The Legacy of Cloudy Falls

Dwellings have distinctive edges,

just like people, and I know this place

like a husband knows his wife,

which is to say, not as well as you'd think,

which is to say, it still manages

to keep its share of secrets from me.

There's a timing to things, I've noticed.

Divine providence?

Hmm.

Lived here 18 years now,

spend most of my time in the courtyard lately.

Sounds boring, I know, but there's enough to see

if you know what to look for.

I'll pick a couple of them to expose your way

since that's what you're after, at random,

keep it pure, like in science.

I'm a fan of science.

Fair warning, the proceedings tend to get repetitive,

what with people being reluctant to learn from past mistakes.

Gets... repetitive.

Ah, fuck!

What?

I heard screaming, is everything okay?

Everything's fine.

Came to say thanks for being

my knight in shining armor and whatnot.

Well, you said you were fine.

Yeah, but you didn't know that.

Here.

Got this.

I didn't realize they rented out your unit.

Nah, I'm just passing through. My aunt owns the building,

she lets me crash here sometimes.

They never rent that one out ever since the stabbing.

Pretty fucked, right?

She says she's superstitious. Personally, I think

she's just too cheap to shampoo the carpets.

Edwin.

Uh, Terry.

Still up, huh? Light sleeper?

Yeah, same, most smart people are.

Yeah, got a lot buzzing around.

Anyway, just wanted to say, thanks for being a decent cat,

not that I know you, but, uh...

I get a feeling sometimes.

So... tell me about you, what's your deal?

My deal?

Yeah, tell me something.

Oh, uh, I-- I don't know.

You don't know?

I'm not sure, I'm sorry.

I took a couple of sleeping pills

before you got here, and I'm afraid I'm a little groggy.

Okay, yeah, yeah, I guess I'll just get out of your hair then.

I'm sorry.

Nobody in this tiny shithole talks to anybody.

I'm sorry, that's not-- that's not--

No, I get it. You're groggy.

Some people pay more for their units than others.

It's how buildings work.

I could tell within a minute of meeting him,

he'd be willing to pay more without complaining.

And I was right.

Point being, he's not a man I'd choose to socialize with.

But he's necessary to the ecosystem.

Just a minute!

Oh, will you be needing a shampoo?

Actually, uh, that's not why I'm here.

Um, I came for--

Body hair removal?

Come on, show me how much you're working with.

Um, not that either.

Uh, house sitting?

Uh, maybe I've misunderstood.

Oh, the other thing.

Well, why didn't you say so?

Good, it's been a while.

Is it infidelity?

I really just came to inquire about prices, all that.

Um, maybe... set up a time to chat?

Well, it's best to grab me while you got me.

It's a sliding scale, we could work something out.

Come on, sit down.

Do you do a lot of private investigating?

Sure.

Do you use the no-name stuff, if you don't mind me asking?

-I'm sorry? -

That's not the most convincing stuff on the market.

No offense, it's just that

when it comes to hair color,

it's best to splurge or go au naturel.

Come on, come on, sit down.

I'll give you the once-over on the house.

Come on, sit down.

That'll give us a chance to really delve into

whatever it is that is turning you gray so young

in the first place.

You need me to locate him, in the picture over there?

I need you to locate his son.

I see her making a full recovery.

Give her love.

Bask her in positive energy.

And, um...

Light a white candle.

Okay.

But, um...

The thing is...

I don't have a dog with cancer.

And I've actually been recording this whole thing.

So, no dog?

No dog.

Well, it seems that time's escaped us.

The parlor's closed.

Anything you want to say to my followers?

I don't like being lied to in a place of spiritual worship.

That makes two of us.

I don't like your demeanor.

Okay.

I don't like your tonality.

My what?

Your verbal tonality.

You be careful, they don't like being questioned.

Powers that be don't like what you're doing.

Yet.

Niagara Falls.

A higher ratio of human being to wax figures

you'd be hard-pressed to find anywhere on Earth, I bet.

And the all-you-can-eat buffets?

Hope you like crab meat.

Not the wedding capital of the world, that's Vegas.

And not technically one of the Seven Wonders, but almost.

This place is almost a lot of things.

Like Brigit Gallow.

Her life is almost interesting.

Wait 'til you get a load of this one.

Mediocre cold reader with a temper.

I don't like being lied to in a place of spiritual worship.

That makes two of us.

I don't like your demeanor.

Okay.

Your tonality.

My what?

Your verbal tonality.

Archangel Sandalphon comes in.

Now he is the only archangel, along with his twin,

Metatron, who was once a mortal human.

And this brings us back to the--

And the sex trafficking ring is being run

out of the back of, get this,

a chain of taco trucks in Des Moines.

And if the taco truck owners have nothing to hide,

then why'd they make their Instagram accounts private?

All of them, all of a sudden.

Shit.

Don't look.

I think that lady sits on my wife's board.

Don't look.

Brigit.

...to the gap between where we are

and where we want to be.

We will bridge it.

Can you see yourself bridge it?

I can see you bridge it.

I can see you, Brigit.

And they may say, send them to the gallows.

I can see you, Brigit.

Gallows.

But you and I are made of better stuff than that.

The quality of mercy is not strained.

And you and I must practice the discipline it brings us.

Um, we're here about unit 12?

We emailed earlier.

Is this a good time?

Sure. Now's good.

Come with me.

Um, what about bugs?

Do you get bed bugs?

Honestly, all the time.

What?

They're not as bad as people say, and we have the powder.

Oh, that's no good.

No, it's not, but that's life.

All buildings have them.

At least you'll have an honest super.