Milo Murphy’s Law

So, we're supposed to pick a career today?

The job that we're gonna have for the rest of our lives? Today?

When I was little, I wanted to be a journalist.

Or, queen of the universe.

You know, only one of those is actually a career.

When I was little, I wanted to be a robot.

And that's not a career at all.

Also, none of those are on the list.

But, what if I wanna be an ophthalmic laboratory technician?

An optha what now?

They make prescription eye glasses and contact lenses.

Milo, do you actually want to be an optha...

An ophthalmic laboratory technician. And, no.

But, maybe, I don't know. What if I wanna do all these things?

I have to decide today?

I already did. Here, I wrote it in.

Journalist slash queen of the universe.

Now, it's a career.

And some of these don't even sound like real jobs.

Animator? I think it's a typo.

But, what if that is a real job?

How will I ever decide?

Welcome, children. Our next Career Day speaker is Milo's father, Mr. Murphy.

Hi, kids.

Mr. Murphy is going to tell us what the city's Safety Inspector does.

Mr. Murphy. Come on, Dad, wow us.

As the city's key Safety Inspector,

most of my job is just to show up.

When I'm around, anything that can go wrong, tends to.

And therefore, whatever safety precautions are in effect,

will be tested to the limit.

So, what are the odds of something going wrong, while we're here?

Are you kidding? Milo, his father in the same place.

Fan blades, water pipes...

14:1. Really?

So, you wanna piece of that action?

Can I get another hard hat?

And over here is the aeration tank.

It's kinda like a huge dish washer.

We should get one of those for our house.

Sure would help with. How did your mother put it?

The pile of hate in the sink?

She's got a way with words.

Diogee, How did you get in here?

Diogee, go home.

You heard him boy. On your way.

Yes! So, burgers or Mexican food?

First, we need to complete our mission.

Which is quite simple, actually.

All we have to do is, make sure that, that truck filled with pistachios,

gets from A to B.

Literally from A Street, right here, where we are now,

to the pistachio warehouse on B Street.

Then we can think about lunch.

And when we think about it, it will be Chinese.

You know what we should get?

We should get breakfast burritos.

That's breakfast inside of a lunch.

Which is my very objection.

Huh, here's a job called middle management.

Though, I'm not sure why middles need to be managed.

Me neither. I've never seen an unruly middle.

Just wait till you get to my age, boys.

I don't get it. Any way.

Up here we have a real tree. A drinking water supply hose

that looks a little like George Washington.

Don't worry, guys, I got just the thing.

A snowman, really?

Hey, the raft is being repaired.

Hey, snowman is an island.

Come, there's room for everyone.

- Oh, no! - Diogee, go home!

Don't worry, kids, we'll be fine

once the high pressure water vents open.

All right, there's the driver, they're on the move. Let's go.

Hurry!

I should not have eaten all those wax lips.

How can you be so out of shape?

You're wearing a track suit.

Well, you're wearing a top hat, how can you be so...

I don't know, out of rabbits... Hmph.

Oh, no! The truck.

Whoa!

Do you get it? Out of rabbits.

'Cause you look like a magician... I get it...

Hey gather this, I'm literally riding your coat tail.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

It's the same thing every time.

If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself.

Excuse me. young man, your boss told me to tell you

that he wants me to drive this truck, to the warehouse on B Street.

Mr. Roberson said that?

Yes, he also told me to tell you this... Ow! Ow!

Come on, Dakota.

Yeah, yeah, I'm way ahead of you.

Well, looks like I get the afternoon off.

Well, the water venting system seems to be working.

But, you're gonna wanna check the stability of the cat walk.

And...

You're gonna want to replace this T-bolt.

Okay, Diogee, now you should go home.

Well, Safety Inspector is an exciting job.

Yeah, I guess so.

Which doesn't really narrow it down for me.

What am I gonna do?

There are only two more stops.

Come on kids.

Time to visit Melissa's father at the fish hatchery.

Your father works at a fish hatchery?

Yeah, I thought he was a fireman.

He is. The fish hatchery is probably on fire.

Well, the fire's out and the fish are safe.

Oh yeah, that reminds me, Milo, you weren't here

at the fish hatchery, this morning, were you?

- Dad! - I kid.

But seriously, you weren't here, right?

Oh, Mr. Chase, I'm flattered, but no.

Okay, report finished.

Who'd like a practice run with the hose?

I would. Who knows, I might wanna be a fireman.

Wait a minute, Milo, a fireman?

He said "might," Dad.

But... How do I turn this thing...

Just breathe.

Whoa!

Christmas trees for sale.

Get ahead of the Christmas run.

Christmas trees for...

Hurry, they're going fast, get them while... Oh, forget it!

So, we finally put out the fire.

And no one had anything to eat since that morning,

so we stopped to buy some hot dogs,

and then Burt goes, "Hey, we should just start..."

Sorry, Chief, we're on it.

Whoa!

Well, Milo, you're the first person in history

to ever start a fire, with water.

Thanks.

Not really a compliment.

There, B Street, was that so hard?

So, we're taking the pistachios to a steak sandwich place?

This is supposed to be a pistachio storage facility.

You know what we should get? We should get a steak sandwich

that's dinner inside of a different lunch.

I don't understand, this is B Street. Yeah. Let me see that.

Oh, here's your problem, we're supposed to be on B Street South.

That's clear on the other side of town.

We're on B Street North, see.

That's what this little S means.

B Street South.

If it was an 'N' it would be B Street North. But, this is an S.

I get it.

And our final stop for Career Day

is with Zack's mom, Dr. Underwood.

Hi, Zack's mom.

Please, just call me Dr. Zack's mom.

Did you always know, you wanted to be a doctor, Dr. Zack's mom?

Milo, are you thinking about becoming a doctor?

Yeah, maybe.

I've always wondered what it was like

on the other side of the bandage.

What's your specialty, Dr. Zack's mom?

The really bloody stuff.

- Cool! - Yeah...

But, since I can't show you that,

how about I show you the state of the art MRI machine?

Uh, Mr. Draco?

I'll need you to put your arms at your sides.

Not crossed over your chest like that.

Are you sure?

This feel's so unnatural.

I'm sure. Well, you're the professional.

Now, this is where we monitor the Magnetic Resonance Imaging.

Or MRI for short. Cool.

Let me see... Quit pushing.

Okay, kids, let's give you and this a little bit more space.

The MRI is basically a giant magnet...

It controls a very...

Um, so, technically we're never supposed to put that lever up to 10.

Oops, my bad, I'll uncross my arms.

I should just leave.

Okay, who wants to see the emergency exit?

I do.

How did you fit an anchor in your back pack?

You don't know everything about me.

Hey!

Who stole my door?

We're finally free!

Yeah, I'm gonna be working late, so leave me some leftover.

Never mind. I'll be there in 20 minutes...

Uh-oh. This can't be good.

Oh, so this is why they wanted me

to keep my arms on my sides. Wait!

Why did they leave this window open?

So, hospital food it is.

That's lunch, inside of a hospital.

Hey, Mr. Hartunian.

How do you like, being a bus driver?

How do you like to sit down?

I like it just fine, thanks.