That's a ship in a bottle! Seems like he's rich!

I didn't just insert it after construction!

First, you insert your flaccid penis into the urine bottle's opening.

Then, put the parts in through the gap with tweezers and build it.

Lastly, erect your penis which closes the gap and it's completed.

How's that? It took me three months.

Great. What about your dick?

Naturally, I haven't washed it.

Don't be proud of that!!

Oi, you can't bring something filthy like that into our school!

Pulverization!

At that time, Kaizō sensed a great danger with his animal instincts.

The dick that hadn't been washed in three months had emitted gases that filled up the urine bottle.

GRAB!!

Fly, my slave!

Do you have anything to say before your noble death?

Urine bottles tell no tales.

If you've learned your lesson from this, become something useful to society.

Useful to society?

The Next Day

And thus, they changed their hearts and became useful to society as "cats-go-home-bottles".

Why me, too?

Shimonoke

x x

Could you stop doing this in front of my house?

Actually, this doesn't work at all, does it?

I don't think that's the problem here.

Kōji Age: 13

The older girl from the neighborhood, Asami

Kou-chan,

have you ever... kissed someone?

Kōji Age: 14