Recess: School's Out

Hey, how's it going, Frank?

Not so good. I can't seem to get this photon channeler working.

Well, you'd better figure it out.

The colonel wants to show the system to the top brass next month.

I know, I know.

What was that?

What's that sound out there?

It's a break-in! Erase the access code!

X-Y-4...

All clear.

Neatly done, Fernlick.

- It's, uh, Fenwick, sir. - Oh.

- Are they dead? - No, sir. Merely unconscious.

Good, good. You know how I hate violence.

Mmm. Nice shine.

- Uh, what next, sir? - Well, obviously, we establish our base.

- And where will that be? - The last place on Earth they'd look.

A place called... 3rd Street School.

Last day of school sale, boys and girls.

Get your celebratory contraband right here.

Shaving cream, T.P., goofy string, maps of the teachers' houses.

I'll take one of them maps, Hustler Kid.

Hey, Diggers, let's party.

Can't now. Gotta finish filling up our holes before the end of the day.

Won't be able to dig 'em up next year if we don't fill 'em now.

Hey! Big kids bury me!

Oops.

I, King Bob, in my last official act before entering middle school,

hereby anoint this boy here King Freddie the Second.

May you boss around all of the kids with fairness.

The king has graduated! Long live the king!

Elbow up! Eyes forward!

You call that kazoo playing?

- Ah, ceremony. - I'm, like, moved, Ashley A.

Say what you want about their personal lives, Ashley Q.

The royals have such style.

Keep 'em comin'! Let's go!

Ms. Finster, the kids are practically mad with last-day-of-school fever!

Of course they are, Randall. They're animals living by pure instinct.

I've got a list of infractions a mile long:

The Diggers hit a water main,

- the kindergarteners are feasting on paste, - Never mind, Randall.

Hustler Kid is, uh... Did you say "never mind"?

That's right, Randall. What I've got here is bigger, much bigger.

All this year I've been holding back on the ice cream, hiding it from all those little savages.

Just look at it, Randall. I'm counting 100, maybe 200 cases of it.

What are you going to do with all those ice creams?

Sell 'em back to the district, of course.

Think of all the chalk and erasers we can get.

But, Ms. Finster, I've got dirt on everybody.

Well, everybody except Detweiler and his pals.

Come to think of it, I haven't seen those guys anywhere.

Ah, forget about 'em, Randall.

There's nothing T.j. Detweiler and his hooligan friends can do to stop me now.

Well, that should do it. There's enough here for everyone.

Good. Then it's party time.

Kids of the playground!

I give you ice cream!

Pull!

- Ice cream! - Choco-pops! - Fudge bars!

Fudgsicle!

My ice cream!

Stop it! Stop it, I say!

You little monsters are in trouble now!

- just wait'll Principal Prickly finds out about this! -Attention, students!

- This is Principal Prickly talking. - Ooh, that was fast.

Some of you may have noticed ice cream on the playground.

I will not stand for this. This ice cream should be eaten immediately.

Huh?

In addition, I want you all to ignore Ms. Finster, no matter what she says...

about ice cream or anything else.

This can't be happening.

Furthermore, I want to inform you all that I have a fat, saggy butt...

which I like to scratch every hour on the hour.

Also, I want to apologize to all of you...

for being such a mean principal, taking away hall passes, giving guys recess detention,

refusing to accept sick notes just 'cause it doesn't look like a guy's mom's signature,

making kids stand at the wall for ten whole minutes, with no break!

Man, I feel ashamed of myself for all the terrible, rotten things I've done.

And next year, I promise to...

Why, Principal Prickly, sir, what a surprise.

Why do you do this to me, Detweiler? Do you enjoy tormenting me?

Do you hate me?

On the contrary, sir, I have the utmost respect for you.

Don't be smart with me, boy. All year long you've been pushing me, testing me.

- I don't know what you mean, sir. - Oh, really?

How about the time you convinced the F.B.I. I was a Chinese agent and got me arrested?

You were giving us a speech on personal hygiene. You had to be stopped.

How about the time you forged my signature and ordered a motorboat for the school?

It was for the kindergarteners. Owning a boat's always been kind of a dream of theirs.

I've had enough of your pranks. This time I'm really gonna throw the book at you.

With all due respect, sir, you'd better get throwing, 'cause you're out of time.

- Huh? - It's the last day of school, sir.

I've only got 20 more seconds of fourth grade left. Look.

In some ways, people, this day is a bummer for me.

But in other ways it's the ultimate high,

because every milestone that you kids pass is another step towards...

- Uh, Miss Grotke? - Yes, Spinelli?

I don't mean to interrupt, but...

Oh, yes! Be my guest.

Six, five, four, three, two, one...

- Whoo! - Whoo-hoo!

Yeah!

Scandalous!

Calling out around the world Are you ready for a brand-new beat

- Summer's here - You eat paste! You eat paste!

And the time is right for dancin'in the street

Hey! No running in the halls!

Yeah, what's the big deal? It's just the end of the school year.

The end of the school year? - Whoo-hoo!

It doesn't matter what you wear

- Whoo-hoo! - Just as long as you are there

Girls, what shall we do with the rest of this corn chowder?

Aw, leave it in the kettle. It'll keep till September.

- - They'll be dancing Dancing in the street

- They're dancin'in the street - Dancing in the street

See you next year, Principal Prickly.

You'd better do some growing up this summer, young man.

I hate my job.

There'll be laughin' singin'

And records playin'

Dancin'in the street

Look at those hooligans.

Actually, I think it's a wonderful expression of freedom and joy.

I'll tell you a wonderful expression of freedom and joy.

Twelve weeks of nothing but me at the West Side Golf Course, and no Detweiler.

I second that emotion, sir.

Man, Teej, that prank was sweet.

Yeah, you should've seen Finster's face... I thought she was gonna blow a gasket.

Those limesicles were tasty.

A tasty beginning to a tasty summer.

Twelve weeks of nothing but riding bikes, hanging out at the lake...

and T.P.-ing the West Side Golf Course.

Summer vacation... The ultimate recess.

Yeah, I can't wait to get to baseball camp.

Baseball camp? What are you talking about?

Actually, Teej, I'm gonna be out of town too.

Big-time Wrestling Federation has this training camp,

and I gotta learn some new moves if I'm ever gonna turn pro.

- But, Spinelli... - It's military camp for me.

My dad says I need to learn to be a leader.

I shall be attending the Mt. Van Buren Space Camp.

Don't wanna let those science geeks get ahead of me.

You're all going to camp?

- Not me. - Thank goodness.

The Young Voices Training Program doesn't like the word "camp."

They provide opportunities for aspiring singers to train their voices...

in a rigorous yet supportive setting.

But summer's gonna be ruined.

What am I gonna do? Play baseball by myself? Watch reruns? Read?

Sorry, man, but we gotta think about our futures.

Yeah, we can't waste the whole summer just fooling around like kids.

- But we are kids! - Actually, as of the completion of fourth grade,

we are technically considered pre-young adults.

And next year we won't even be "pre."

But...

All right, let's make the most of the time we've got left. When do you all leave?

- First thing in the morning. - Oh, man.

Well, there's my bus.

- Better get going. - Yeah, same here.

Bye, Teej. Try to have some fun, okay?

Don't worry, buddy. You'll have a great time without us.

I don't know, Vince. All my plans were made for six.

Don't tell me you Ashleys are going to baseball camp.

Eeew! As if!

Cheerleading camp is right across the lake. Duh!

I hope it's a big lake.

Ah, space camp.

Wonder if they'll let us make craters.

Hey, Hustler Kid, I didn't know you wrestled.

I don't. I'm pre-management.

Besides, my research tells me that kids who wrestle trade the most for contraband snacks.

Which reminds me... Wanna buy a Winger-Dinger?

All right, all the kindergarten performers on the bus first.

Me Viking!

Me Viking! Me Viking! Me Viking!

Bon voyage...

T.j.

Big kid sing good.

- Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah.

Well, Teej, there's my transport.

Why don't you come with? Military camp's gonna be a blast!

Griswald, you maggot, get your fanny over here now!

Thanks, Gus, but I think I'll stick it out at home this summer.

Okay, but you don't know what you're missing.

Hiya, Captain Brad!

I don't like you, Griswald. I am not your friend!

Do I make myself clear?

Yes, sir! Not looking for friendship, sir!

Good luck, Gus. You're gonna need it.

Man, this summer's gonna whomp.

One is the loneliest number

That you'll ever do

Two can be as bad as one

It's the loneliest number since the number one

No is the saddest experience

You'll ever know

Yes, it's the saddest experience

You'll ever know

'Cause one is the loneliest number