Star Trek: Lower Decks

Evasive maneuvers!

Fire at will!

We're being boarded!

Then let's throw them a welcoming party.

The device, hand it over!

I'll destroy this before I let y... aah!

Temba!

Commanders, the asset has been obtained.

Excellent.

Destroy this joke of a Federation ship.

Leave no survivors.

All decks!

I hoped I would never have to give this order, but...

- all hands to es... - Captain, incoming ship.

It's the Wayfarer.

- No! - Ugh!

Thank the Prophets.

Send those thanks

to Captain Bucephalus Dagger.

Commander Doodle, I think it's time

we introduce this warbird to the biggest kid on the block.

You heard the Cap. Target those disruptors.

Dagger? Get us out of here.

No! I want his head!

Don't be greedy, sister. We've already won.

They just don't know it yet.

Captain, they're retreating.

Should I set a course to pursue?

Let 'em run.

Protecting the Cerritosis our top priority.

You're late, Dagger.

What you do, stop for raktajino?

What were the Melponar triplets after this time?

The Chronogami.

A top-secret Starfleet prototype

which can penetrate temporal barriers.

"Chrono" because it involves taking time,

and folding it on itself like the Japanese artform...

Yeah, origami, right, yeah, we-we get it.

I thought the Chronogami was theoretical.

Well, consider the theory proved.

- And now the Romulans have it. -

And I bet my pips

- they're going... -

Computer, freeze program.

Ensign Boimler,

please report to Commander Ransom's office.

- On my way. - I thought you were off duty.

I am. Ransom just probably wants me to spot him.

He just learned Tellarite deadlifts.

Whoa, baby! That opening was awesome, Boims.

Yeah, but time travel? Listen, "Captain Dagger."

Don't tell me we're gonna have to go back and assassinate

Kennedy because that is not happening.

Okay, don't worry.

Crisis Point Ilis twice as good as the original.

Crisis Point? No! You can't just piggyback off my movie.

Technically, it was my program first.

So I can do what I want.

Uh, Computer, arch.

That doesn't contractually obligate you

- to make a bad sequel. - Is this a sequel?

I mean, Vindicta got blown up.

You don't follow the villain.

We're back with the Cerritosbridge crew.

Trust me, you're gonna love it.

It's got everything: action, adventure, romance.

I'll skip ahead to the opening credits, uh, okay.

Freeman just explained that the Chronogami can be used

to destroy any point in history.

What, does it make an alternate cinematic timeline that runs

concurrent to our own, but with, like, different people

playing younger versions of us?

Uh, scientifically that would be a bit of a reach.

Whatever. If you're expanding the Vindictaverse,

I'm just saying it better not suck.

Let me know if you want some hot sauce while you're eating

those words in the third act.

I'll be right back.

Ooh!

Wait, what's my character's name again?

Looks like you're Chief Engineer

- Sylvo Toussant. Ooh, Cajun?

: Mon cheri, I guarantee

I can do that...

: Nah, I'm just gonna play it straight.

I play Lieutenant Commander Meena Vesper,

Whose love of science and exploration

is tempered by her troubled childhood.

This is such fan fiction.

All right, I've got an evaluation

with Ransom at 1900.

Boims better not draw this out.

Ah, the auteur has returned.

What did, uh, what did Ransom want?

Uh, just reassigning duty shifts.

Oh, the credits are ending.

Let's get back in character.

[Rutherford blows raspberry, laughs]

Rutherford, shh!

The Chronogami Project was headed up by...

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Dr. Helena Gibson.

Bucephalus.

Oh, you have got some nerve

never calling me back after that weekend on Risa.

Oh, ho, ho, ho, spicy!

Oh, so this gorgeous scientist

is the estranged love interest? Yeah, sure.

I'm here for your research, not your heart.

Look, the Romulans have the Chromogami.

Oh, of-of course.

Whoa, these graphics are mind-blowing!

Rutherford.

We've learned there are space-time worldlines

that prevent the beginning of existence

from merging with the end.

The Chronogami's gravitons essentially fold worldlines,

allowing a user to travel to the past

or the future.

The Romulans could attack any place and any time,

allowing them to wipe the Federation from ever existing.

So many lives just blinked out of existence.

We could run a long-range scan...

And to think, you go to bed probably still thinking

about some task you have to do the next day, then poof.

- You're gone. - Geez.

Somebody took a Winger Bingston acting class.

You can track the Chronogami with this.

It has limited Chronogamic functionality.

Ah, yes, a watch that drives the plot.

Very convenient and not at all dumb.

It detects the chronitons.

It'll lead you right to them.

Looks like they're heading for Tatasciore IX.

A favorite of black-market weapons dealers.

They're probably trying to buy Wallerian Dutronium

to power the Chronogasmic matrix!

Yeah, Doc, you really want to avoid

that many made-up words in a row.

All right, uh, this where we set

a course for Tatasciore IX, so let's do that.

Wait, Bucephalus.

Could we talk... privately?

Ooh, here comes the romance in three, two...

No thanks, I-I-I-I got to go.

"No thanks"?

Wait, you can't cut out the romantic subplot.

A good movie's got to have some romance.

Dagger's love life doesn't matter anymore.

Wait, then why'd you design her so hot?

I don't know what to do now.

Uh, yeah. Me, either, lady. Okay, bye.

Do you feel lost in your way?

Let Minooki guide you.

We have to find the Romulans

or the universe could cease to exist.

We're all holograms in a simulation.

The koala smiles on us all.

Ki-ty-ha has the true answers

for life's most important questions.

Okay, feels like we're just moments away

from a big set piece, aren't we?

What are we talking, a heist? Chase?

Yo, Earth to Dagger, I asked if there's gonna be,

like, a cool chase or something.

I need answers.

Then you seek Ki-ty-ha.

Legend says he resides on the forbidden moon.

What are you doing? The holodeck just populated

that guy into the background for color.

I sense Purplehead knows much.

If one such as he is drawn to this place,

- so shall he who is I. - What in the

alien of the week bullshit?

Okay, boys, come on. We have a movie to do, man.

We don't have time to chat up the extras.

It's an adaptive program.

The-the holodeck's creating meaning

- for these guys... - I've got a lock!

Aah!

Gravcycles, mount up.

Oh, hell yeah! Now we're talking.

Dude, come on, we got to grav!

Come on, we're missing the sequence!

No, we need to find Kit-ty-ha.

Dagger to Vesper, take command of the Chronogami mission.

You are acting captain now.

Ah! Oh, my gosh, thank you!

We just spent like an hour getting the backstory

of your MacGuffin and now we're not going after it?

The path to Ki-ty-ha is perilous,

but the reward is all the truths of the universe.

This could be the key to it all. We got to do this.

This? What is "this"? These random extras?

- I am Knicknac. - Case in point.

Now what the hell does finding

some weirdo have to do with your story?

We-We're gonna go find the meaning of life.

Th-This is better than what I wrote.

This is important.