More Ants in the Pants (Knallharte Jungs)

Hey! Hallo!

Wake up!

My name's Florian Thomas. This morning, my dick started talking to me.

Hallo!

Wake up!

Come on! It's all down to us.

From now on, we are a team!

- A team? - Yep, you and me.

From that day on, he never stopped talking.

Produced by Bernd Eichinger

Let's go! Look! You can ski down those tits!

And you can wrap those legs round your head three times.

- Paragraphs not counting! - Do you know what? You have a problem,

She looks keen, Hey, we've hit a jackpot!

-You see girls as sex objects. -And the problem is?

Have you ever considered more important things, other than sex?

- Like what? - Personality, for example.

-I love girls with personality. -Show me a girl with personality.

Take, for example, that girl. She's got two handfuls of personality.

- What about a sense of humor? - Sense of humor? Let's see.

- That girl! She has tons of humor. - You're a monster!

- Who? Me? - Yes, you!

-I'm your best friend. -Or my worst enemy.

- But listen. I am a part of you! - Not all girls are interested in

... your filthy thoughts. - Of course! They are.

But they are not.

Her name is Maja Paradys. That sounds almost like "paradise".

Only misspelled. She is wise, charming, funny ... Just perfect.

Apart from a tiny problem. - She is not interested in you.

What the heck, look ... Free listing!

I'm fed up with you always putting me in awkward situations.

- Would you, then? - I wish only to have my dream girl.

This particular person. The girl of my dreams. Poets would call her "the only one".

- "Soul partner," lovers call it ... - Or rappers would call her "yo, bitch".

OK. Go and talk to her.

- What if she won't talk to me? - Wow! At least she'll talk to you.

- She wants you! - Are you crazy?

- She's the new teacher! - So what? Oh-ho-ho-ho!

- What's the big deal? I think it's time to cop a feel. - Cop a feel? With her? Are you mad?

- With what? - What then?

Go behind her and grab her tits. If she turns around and smiles,

she likes it.

Quick, behind!

Bertram...

- Quick, get behind her. - What if she doesn't smile?

All women like it.

Wow, look

A good start. Put your hands on her ass.

- How? - Do as you would push yourself.

- Oh ... 'Sorry. - Great! Now move up to the tits!

Now slowly move your hands around her bells.

- Oh, Hallo Florian. - Hallo, Mrs. Müllerschön.

Did you see her smile? She loves it.

And squeeze them!

Check if they're firm.

Out the way, bitch.

Don't call me bitch, you bitch!

I'll call you what I want. Just shut up.

As in video games,

Women's Field Hockey is the perfect mixture of sex and violence.

Great. Diane is hurt. And who replaces her now?

Here, here! Hallo! Me!

Guys, I'll tell you what: snip your dicks off,

and you can join us here!

Oh!

Shot Training.

The teacher? You must have been desperate.

Hm?

Her tits. Are they real or silicone?

- Oh, real. - No!

I've said it! She with the ashes!

Go on, Maja.

I dream of having a girlfriend like her.

Then I would never look at other girls.

Oh, my God. Maja!

With such a girl, a boy never needs other girls.

Let it not escape. Kiss her now!

Hallo Maja!

Filthy pervert!

According to your school report...

...groping your teacher is not your usual behaviour. Well, Florian ...

This is a typical male fantasy. The first symptom, the man on a ...

fascination of sex, is unable to control his eyes away from female breasts.

The second symptom is to come to womens' legs

Then an uncontrollable admiration for women's feet.

You might know that it is foot fetish.

There is an effective treatment only.

- What? - Castration.

What?

Relax.

A small joke of sex therapists.

I'll give you something to... calm yourself down there a bit.

This funny Sex Doctor probably helps! I wonder when she gives a house visit.

Ah!

It has 3 speeds.

It's the top of the model range, Kung Fu grip.

Best of luck, Florian. And do you think

once you you reach the door, do not hesitate, grab her tits?

Yes! Come on, do it now!

What about us?

Do not forget your medicine.

Next, please.

From now on, Maja and the other girls

will associate Florian with sexual superiority - What?

I'll give you an example. I once knew a gigantic girl.

She told me that she always lit a match...

when it smelled like she'd been to the toilet.

So every time I go for a dump...

I light a match.

So what's the big deal? - No idea.

Well, I think about her, of course! So, I shit at least once a day.

Maybe even twice. That’s it, at least once a day I think of her.

And that's association!

- What's that shit got to do with Flo and Maja? - Think of the association.

Flo kissed her and got a hard on. And Maja saw it.

- So each time she sees a hard on, she'll think of Flo. - That's ridiculous!

- You might tell nonsense! - And it was obvious that she liked it.

Do you want to lose some more money?

I'll bet any sum,

- In one week, Maja will be falling at Flo's feet. - Agreed. Double or quit.

If we win, you will stand in the middle of town One hour ... naked.

- No problem. She'll never do it. - No, never.

- Can I have a word in this? - No!

- What was that all about? - Man, I would never have put money on it

if I thought it was Mission Impossible. I have a perfect plan,

but first, how did you get on?

I've got the solution here. How about this?

The modern toys brings nothing ... Listen. Your thing, in your pants,

is like a loaded gun. And if you do not use it from time to time

then at some point you will get hurt. I bring you a better thing.

From generation to generation this has been passed in my family

Has never failed, guaranteed Relaxation in any situation.

Just look at those.

Oh, and the ...

And the ...

Wow!

Uäh!

What then?

1953?

Pretty old.

Who cares? The women are great!

Yes, you're right.

- Well, it was really old. - Old? This was an heirloom!

- You know, it's just so .. - Flo, all of these pictures have historical value.

Over the years, they've always saved me. For example, Linda, yes?

This has always healed my sorrow. Just like ... Alison, Sharon and Wendy.

These girls are more than just pictures. They're like ... good old friends.

That's what I mean. Suppose she was 25 in 1953.

It was 50 years ago.

Now, she's 75 years old.

- Boah, that's disgusting! - Yes, and it gets worse.

- No, this cannot be! - But because it came to me

that all those fantastic women were old enough to be grandmothers.

- So, I thought of my grandmother. - Stop it!

But! What would she think in heaven

looking down at her grandson

trousers down and dick out...

- They should die again. - You'd need a crane to get me up!

Well, then, if that is so ...

have another look at the pictures.

Practice makes perfection.

- Is this Maja's house? - Yeah. Now do not worry.

Everything is prepared. Remember. the grandma is very old and helpless.

The family is looking for a nurse, who can look after grandma.

Maja will be in proximity. And in some days, she is perhaps a victim of your charm.

I do not know. But I'm lying to her.

Everything comes cheap and smeary. I should be more honest.

Do you want her or not?

Hallo. Oh, you must be the new carer. Come in.

Thanks for giving me the opportunity.

- You? - Oh, you know each other already?

Well, then I leave you alone

- What are you doing here? - Wow! Grab her tits! Girls love it!

- Shut up! - What?

I'm the new nurse for your granny.

I think not. This is ironical of you.

Well good, because you are here, this is the grandma's room.

She would be called "Miss Paradis". She is almost 99, in a couple of days.

but you would not say that.

- She is quite tough for her age. - Ah, I am already prepared.

And ... Never give her alcohol. She'll order you to bring her some.

And you are really hard to refuse

Do not worry.

If something goes wrong, the job

is over!

Hallo, grandma

I would introduce you to someone He will from now on be your carer.

Let's go.

At best, you bring her something to eat.

Well, Fra ... Ms. Paradis,

what are you watching? - What's the matter to you?

Good day. My name is Florian Thomas.

- Do you have any beer? - Ts-ts.

Beer, however, is not good for you.

Unlike ... This delicious soup here.

Is it beer soup?

No. I think this is pea soup.

- Definitely pea soup. - Get out of here!

And don't come back, unless you have beer

But that was not nice of you, Ms. Paradis.