Brilliantlove AKA The Orgasm Diaries (Brilliantlove)

OF ANGELS

YOU LEFT

IN TINFOIL

AND HASTENED AWAY

WRAPPED IN SILVER

THAT YOU CANNOT REMARK

[WIND BLOWING,

[WIND BLOWING, TRAFFIC PASSING...]

TRAFFIC PASSING...]

>> Woman on tape: Last winter...

I found a needle in a haystack.

It pricked my skin

and filled me with love.

and filled me with love. Now I'’m addicted.

Now I'’m addicted.

[WIND BLOWING,

[WIND BLOWING, TRAFFIC PASSING...]

TRAFFIC PASSING...]

TRAFFIC PASSING...]

[TRAFFIC PASSING,

[TRAFFIC PASSING, BIRDS CHIRPING...]

BIRDS CHIRPING...]

[MAN CHUCKLES SOFTLY,

[MAN CHUCKLES SOFTLY, KISSES WOMAN]

KISSES WOMAN]

[TRAFFIC PASSING,

[TRAFFIC PASSING, BIRDS CHIRPING IN DISTANCE...]

BIRDS CHIRPING IN DISTANCE...]

>> Man: WHAT DO CATS LIKE

FOR BREAKFAST?

MICE CRISPIES.

MICE CRISPIES. >> SHUT UP, YOU DICK.

>> SHUT UP, YOU DICK.

...WHEN I FIRST STARTED OUT,

TAXIDERMY WAS LIKE MAGIC.

NO OTHER TAXIDERMISTS

WOULD TELL YOU THEIR SECRETS.

THERE WERE NO BOOKS OR MANUALS,

THERE WERE NO BOOKS OR MANUALS, JUST SECRETS.

JUST SECRETS.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT "TAXIDERMY"

MEANS, MANCHESTER?

>> NO.

>> NO. >> IT MEANS "TO REARRANGE SKIN."

>> IT MEANS "TO REARRANGE SKIN."

>> CAN I HAVE A GO?

>> NO.

>> WHY?

>> BECAUSE I AM A WOMAN

AND YOU ARE AN IDIOT.

AND YOU ARE AN IDIOT.

>> HAVE YOU GOT ANYTHING TO EAT?

>> NO.

>> NO. >> I'’M STARVING.

>> I'’M STARVING.

>> I'’M STARVING.

>> Boy: DO YOU WANT TO BUY THIS?

>> NO...

BUT HOW MUCH DO YOU WANT

FOR THIS?

>> 600 POUNDS!

>> 50 PENCE.

>> O.K....

THERE YOU GO.

>> THANK YOU.

>> THANK YOU. >> THANK YOU.

>> THANK YOU.

>> WHOA...

MANCHESTER, THEY'’RE AMAZING.

>> PISS OFF, JAKE.

>> LOOK, THE TUTOR WILL BE

BACK IN A BIT AND IF HE

CATCHES YOU IN HERE AGAIN,

HE'’S GONNA FIRE ME.

>> BE DONE IN A MINUTE.

>> WELL, HOW'’S ABOUT YOU JUST

LET ME DO '’EM, RIGHT, AND I'LL

BRING THEM TO THE PUB LATER.

>> O.K....

BUT DON'’T BE WANKING

OVER MY BIRD.

OVER MY BIRD.

>> THANKS, JAKE.

>> NO WORRIES.

>> UM, DID YOU WANT

ANOTHER PINT?

>> GO ON, THEN.

>> GO ON, THEN.

>> SOMEBODY SAID HE JUST...

HE, HE FELL OVER A PRAM

IN THE PASSAGE, BUT TRULY,

I DON'’T BLAME IT ON THE BUGGY.

ANYWAY...

YOU SEE, YOU WERE EXPECTING

ONE OF THEM TERRIBLE JOKES.

YOU SEE, I'’M CLASS, MAN.

ONLY GET BETTER.

HEY, YOU'’RE TOO EASY.

WELL, THERE WAS A TIME THERE WAS

THIS BLOKE I WAS HEARING ABOUT

WHO WAS ON THE TRAIN, PUFFING

AWAY...

LITTLE OLD WOMAN SITTING NEXT TO

HIM, PULLS INTO THE STATION,

THE LITTLE OLD WOMAN PULLS OUT

A BAG, PULLS OUT THE BIBLE

FROM THE BAG...

>> Jake:

THAT STINKS.

SHE WON'’T GO NOWHERE NEAR YOU

SMELLING LIKE THAT.

>> : SHE WILL,

SHE LOVES ME.

NOON LOVES ME.

LOVES ME.

NOON LOVES ME.

>> ...FINALLY, HE'’S HAD ENOUGH,

PULLS INTO A STATION...

>> Jake: WHY IS HE STARING?

>> I'’VE GOT NOON.

: I'’VE GOT NOON.

>> "...AND WHEN WE PULL OUT

THE STATION, YOU PUT THE BIBLE

BACK IN THE BAG?"

SHE SAYS, "WHY DON'’T YOU

FUCK OFF?"

WELL...

YOU SEE, YOU DON'’T KNOW WHO'S

ON THE TRAIN THESE DAYS.

IT'’S QUESTIONS LIKE THAT

SHOULD BE ASKED.

I MEAN, HERE'’S A QUESTION, LADS,

HERE'’S YOUR QUESTION...

HERE'’S YOUR QUESTION... >>

>>

>> HELLO, NOON.

HELLO, NOON.

>> Manchester: WHOA!

>> JESUS CHRIST...

PRICK.

PRICK.

>> LEAH.

LEAH.

>> WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

>> WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? >> HAVE A LOOK AT THESE.

>> HAVE A LOOK AT THESE.

SOMEONE JUST LEFT THEM

IN THE PUB.

IN THE PUB. >> NO WAY.

>> NO WAY.