Madam Secretary

Let me try it again. Ayu-bowan.

Good, but don't forget the “U.”

Ay-u-bowan.

- Ayubowan. - I don't...

I don't get it, doesn't the Sri Lankan president speak English?

Oy.

What? Am I being culturally insensitive again?

Because I screw up with Piper, like, ten times a day.

As a matter of fact,

President Nandasiri does speak English.

But it's traditional for foreign dignitaries

to be greeted in their native tongue.

And in Sri Lanka, the primary language is?

Sinhala. Okay.

I've actually been practicing, too, just in case.

Singhala Danna naa.

Which means?

"I don't speak Sinhala."

Mom, I'm actually very surprised

that you're not delaying this trip until Dalton is reinstated.

Um, Russell told me that he's gonna be back in action

in, like, a few weeks.

Well, while the president is recuperating,

it's important for the international community

to understand that the U.S. has not missed a step.

Which means...

nothing is postponed.

But if Acting President Hurst signs off,

you're just letting her take the victory lap.

I don't get it.

You know, sometimes I worry that Russell Jackson is your mentor.

Yeah, you know, I, uh, I hate to say it,

but I think she's got a point.

I'm not crazy about the optics.

Kids, in public service

and in life, it's not about who gets the credit.

Although, I got to say, babe, that I know.

China's trying to make a deal with Sri Lanka, too,

and the fact that you beat 'em to the punch,

- that is really hot. - Yeah, yeah. You know...

- Oh, was it? - And it's, uh, it's all part

of a larger strategy to push back on their expansion

into the Indian Ocean.

Okay, clearly, I talk about work too much at home.

I'm home!

- In the kitchen! - Here. Oh, look at her.

- Hi. Aw. - Hi, guys.

- You're back. - I missed you.

Okay, you guys saw me two weeks ago.

- I don't care. - Yeah, I...

I didn't think you'd be home until, like, spring break.

I'll only be here

for a couple of days.

Yeah.

Uh, small issue with your room.

I'm actually kind of using it as a gym.

- What? - Well, you know, I'm trying to get...

swole for Piper.

- Ooh. - Gross! Do that in your own room.

No, I almost threw out my back

moving all the weights into yours.

Okay, I'm gonna let you handle this one.

All right. Come on there, Jack LaLanne.

- Let's go. - Jack La-who?

- Yeah. Come on. - Bye. Love you. Really?

Good day. Where are we on Indonesia?

They love our soybeans, we love their knitwear.

Negotiations continue apace.

The secretary's comments at the Model UN conference?

Uh, "May you continue to be more functional"

than your real-world counterpart."

In progress.

Okay, our main event today is

the Sri Lankan president, Tarindo Nandasiri,

arriving at the White House to meet with the secretary

and Acting President Hurst.

With him will be his minister of national policies

and economic affairs, his chief of staff, and his tasseographer.

Lunch is scheduled...

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down there, speedy.

His tasseo-what now?

Tasseographer.

Someone who reads tea leaves.

Like a psychic?

His name is Ranuga, and he prefers "metaphysical advisor."

I'm sure he does.

Let's just remember

to be respectful,

no matter what we personally believe.

Which is that it's all just a bunch

of pseudo-mystical nonsense

designed to fool the gullible?

Tasseography has been practiced

for over 5,000 years, all right?

You can't just discount it out of hand.

So you're saying Ranuga's the genuine article?

Oh, no, no. Him I'm discounting out of hand.

Yeah, I don't trust anyone who sells out their talents

to the highest bidder.

And Ranuga only has one client:

President Nandasiri.

Got to wonder how much he adjusts the message

to keep the money flowing.

Well, as long as he adjusts his message on our trade deal

to make President Nandasiri happy,

- it's good for us as well. - Mm-hmm.

Seriously,

you're not being fair.

I know, but then my plans changed.

If you want to go, you should go.

Don't make me feel bad about it.

Lucinda...

Everything okay?

- You heard that, huh? - Yeah.

I'm having roommate issues.

Lucinda? Thought you guys were tight.

We were. We are.

Sometimes we're so tight, I can't breathe.

At first it was great. You know,

we got along, we had a ton of stuff in common...

- What happened? - Well,

I joined a few clubs and started making other friends.

But Lucinda,

it's like she just wants to hang out with me all the time.

Well, have you talked to her about it?

She says she knows it's a problem,

but she doesn't do anything about it.

I just... need a break.

You think I'm being harsh, don't you?

No.

My first year in college,

my roommate was so homesick,

he cried himself to sleep every night.

I mean, I-I liked the kid, but...

I felt uncomfortable,

so I asked to be transferred.

And then, of course, I ran into him on the quad

a couple months later, and he'd joined the debate club

or something, he had friends.

It just took him a little longer to adjust.

I sort of felt bad that I didn't hang in there.

So you do think I'm being harsh.

I think it's okay for you

to want to spend time away from your friend.

Just remember to be kind, too, okay?

Mr. President, welcome to the White House.

It's a pleasure to meet you.

The pleasure is mine, Madam President.

Wonderful to see you again, Madam Secretary.

Mr. President.

Uh, ayubowan.

We had thought that Mrs. Nandasiri would be joining us.

She has flown to New York to do some shopping.

There'll be nothing with a designer label left

in the city by the time she is done.

Ceylon tea leaves from our country.

That's very thoughtful of you.

Why don't we get out of the cold and have a cup.

That's a great idea.

Mmm.

You have many treasures in your country, Mr. President,

but I confess, your tea might be my favorite.

We'd happily give you a lifetime supply

in exchange for use of that quote.

May I have some more leaves first, please?

- Of course. - Ah.

Ranuga is going to grace us with a reading.

He will tell you things about yourself you never knew.

I look forward to whatever

you have to say.

In truth,

I say nothing.

I am merely the earthly chalice

the spirits have chosen

to fill with their wisdom.

They speak through me,

that I may bring good tidings to all who are in this room.

Well, speaking of good tidings,

we have some of our own

regarding the trade agreement.

Uh, my team has been negotiating with Scott Goodman of KronicDM,

and I've just learned that he is on board

and eager to get to work.

I very much enjoyed his Super Bowl ad.

The other U.S. companies we've contracted

specialize in wholesale connectivity. Wireless.

But Scott will provide that last mile of connection as well.

Upgraded landlines for your homes and businesses.

He's agreed to contract out some of the work

to the top three Sri Lankan telecoms.

And there's some other small changes, addendums

which we'll address...

Mr. President.

What is it, my friend?

Are you sure?

I'm afraid, um, we have a problem.

What kind of problem?

The spirits have withdrawn their blessings.

We cannot move forward with this trade agreement.

Thanks for scheduling our call so quickly.