People Like Us

Are we on? We're on.

Where we at with the levels?

Left. (BEEPS) Right. (BEEPS)

l'm getting a little hum from the guitar amp.

You like it with that sort of gutbucket sound.

I want to be convertible on this.

l want to be able to switch it back if it doesn't fit.

Check, check. Check. That's good.

Jerry, we're ready now.

Groovy, man. Let's go. Yeah, man.

Sleep all day Out all night

l know where you're goin'

l don't think that's actin' right

You don't think it's showin'

So these are your P30 tires, huh? That's right.

-How many? -A hundred thousand.

A hundred thousand?

God, that's a mountain of rubber, Ben.

Please don't tell me you're offloading to a liquidator.

-We use Cemensky Brothers. -Cemensky Brothers?

Look, l'm kind of pressed for time.

-Can you get to the point? -(LAUGHlNG)

What, for 10 cents on the dollar?

Two percent of your wholesale cost?

What happens when they dump 100,000 P30s

to every discount chain that's competing for your clients?

Okay. Ten minutes. Bottom line it for me. What's your cut?

Well, l could pay you 100 cents on the dollar,

your full wholesale cost,

guarantee to re-market overseas

so you don't undercut domestic sales,

and for that, believe me,

it's a river of shit you don't want to go swimming in,

we only pull 30%. commission.

What is it you do again? You buy tires?

Among other things, yeah.

l work in corporate barter. l'm a facilitator.

Thank you so much for taking the time.

Sam Harper, Allied Trade Consultants.

We buy and sell overstock.

lt's the barter system, Omar. The original form of commerce.

Look, every company has leftovers

after a sales cycle, right?

Last year's electronics,

ketchup bottles, kitten calendars,

toys that didn't sell at Christmas.

Anything with an expiration date.

Questionable baby formula.

There's a market for everything, Phil.

Weyerhaeuser Paper, U.S. Steel,

Exxon Mobil, Fortune 500s.

We work for the biggest in the world.

Do you have my card?

Because in this economy, paper is paper,

but goods are good.

Unlike the dollar, barter does not depreciate

one single percent.

lt's the new money.

l mean, that's how you have to think of it.

You are getting in on the ground floor of money!

All right.

Allied Trade Consultants?

Allied Trade and Barter, please hold.

Allied Trade Consultants.

Please hold while l transfer your call.

Sammy! -What's up, baby?

Oh, he's leaving. -Uh-huh. Okay.

l closed Lincoln Tire,

a million, two, in product. Yes!

Yeah, l'll make it right.

You should've seen me in there, buddy. lt was a thing of beauty!

l fed him your "new money" line.

lt was like feeding a baby a pacifier.

Did you ship 100,000 cases of tomato bisque to Ecuador?

Yeah. Yeah, National Soup had overstock they had to dump.

And you shipped by train?

Of course l did. lt was half as much as air freight.

Through Mexico. 1 15 degrees and you ship by train.

-What... What's the problem? -The problem?

-(RlNGlNG) -l'll tell you the problem.

Did you get Dolores on the phone yet?

Yes. Here's the list. She'll be very happy.

Thank you. lt's all about Dolores.

l don't know why you have to

l'm the best guy you have on the floor. l'm a killer.

Am l saving you too much money?

Yeah, you're saving me money

by shipping boxes of soup in an unrefrigerated train car.

-No, no, Jim, they were cans. -No, they were boxes.

l know specifically that they were boxes

because when boxes get hot, they expand,

and when they expand they explode,

and that train car looked like a birthing suite at Bellevue.

Shit!

-You know what you did? -This isn't a big deal, Jim.

You violated nine provisions

of the Sanitary Food Transportation Act.

l get it, Jim. Will you listen to me for a second?

And as soon as the Federal Trade Commission finds out

they're going to shove a flashlight,

a Klieg light, in my anus! They're gonna put a light.

Jesus Christ! Wanna keep it down?

Yeah, they're gonna shine it up there

because they want to shut us down!

You know they want to shut us down!

We barter. We don't pay taxes!

l will go down to National,

l'll talk to Phil Hymore, the VP of Sales...

-He loves me. l'll have... -l talked to Phil Hymore.

Phil Hymore's the one who's threatening to call the FTC.

Phil Hymore's not calling the FTC.

Yeah, he knows he has us over a barrel.

l'll throw him a deal

and corrugate it for his next shipment.

He does not want corrugated. Phil Hymore wants an addition.

-An addition? -To his house.

He wants an addition to his house.

He's got a new wife, Dolores.

She doesn't like the master suite.

Smells his ex in the walls or something. Do l give a shit?

Are you telling me you're bribing Phil Hymore

not to report us to the FTC

by buying him an addition to his house?

For the record, l did not use that word, okay?

You're a genius! Genius!

You moved, what, two million of Lincoln Tire?

Yeah.

What's that in commission, about 80K?

Eighty-four.

Eighty-four thousand.

That should just about cover it.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait. No, no, don't do that to me.

Jim, that's my year! That's my nut, man!

Technically it's not yours, it's mine. Read your contract.

Commissions are discretionary, which means it's up to me.

Jim, l need this money. l need this money.

You need? l need. My two ex-wives need.

My son in rehab needs.

Which is why you need to get everything on this list.

That's lumber, copper, conduit, piping,

everything, all right?

Call your vendors. You got three days. Cut a deal.

Let's see a little ingenuity, okay?

Get me the shit on that list, otherwise your ass is fired!

l'm not kidding!

Shit!

Hannah?

l got to bail on Kim's dinner thing.

l need a horse tranquilizer.

Why are you cooking?

You wouldn't answer your phone.

What's... What's wrong?

Your mom's been trying you all day.

Your dad died.

l'm so sorry.

What's for dinner?

Annie. Sam Harper, Allied Trade. How are you?

l'm in a bind. l'm leaving town for a couple days.

l was just hoping you could help me out.

Get a pen. l'm gonna give you a list of all the stuff...

Yeah... No, l'm sure you are busy,

but l happen to be in the market for a little lumber.

-Next in line, please? -l know... l got to run.

What do you mean there's a lumber shortage

-in the northeast? -Sam... Okay?

lf you help me out with this wood,

l will get your truck fleet...

Sir, we need your photo lD, please.

l'll call you when l land. Bye.

-Sorry about that. That's okay.

-l just need your picture lD. -Yeah, sure.

-What? -(GROANS)

l left it on the table while l was packing.

Sir, we can't let you board the plane without lD.

lt is my father's funeral. Tonight.

lt's a family emergency.

lf you go over to TSA, they can help you.

l can't go to TSA...

Nope, that gets in too late.

ls there anything that gets into L.A. tonight?

Listen, l just need you to be a person right now.

We are trying to get to a funeral.

Yes. Uh-huh. Okay. What about going through...

Come on. Let's go.

What time does that get in?

Okay, let me just get a pen out of the glove compartment.

There are still seats available?

No, that's great. And when does that leave?

l don't know if we can make that,

but let me just write that down.

Oh, my God! Baby, look!

-Oh, my God! -lt was on the floor.

Hang on. lt must have fallen under the seat.

Yeah, it must have fallen out of my...

We can go. We can go right now.

No! She said that was the last flight.

No, no, no. l'm talking to her now.

She said there's a flight, it goes through Denver.

We'll get there late. lt'll be close,

but we'll get there. What's...