All Those Small Things

Good evening, dearest.

My name is Jonathan Robbins, and we're here this evening

to play In It for a Minute, the UK's literary based quiz show.

In It For a Minute!

Let's meet our contestants. Michael, where are you from?

Today's champion, Douglas.

In it For a minute with me, Jonathan Robbins.

Me, Jonathan Robbins.

Jonathan Robbins in Hemingway's The Old Man and the Sea.

Goodbye.

Today, everybody, I'm witnessed yet another episode of In It For a Minute.

Good bye, everyone.

Great show as usual, Mr. Robbins.

Kind of on autopilot at this point.

Ah, Jonathan.

- Congratulations. - Well, you never wonder down on set.

Nice work, Jonathan.

Come to fire me?

The view is better on the 20th floor.

I wouldn't worry about trying to convince Nicky here that you

spend your time in the office.

OK, that's much better.

Thank you.

How's that young girl you brought to Stanley's party a couple of weeks ago?

She was very bright.

Big university plans, I imagine.

Very, very funny, Jonathan. Very funny.

Well, if she's still around next spring

and you want to impress her, why don't you shut her down to my box floors.

I think I'd prefer my own box at Stamford Bridge, thank you very much.

Well, remind me.

Is it still Russian money making you a decent side?

Or have you sold your soul to the sheikhs? Like city?

I would take your comment seriously

if I thought you cared at all about football.

I can't be blamed for preferring a gentleman's game.

Yes.

It was cricket, I was as antiquated as you are.

Oh, very clever.

All right, listen.

I've just been off with your bloody lawyers.

Give this for them.

At least they're polite while I'm being shafted.

It's a closed deal.

- Congratulations on another season. - Very good.

That makes it what?

It's your 40th season.

I'd love to do that.

God, I must have... I need that call sheet.

Yes. I dare say you're right.

And, well, don't think we're not grateful. We are.

What is the gift for that sort of milestone?

I imagine you'll be getting me something very expensive.

- 40th anniversary is a ruby. - Ruby.

You sign it.

Yes, I'll have my assistant get you a box of chocolates, I think.

From the heart, as always.

Nicky, could you email a copy of it to my assistant?

Too long in the trenches.

The smell of bitter breakfast tea and stale cigarette smoke down here.

Again.

See you again soon.

40 years. Incredible, Jonathan.

You must still have been in nappies when I coasted into my 20s.

But we can't slow down now.

It will be an absolute travesty to lose out to the bloody Americans.

You know, we invented the game show.

- Is that so? - Yeah.

Spelling bee. Absolutely ghastly.

It's only 15 minutes song.

It was first transmitted live from the BBC studios

at Gallipoli, 31st of May, 1938.

Well, let's get you changed.

Hi, Mr. Robbins.

Got your schedule and tomorrow's call sheet.

Make sure you sort out a time for me to get together with Henry O'Connor.

Old friend of mine, has been calling and calling.

I think your schedule frees up at the end of next month.

Really?

Until then?

I don't suppose you want to share a bottle of wine with me?

'76 Moldova.

That sounds amazing, but I've got to get home to Sasha.

The twins can really be a nightmare this time of night.

You are a good man, Benjamin.

Oh, there's a box of fan mail on the dining table.

I've gone through it and thrown out the junk.

Why do they all keep writing to me?

Well, you keep having fans, and thus keep getting fan mail.

I can't believe it myself.

If only they knew how much of a curmudgeon you really are.

I didn't hire you for your sense of humor. Get out of here.

I'll see you tomorrow.

- All right. - Good night.

Threw all the junk.

Very funny, Benjamin.

Well, cheers to me.

And we'll see you again the next time we play In It For a Minute.

Thank you. Bye now.

Bye everyone.

My God! The ghost returns.

- Hey, Nick. - Good to see you, stranger.

- It's been too long. - I know.

- Busier than ever. - Good of you.

So what are you having?

I kept a bottle on the back shelf just for you.

Boys are over there. I'll bring the glass around.

Cheers.

- Gentlemen. - Hello, Johnny.

I can't stay long. I have to get back to town.

Yeah, yeah. Of course.

The life of a big celebrity.

Where's Henry?

Not shagging the cleaner again, is he?

Henry died.

Oh, bollocks.

That's the worst of comedy, Michael.

It's true, Johnny.

- What happened? - Cancer.

Inoperable.

It all happened very quickly.

I know he tried to contact you several times.

He wanted to tell you himself.

When's the funeral?

It was last week.

This is what we kept calling you about.

You never returned the calls.

You should have left a message, just told me.

Well, you've known the guy for 50 years,

and it didn't seem quite the proper thing to leave a message about.

Here you go.

You heard the news about Henry, then?

Shit Everyone's got a time, I suppose.

Anyway, you have to be somewhere far more important.

We just wanted to give you the news.

We'll leave you to it.

I'm sorry.

You know that.

Yeah. Well, let's not pretend.

You've been a non friend for years.

Don't be ridiculous.

Friends don't meet each other once a year out of charity.

There have been times when there was no one else for you.

Do you remember those times?

We were there.

We were family. Henry.

Henry was family.

You should visit Henry's grave.

All Saints Church.

Pay your respects.

You don't show any respects to any of us anymore.

David.

Michael.

See you, Joe.

Should I cork that bottle?

No, bring it up.

I'll drink it.

This is where they brought you.

At least it's pretty here.

I missed your funeral.

Sounds worse when you say it out loud.

Mr. Robbins.

Mr. Robbins?

On in five, sir.

Right.

Please join us next time we play In It For a Minute.

I'm not sure I can recall a moment when I've ever

been so bothered by something.

Your best friend died.

I didn't expect it to hit me this hard.

No one wants the tie.

It is not what people look forward to.

I really have been a terrible friend.

Henry did tell me that last year he missed his birthday drinks

because you was shagging some twice divorcee you just met.

Bloody hell. Sounds worse when you say it out loud.

I suppose that I am finding myself confronting mortality

that you were given to question things.

It was a summary of my life.

Is it a life well lived?

What legacy will I leave behind.

Do you think you wasted your life?

Why would you say that?

That's what most people feel in here.

They talk to me, you know.

The holy union of a bartender and his patron.

A bond of immeasurable confidentiality.

Something like that, yeah.

Confidentially, then.

Yes.

I find myself beginning to question things I haven't questioned before.

Johnny, you've lived a great life. You're rich.

You're famous. What else is there?

I'm a game show host.

You bring joy to many people.

A certain kind of joy that without you...

There will be one less game show.

That's not what I intended to do.

That was never the plan.

I just fell into it all those years ago.