Miss Marple

Ah.

Mm.

Arthur...

Tea.

Come in.

Mary!

Oh, Ma'am, Ma'am!

- There's a body in the library! - I, I...

Arthur, wake up.

Hmm?

Arthur.

Dolly?

Mary just said there's a body in the library.

Say that again?

There's a body in the library, Mary just said so.

Impossible! Must've imagined it.

I didn't imagine!

I've told you before, old girl, not to read this sort of thing

last thing at night.

Why's that?

Why hasn't Mary drawn the curtains, hmm?

Arthur?

I am not going downstairs to ask if there's a body in my library!

Arthur?

I directed that nothing should be done till you came down, sir.

Shall I call the police, sir?

Are you seriously trying to tell me

that there's a dead body in my library?

Perhaps you'd care to come and see for yourself, sir.

Hello, Police House?

Right.

Bill! It's for you.

Me?

Hello?

Who's there?

Well?

It's there all right!

But, Arthur!

I know!

It's a complete nonsense!

You really have to pinch yourself, don't you?

A body in our library!

My dear!

Still, there it is, as large as...

Look, old girl. Bound to be a bit of a hullabaloo.

How about some company for you, eh? You know.

What a good idea, Arthur!

That is quite right.

Now, always remember to make it into a nice, pointy mountain.

- Just like that, and well done. - Yes, Ma'am.

Well, the brass looks quite smart.

Well done.

Thank you, Ma'am.

Oh dear, well, I wonder... Who's that?

St Mary Mead 35?

Is that you, Jane?

Oh! You're up very early, Dolly!

My dear! We've just found a body in our library.

I'm coming down to fetch you so that you can see it

before Constable Palk gets here. Is that all right?

Dolly, what are you talking about?

What body?

Yes, quite! That's just it.

We've never seen her before. It ought to be a practical joke,

except that she's dead!

She's a blonde, platinum blonde,

in our library!

You will come, won't you?

That's right, yeah. Is Inspector Slack there, please?

Oh! Your buttons is all wrong!

The Colonel...

Ssshhh!

How come the Colonel don't know nothing about it,

seeing as how it's in his library?

Bill!

Where you be going?

Gossington Hall!

Wait for me!

Arthur's being difficult.

He doesn't think that I were to enjoy myself about it one bit.

But then, I don't know the girl at all.

And it's odd that she doesn't somehow seem to be real,

if you know what I mean.

Yes.

Yes, I do.

I agree. She's not real.

She's very young.

It's all right, Betty, I'll go.

You can, er, you'd better...

Hang on.

Ah Palk, good man.

Morning, Colonel. Perhaps if, er...

You didn't tell me you were bringing the chief constable over?

No, I...

Hallo, Bantry. Just heard the news.

Thought I'd pop over on my way in.

Oh, very good of you.

Has Inspector Slack arrived yet?

Slack? No.

Bad show, all this. In the library, I gather.

Go on in, Constable, I'll join you in a minute.

Mary'll show you. Mary?

Show the constable in.

Thank you, Colonel.

Come on.

Must've been a nasty shock for you. How's Dolly taking it?

- Miss Marple. - Erm... morning, Bill.

Don't worry, Constable. We haven't touched anything.

Even a novice reader of detective stories knows that.

You say you've never seen the girl before?

Never clapped eyes on her.

Ah, Colonel Melchett.

- How are you? - Hello, Mrs Bantry.

And the redoubtable Miss Marple.

- Oh... - Beaten me to it, I see.

Oh. Good morning, Chief Constable.

That's the right word for you, Jane.

Redoubtable.

- I didn't know you two knew each other. - Oh, yes. We're old cronies.

I've long held that Miss Marple has what

I would call forensic intuition developed to the point of genius.

- Oh... - The result, she tells me,

of a lifetime's education in an English village.

Well, one does see so much evil, I fear.

But if I do have any intuition, may I use it now

and suggest my being here makes you uncomfortable?

That's the reason for these compliments, I suspect.

It had crossed my mind that you might dog

our official plodding footsteps.

Nonsense, Melchett.

It's been a bit of a jolt, you know, this business.

Dolly asked Jane over simply... Well, you know, woman to woman.

She may look as if she's taking it calmly,

but with this sort of thing, well, there's no telling, is there?

What?

Have you left us any breakfast, Arthur?

I hardly ate a thing.

Well, there may be not telling what sort of state I'm in,

but I think I could eat a horse.

Jane?

Good. Right. Better take a look at the library, then.

I'll show you.

Thank you, Lorrimer.

Well, Jane?

Well, I suppose she does remind me a little of Mrs Chetty's youngest,

Edie, you know.

I think that's because this poor girl bit her nails.

Yes. Edie was fond of cheap finery too.

- That satin dress she was wearing. - Oh, dear me, yes.

Very poor quality indeed.

But what was she doing in Arthur's library?

Well, she wasn't dressed for burglary, was she?

No. Dressed for dancing. Quite.

- Or a party. - Yes. But we don't have parties.

At least not that sort of party, do we?

Do we?

Oh, no!

Jane!

I knew his mother!

All the same.

Selina Blake is the nicest person imaginable

and she has the finest herbaceous border in the county.

Mind you, Arthur does very nearly burst a blood vessel

whenever Basil Blake's name is mentioned.

Did I ever tell you, Basil Blake was frightfully rude to Arthur.

Terrible argument about the army, Empire, that sort of thing.

And Basil Blake called Arthur a fossilised old B-U-G-G etc...

And those clothes he wears...

Well, I think the clothes are all of a pattern with the language

and intended to have the same effect.

Oh, but he was an adorable baby.

Well, according to his picture in last Sunday's paper,

the Cheviot murderer was an adorable baby.

Jane, you're not serious!

No, no, but I'm just trying to account for the young woman's presence here.

And Basil Blake does have parties, you know.

Remember last year? Cars roaring through at all times of the night.

Yes, but I expect that was those film people, Jane, you know.

Well, doesn't he bring down a young woman most weekends now?

A blonde?

A platinum blonde?

All right, miss.

Just tell Colonel Bantry my people will be closing off the library...

Oh, dear. Splendid, Slack. The young lady will show you where.

All right, lads, follow the young lady. Come on, Fletcher, Pringle, get a move on.

Come on, lad! We haven't got all day!

Preliminaries shouldn't take very long, sir. I'll report shortly.

- Yes, I'll speak to you later. - Right, sir.

Who is that?

Inspector Slack. Highly inappropriate name.

- Gives me a headache. - Right, gentlemen. Usual procedure.

Don't touch anything until I've had a good shifty myself.

Then you can get going with your box brownies.

I still think it might be helpful if you could tell me

your movements last night.

My movements?

Well, it might throw up some little detail

you didn't think you'd noticed.

Oh, very well. Where shall I begin?

Did you dine at home?