Batman and Harley Quinn

Look out!

Hey! Trying to work here!

Perhaps you could work a little faster.

Perhaps if you hadn't tripped the damn alarm.

Pamela, we are out of time! The police will be here soon.

Or worse...

Batman. I know, I know!

But it's like trying to find a needle in a- Haystack.

Come on, come on.

Bingo.

Nothing was physically stolen.

Obviously.

There was no effort to minimize collateral.

This was about information.

There's no way Poison Ivy could've accessed S.T.A. R. Labs secure data.

- They're- - Got it.

Here's the file they copied.

Looks like this is the only thing they cared about.

Oh, no.

"Holland. "

Holland...

Why does that sound so familiar?

Be my guest.

Alec Holland was working on a bio-restorative formula

to turn deserts into forests.

Until a saboteur's bomb destroyed that dream.

His body engulfed in the burning experimental compound,

Holland tried to douse the flames.

The chemicals reacted with the surrounding bayou.

His entire physiognomy changed.

- Holland was transformed into- - Swamp Thing.

That's it! That's what attacked me!

Not quite.

This is Jason Woodrue, AKA the Floronic Man.

Terrific.

Poison Ivy teaming up with Jason Woodrue.

We're in for a ride.

I see two immediate objectives.

If you'll excuse us.

A, figure out what Ivy and Woodrue are up to.

And B, find out where the Green Team is hiding out.

I'll take A. I have a hunch I need to look into.

You take B.

Check previous addresses, known associates...

Oh, crap.

Right.

We need Harley Quinn.

Last I heard, Harley went off the grid after she got out on parole.

No one's heard a thing since.

Rumor is she's gone "straight," but also just plain gone.

No one disappears without a trace.

Someone knows something.

Someone always does.

It's just a matter of shaking the right tree.

Hey, thanks again for helping us out with that League of Assassins thing

in Nanda Parbat.

That Lady Shiva...

Wouldn't say no to a slice of that pie, know what I mean?

So, what can I do for you, Batman?

Lot going on today, but I can spare a few minutes.

A man was abducted from his home two days ago.

Harold Goldblum.

Stupid hand.

Henderson!

How do you even know about that?

We've got a total media lockdown.

Let's just say I've got eyes and ears everywhere, Sarge.

Hacking the A. R.G. U.S. computer is a federal crime, Batman.

Goldblum is a former professor of chemistry at Metropolis University.

Spent 15 years heading up GothCorp Chemical's R&D division.

Most recently, he's been working for the NSA,

specializing in biological warfare.

He was their top mind in biology, botany and toxicology.

I need to know what he was working on.

That'll be all, Henderson.

Right, Sarge.

Big fan.

I'm sorry, Batman, that's classified.

My hands are tied.

Strange that you would put it just that way.

Why?

A fringe hacker group recently accessed information

about key A. R.G. U.S. employees.

Some of them seemed to be engaged in, shall we say,

questionable nocturnal activities.

Are you blackmailing me?

I'm explaining that I can help stop a crime in exchange for some information.

Fine.

But for the record, what Mistress Ilsa does for me is considered therapy.

In some countries.

It's an odd case. No ransom demands, political requests, nothing.

He just vanished.

Whoever took the guy, they either killed him,

or they're keeping him alive for reason or reasons unknown.

- Any leads? - Nothing viable.

The investigation is at a dead end.

Goldblum's field of expertise

is man-made pandemic terrorist attacks.

Anthrax, Ebola, flesh-eating bacteria... You know.

Yes, I do.

In fact, he's the world's leading expert on the subject.

Jesus, the stuff that guy knows.

I don't mean to be callous, but part of me hopes they just killed him.

No, sorry.

Nah, man.

- No. - Haven't seen her.

Would've liked to.

Dame owes me three weeks back rent!

If you find her, you tell her she can eat my-

She had the cutest smile.

Morty! That was your niece, Irene!

Always saying she looks like this Harley Quinn,

but I don't see it.

And an adorable tuckus!

Morty!

Hasn't been around.

Afraid not, my son.

- Lo siento. - Can I have that picture?

It was at that deli on Third Street.

Morty! That was two years ago!

In Miami!

I could go for a Reuben myself about now.

With extra kraut.

Hang on...

Okay, we got one Power Girl jumbo combo,

one Black Canary leg-and-thigh with coleslaw...

Gonna lose that hand, puddin'.

Anything else for you today, boys?

- No. - I'm good.

Yeah, me too.

Totally good.

Crazy broad broke my freakin' arm.

Hey, Chick, this crazy broad broke my freakin' arm!

Gotta be her.

Come on out, I know you're there.

I got good ears.

Your hearing gets mighty sharp in Arkham.

Things go bump in the night.

Hi, Harley. Long time no see.

I'd like to keep it that way.

You're a hard girl to find.

Pretty clever, hiding in plain sight like that.

I have a few questions.

For example, where can I find your BFF Poison Ivy?

We need your help.

- Ivy is- - Save it, honey.

I don't mix it up with the costume crowd anymore.

I've turned over a new leaf, as it were.

Listen, Ivy's fallen in with the wrong crowd.

She and Jason Woodrue are up to something.

And we have to stop them.

They're a lethal combo, Harley.

Lots of people could get hurt or killed. Ivy could get hurt or killed.

I'm done with capes and tights and masks.

Just trying like hell to lead a normal life.

Really? Funny that you're not, say,

using your psychiatric training to make a decent living.

Instead of dressing up in skimpy red and black

for minimum wage plus tips...

Pretty weird way to kick a habit.

You've got to be just itching to get back in the game.

Nice try, but you're on your own, Nightwig.

You haven't reported to your parole officer in months.

I should just drag your crazy ass back to jail right now.

Oh, yeah?

Just freakin' try it, buttwipe!

Sorry, kiddo, but you're getting the payback

for every pinch, goose, and butt slap I've gotten for the last three months.

Give up?

Just when things are getting interesting? Fat chance!

Whiff.

Ready to call it a night, Harley?

What's so funny, Chuckles?

Some girls like mace.

I prefer a little low-grade Joker venom.

Only useful thing I ever got from that asshat.

Nighty-night, jerk.

Don't know what you expect to find.

My best people have been over this place a dozen times.

No offense to your best people, but they're not me.

What is it?

Oh, yay! A leaf.

Kind of like all of these.

No, not like those.

It's a completely different phylum from every other leaf in here.

Great. You're the world's greatest florist, too.

Look closely.

Have you ever seen a leaf like this?

Can't say that I have.

That's because it isn't from our planet.

Not even from our dimension.

Wait. You mean Jason Woodrue?

That freak was here?

This is bad.

Your forensic people are bad.

This is catastrophic.

Nightwing, this is Batman. Come in.

Nightwing?

Everything okay?

He should've reported in by now.