Soldiers of Fortune

OK, Miss Mike, you're in.

Watch your ass.

Definitely Taliban presence here.

Not a lot, but they're here. Over.

If you see Bin Laden, you can give him a big New York kiss.

Then chop his nuts off.

- You can wear them as earrings. - Roger that.

Some old guy is making eyes at me.

Goddamn. I can't see anything out of this.

You should bring that outfit back to the States, you can wear it again for Halloween.

Yeah. Next time, you're wearing the dress.

Craig, I have got a problem with the old guy.

Take it easy.

He's not taking his eyes off me.

This guy knows. I think he knows.

Hang in there, Mike.

Control, we have an unexpected visitor. Request positive ID. Over.

- Go. - Yes, sir.

Visitor is a friendly VIP.

Repeat, visitor is a CIA contractor. Abort mission. Over.

This is not good.

Craig, do you read? I am in deep shit, man.

The old man's ratting me out.

Did you get that?

Captain McCenzie, do you understand me?

You are to abort this mission.

Mike. Mike.

Mike, if you're in trouble and you can't speak, just cough.

What the hell are you doing here, soldier?

Where's the rest of your unit?

Listen, these rag heads would love to slit your throat.

Now, I need to know how many of you there are and what you're doing here.

So I can try to save your necks.

You just don't get it, do you?

Let me spell it out to you.

I work for CIA.

Now I cannot allow one lost soldier to compromise my entire operation.

Hmm?

OK, your choice.

You know what I think, soldier?

I think you are dressed like a woman because secretly you don't want to be a man.

Huh?

Captain McCenzie, your orders are to stand down.

You are not to...

Now, when I am done cutting you...

...these boys will finish making a woman of you.

Boy, am I glad to see you.

Craig.

- Hey. Yeah. - Hey.

You all right?

Oh, man.

My wife is going to be relieved.

But control is going to cut your balls off, man.

That guy was CIA.

Seems to me, you party with the devil, God ain't ever going to help you.

Come on, let's go.

I am all in.

Come on, let's see what you got.

How about you give me a loan and hold on to my bike as collateral?

When are you going to learn, soldier? You're out of luck, not cash.

I have never seen anyone unluckier than you.

So how did you get out of the army alive, anyway?

You know what they say, "Lucky in war, unlucky in life."

So how about the loan?

There you go, soldier. A nation's grateful thanks.

Ah.

Until the end of the month.

Deal.

All right, hands on the table. Nobody move. Hey.

Cool it, kid. What's the problem?

The problem?

Two aces of spades?

It's just a silly mistake.

You stacked the deck, Tony?

I let you win every once in a while.

Hey.

Didn't you hear what my friend said?

Put your hands on the table.

Trust me. This is not the way you want to resolve this.

Shut up, all right?

You think you can cheat us like your loser buddy over here?

We're taking the money.

Look, kid, just take the money and get the hell out of here.

Cecilia, give them your purse.

All right, put the money in the bag.

Jeez.

All right, you're next, cowboy. Your turn.

Put the money in the bag. Put the money in the bag.

All of it.

All of it.

You can put the gun down now.

It's only loaded with blanks.

Really? Let's check.

You really want me to pull this trigger?

- Let her go, McCenzie. - Whoa. Whoa. Hey.

What the hell is going on?

What the hell is going on?

They hired stunt guys.

They want to do business with you.

Just wanted to see if you still had it in you, soldier.

Captain McCenzie, we need a man like you.

Well, I don't need you. All I want is my loan.

Thanks for the show.

Crazy.

We will do it your way, Sister. Trust me, little brother.

Hey.

- Cheers. - Yeah.

So, what do you think they wanted?

Well, there's only one thing I am good at.

Mmm.

You know, Craig.

I am so broke, man.

I am willing to do whatever it takes to make some money.

Anything. The banks... The fucking banks already took everything, you know?

There's no work here, man. There's...

...nothing for a man with a dishonorable service record.

We both fought for our country, Mike, and we got nothing for it.

Yeah.

Maybe now we need to start fighting for some money.

Some of the guys from the old unit are pulling in loads of cash as mercs in Mexico.

And then...

Hey.

Hey, baby.

What are you doing up?

It's not me who can't sleep, Daddy.

It's Winston.

Come on, darling. Let's get Winston back to bed.

Look at that, look at what your nuts made.

I saved those nuts.

Yes. Good night, Daddy. Good night, Craig.

- Good night, guys. - Good night.

Come on, up the stairs you go.

You love Joanna and Elize?

Of course.

Then forget about fighting.

We will find some other way to make some money.

I have got about two more weeks before the banks change the locks on my doors.

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We offer the ultimate in bragging rights.

The best part is, it's all tax deductible.

Sons of bitches.

Would you knock it off? I am trying to sleep.

Good morning.

Have you had breakfast yet?

I am warning you, you're wasting your time.

Sit down, Craig.

How's business? Slow?

Thriving.

Now...

Whoa. Nice.

So how's your brother's beak?

- Who told you Ernesto is my brother? - Well...

Thank you.

How did you find me, the Yellow Pages?

I know almost everything about you.

Captain Craig James McCenzie.

Twenty-three special ops, and not one soldier dead under your command.

- Sir? - You were a legend.

And then you were court-martialed for insubordination and unbecoming conduct.

That's old news. And...

...dishonorably discharged.

No, no, no, there's nothing dishonorable

about saving your best friend's testicles.

Your unit was disbanded in disgrace.

I can just imagine how many people told you thanks for that.

Just one guy, and his wife. That's plenty for me.

Look, thank you for the breakfast, but I got some things I got to do.

You lost everything because of this man.

Carter Mason.

All right, look, no more games. Who the hell do you work for?

We're not playing games.

We need your help. And you need the money.

Your friend, Captain Reed, needs it.

I am through with fighting.

That's good. Because we don't need you to kill anybody,

we need you to make sure nobody gets killed.

You want me to protect him?

No, we need you to protect some people from him.

And this man is Colonel Lupo.

Nice casting.