Parks and Recreation

OKAY, AS EVERYBODY KNOWS,

THE SPIRIT OF PAWNEE WAS DEFACED AGAIN LAST NIGHT.

WHAT WAS IT THIS TIME?

- CHOCOLATE PUDDING. - HUH. THAT'S NEW.

THE MURAL THAT NORMALLY RESIDES HERE

IS CALLED THE SPIRIT OF PAWNEE,

AND IT'S VERY CONTROVERSIAL.

WE'VE HAD SOMEONE THROW ACID AT IT, TOMATO SAUCE.

SOMEONE TRIED TO STAB IT ONCE.

WE REALLY NEED BETTER SECURITY HERE.

WE ALSO NEED... BETTER, LESS-OFFENSIVE HISTORY.

- SO THE CITY COUNCIL HAS DECIDED

THAT THE SPIRIT OF PAWNEE SHOULD BE CHANGED

TO SOMETHING JUST A LITTLE LESS HORRIFYING.

NOW SINCE THE MURALS WERE MADE BY GOVERNMENT EMPLOYEES

BACK IN THE 1930s,

WE THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE FUN IF EACH DEPARTMENT

SUBMITTED THE DESIGN FOR A NEW MURAL...

AND YOU'LL SUBMIT YOUR CONCEPTS TOMORROW AFTERNOON.

ALL RIGHTY, FOLKS? THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

- UH, LESLIE, WHAT'S YOUR DESIGN GONNA BE?

A TREE?

JOE, YOU WORK IN SEWAGE.

YOUR DEPARTMENT LITERALLY SPECIALIZES IN CRAP.

YOU REALLY WANNA DO THIS? - I TOLD YOU BEFORE.

CRAP IS A SLANG TERM, AND I DON'T LIKE THAT TERM.

BUT AT LEAST WE DON'T SPECIALIZE IN LOSING...LIKE YOU GUYS.

SEWAGE, LET'S ROLL.

DAMN!

HOW DOES SEWAGE ALWAYS GET THE HOTTEST INTERNS?

*

- GUYS, THIS DEPARTMENT HAS THE CHANCE

TO DESIGN SOMETHING THAT COULD BE IN THIS BUILDING FOREVER.

THIS COULD BE OUR LEGACY.

- I THOUGHT BUILDING A PARK ON LOT 48

WAS GONNA BE OUR LEGACY.

- WELL, YOU CAN HAVE TWO LEGACIES.

LOOK AT MADONNA-- GREAT SINGER, AMAZING ARMS.

LOOK AT O.J. SIMPSON--

HEISMAN TROPHY WINNER, NAKED GUN.

- MM-HMM. - NO OFFENSE, LESLIE,

BUT I'M NOT AN ARTIST. - OH, THAT'S NOT TRUE, DONNA.

I'VE SEEN YOUR FINGERNAILS. - I PAY SOMEONE TO DO THIS.

REALLY? OH. WELL...

SHOOT. ANYWAY...

I'M ORDERING ALL OF YOU TO DESIGN A MURAL.

- AH...ONLY RON CAN ORDER THE WHOLE DEPARTMENT

TO DO SOMETHING.

- RON, ORDER THEM TO DO THIS. - DO WHATEVER LESLIE SAYS.

- HA HA! OKAY. SO HERE ARE YOUR SUPPLIES.

I WANT YOU TO GO AND FIND THE SPIRIT OF PAWNEE

AND MAKE ME A SKETCH.

AND IT NEEDS TO BE BREATHTAKING AND MOVING AND HISTORICAL

AND BETTER THAN EVERY DEPARTMENT,

AND YOU HAVE ONE HOUR.

DESIGNERS, MAKE IT WORK.

TIM GUNN.

- YOU, MY FRIEND, ARE READY TO GO DANCING.

THANK YOU, SIR.

ALL RIGHT, NEXT.

- ANDREW, LOOKING GOOD. BUSINESS IS BOOMING.

- YEAH. HEY, RON, HOW ABOUT YOU?

NEED A LITTLE DOG WAXIN'?

IT'S ONLY 5 BUCKS, AND I'LL LET YOU CUT IN FRONT OF THIS GUY.

- WHAT? - COME ON, BEAT IT.

THIS IS RON SWANSON WE'RE TALKING ABOUT.

I'M IMPRESSED WITH ANDY.

PULLING HIMSELF UP BY HIS BOOTSTRAPS.

REMINDS ME OF ME.

I GOT MY FIRST JOB WHEN I WAS NINE.

WORKED AT A SHEET METAL FACTORY.

IN TWO WEEKS, I WAS RUNNING THE FLOOR.

CHILD LABOR LAWS ARE RUINING THIS COUNTRY.

- DO YOU HAVE A KEY IN YOUR SHOE?

- NO, NO, I HAVE A BUNION THAT'S PRACTICALLY ITS OWN TOE.

NORMALLY, THE PAIN HOWLS THROUGH MY LOAFERS

LIKE A BANSHEE ON THE MOORS,

BUT...FOR THESE PAST THREE MINUTES,

IT'S BEEN REDUCED TO A FAINT GROWL.

OKAY.

THAT WAS NEAT.

WELL, HEY. WE ARE ALL FINISHED.

WELL...

WHOO. THAT WAS GREAT.

- THANK YOU, SON. - NO SWEAT!

NEXT!

- SHOULDN'T LET YOUR FRIENDS CUT IN LINE.

IT'S NOT GOOD BUSINESS.

- YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE ISN'T GOOD BUSINESS?

THAT GUY'S MY FRIEND.

- RIGHT. I'M SAYING...

YOU SHOULDN'T LET YOUR FRIENDS CUT IN LINE.

- ALL RIGHT. SORRY, KYLE.

HERE, GIVE ME THIS.

NEXT!

- SO WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR EXACTLY?

I DON'T KNOW, MAN.

THE SPIRIT OF PAWNEE. THAT'S ALL I GOT.

HERE. JUST GIMME $20 WORTH OF ART.

JUST SOMETHING THAT SEEMS PERSONAL

THAT ONLY I COULD HAVE DONE.

- WELL, TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF. - NO. JUST PAINT.

I HAVE NO INTEREST IN ART. LET ME CLARIFY.

I HAVE NO INTEREST IN NON-NUDE IMAGES.

DUDE, WHAT THE HELL KIND OF ART IS THIS?

LOOKS LIKE A LIZARD PUKING UP SKITTLES!

I'M AN ABSTRACT EXPRESSIONIST.

NO, YOU'RE A CON ARTIST,

AND I'M A GUY THAT'S OUT 20 BUCKS.

UGH. WHATEVER.

I'M A TERRIBLE ARTIST.

BUT THE PARKS DEPARTMENT HAS DONE SO MUCH FOR ME

THAT IF I CAN HELP THEM OUT IN ANY WAY, I WILL.

OH, GOD.

MAYBE I SHOULD JUST GIVE THEM ALL FREE FLU SHOTS.

- I KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS TOWN

AND THESE MURALS,

AND THAT'S WHY THIS IS A DREAM COME TRUE--LITERALLY.

I HAVE HAD A DREAM WHERE I DESIGNED A MURAL.

BUT THEN IT TURNED INTO A NIGHTMARE

BECAUSE THE MURAL STARTED TALKING,

AND IT CAME ALIVE, AND IT WAS WHISPERING,

AND I COULDN'T HEAR WHAT IT WAS SAYING,

SO I LEANED IN CLOSE, AND THEN IT ATE ME.

AT ONE POINT, GINA GERSHON WAS THERE.

- MY PIECE IS TRULY GOING TO CAPTURE

THE SPIRIT OF PAWNEE.

EEW!

- NEVER UNDERSTOOD THE TERM ELBOW GREASE.

I GUESS IT'S NOT REALLY GREASE.

JUST HARD WORK.

OH, HEY, RON. NICE SHINY SHOES YOU GOT THERE.

OH, HEY, I WAS JUST, UM...

OH, NO--SHOOT.

ACTUALLY, IT LOOKS LIKE I SCUFFED THIS ONE.

- DO YOU NEED YOUR MONEY BACK, RON?

- 'CAUSE I ALREADY SPENT IT. - REALLY?

HOW DID--NEVER MIND.

UH, I THINK I'LL JUST TAKE ANOTHER FULL POLISH.

CAN I CUT IN LINE AGAIN?

- I FEEL RIGHT AT HOME AS A SHOESHINE.

I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING,

BUT I KNOW I'M DOING IT REALLY, REALLY WELL.

- OKAY, LET'S GET GOIN' WITH THE SPIRIT OF PAWNEE.

ANN, YOU GO FIRST. - OKAY.

UM...OKAY.

WELL, SINCE IT'S THE PARKS DEPARTMENT,

I THOUGHT I WOULD DESIGN A PRETTY PARK.

WITH, UH, DOGS PLAYING.

I CAN'T REALLY DRAW,

SO I JUST CUT SOME STUFF OUT OF A MAGAZINE.

- THAT LOOKS LIKE SOMETHING A DEATH ROW CONVICT

WOULD MAKE IN ART THERAPY.

DUDE, I TRIED.

AND YOU FAILED.

- IT'S DOGS AND PEOPLE PLAYING IN A PARK.

- IT'S CUTE! - IT'S OKAY, SWEETHEART.

YOU CAN'T MAKE ART BECAUSE YOU ARE ART.

YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL... BUT THAT SUCKS.

OKAY. LET'S SEE YOURS!

- FINE. MINE IS AMAZING. IT'S GONNA BLOW YOUR MIND.

OKAY. SOME PROFESSIONAL-ASS ART RIGHT HERE.

- I'M NOT QUITE SURE WHAT I'M LOOKING AT.

IT'S ABSTRACT, LESLIE.

OVER HERE, YOU GOT SOME SHAPES.

AND THEN YOU COME OVER TO THIS SIDE...

YOU KNOW, IT'S ACTUALLY KIND OF INTERESTING.

EACH SHAPE IS ITS OWN THING...

BUT THEN WHEN IT COMES TOGETHER,

IT REALLY GIVES YOU A SENSE OF...

COMPLETION.

HMM.

A PIECE OF ART CAUSED ME TO HAVE AN EMOTIONAL REACTION.

IS THAT NORMAL?

SO IT'S THE LAST SUPPER

BUT WITH FAMOUS PEOPLE FROM INDIANA.

JOHN MELLANCAMP, LARRY BIRD,

MICHAEL JACKSON,

DAVID LETTERMAN, VIVICA A. FOX.

OKAY, SO HERE'S WHERE IT GETS A LITTLE DICEY,

'CAUSE THERE'S NOT THAT MANY CELEBRITIES FROM INDIANA,

SO, UM, A NASCAR,

MY FRIEND BECKY, RON SWANSON, UH...

- DONNA? WHO'S THE JESUS?

THAT WOULD BE GREG KINNEAR.

- I DIDN'T KNOW HE WAS FROM INDIANA.

- YEAH, YOU KNOW, I READ THAT HE WAS.

- DO YOU THINK HE'S THE BEST CHOICE FOR JESUS?

I MEAN, HE WAS GREAT ON ER...

- GREG KINNEAR WASN'T IN ER. - YEAH, HE WAS.

I DON'T THINK THAT HE WAS.

WHO AM I THINKING OF?

OKAY. NEXT.

WOW. REALLY GOOD, JERRY.

FOR MY MURINAL,

I WAS INSPIRED BY THE DEATH OF MY GRANDMA--

- YOU SAID "MURINAL."

- NO, I DIDN'T. - YES, YOU DID.

YOU SAID "MURINAL." I HEARD IT.

- ANYWAY, SHE-- - JERRY...