Greed

Now time for the man you've all been waiting for.

He is the king of the high street.

He's the Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart of retail.

He's the Da Vinci of dealmaking.

And he's the Monet of money.

Sir Richard McCreadie!

Thank you very much, Caroline.

In that wonderful Monda dress, you look knockout.

When I was at school, my schoolteacher used to read us

a fairy tale at the end of the day.

And my favorite fairy tale was

"The Goose That Laid the Golden Egg."

That's what Monda is to me.

Monda is the golden goose,

and I love the eggs that it lays.

Tonight, we're gonna reward the shining stars. First up,

Distribution Team Leader of the Year,

and that is Amanda Conrad.

Here's 10,000 pounds for you to distribute.

Lifetime Achievement Award

goes to Philip Walker.

I think I should've got this one, to be honest.

I'm sure you put a few hours in yourself. Congratulations.

Next is Buyer of the Year,

for driving the hardest bargains in the business.

Glad I don't have to deal with him.

Good friend of mine, Michael Harris.

Well done. Well done. Here you go.

This year, I'm delighted to announce

that Monda have paid out the biggest dividend

that any private company has ever paid.

One-point-two billion pounds to be paid to our owner

and my very own billion-dollar babe, Samantha.

That is a really big check.

I don't know what to do with all those zeros.

But I feel like we've earned it,

so thank you so much to Rich, and thank you to everybody.

You guys, you know, you've all worked so hard,

and this is for all of you.

I mean... No, not literally, but I mean, thank you.

Thank you.

What a mess.

Why did he need to build an amphitheater?

It was a crazy idea. Too ambitious.

"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:

Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"

- What? - Oh, nothing.

On Friday night for the welcoming drinks,

we are at the Jackie O' Bar. Nice and informal.

That's where Pixie Lott and Fatboy Slim will be playing.

- Oh, Great. Yeah. - Yeah. On Saturday,

we're going to bring the grand piano

to the Oasis Pool for Elton.

Then Sunday daytime we're going to go to the arena

for the gladiator games,

- as you requested. - Yay!

And Sunday night, down by the beach, Coldplay.

What's he saying?

Why are you shrugging? What's he saying?

- Don't know. - You don't know? Why?

He's Bulgarian. I'm Greek.

- You don't understand it? - No.

Fucking hell, Giannis, man!

There is more than one type of foreign language.

I know that. I'm not an idiot. Why are you hiring Bulgarians?

They're cheap. That's why.

It's slow, Giannis. The whole lot.

They never made an amphitheater before.

Yeah, I've never made an amphitheater before, obviously.

This our main beach.

Yeah.

Nice.

Who are they?

They... They are camping.

What is it, Duke of Edinburgh?

- Syrian refugees. - Poor things.

They've come a long way. They won't mind going further.

- Rich. - What?

They're refugees.

They can find refuge somewhere

that isn't smack bang in the middle of our fucking view.

In Greece, all beaches are public.

It's not me. It's my guests.

Some of them are very superficial.

It's just, all I can see is plywood, mate.

I'm really anxious. This is... It's not finished.

Don't worry. Rome wasn't built in a day.

Yeah, but this is... This is a tiny little bit of Rome,

and you've had 10 days.

We could make a virtue of it being half built.

The ruins of an ancient amphitheater.

No. No ruins.

No ruins. Melanie, tell him why.

One photo, and it's an easy tabloid headline.

The end of an empire. Fiddling while Rome burns.

- Handing it to them on a plate. - I know.

They're already like flies on shit.

Sorry. I am joking. It will be finished.

Actually, Rich, from this angle, it looks very...

It's very imperial.

Those who are about to die salute you.

Go on, then. Die.

I'm dying.

Nah, you can die better than that. Die again, but better.

I'm dying.

What's wrong with him? Looks like a rescue cat

that needs to be put down.

I warned you, they don't like being moved.

It takes time for them to settle.

We've not brought him to go on a yoga retreat.

- He's supposed to be scary. - When did you get here?

Last week. All this banging and clattering

isn't helping, all right?

What is this?

- It's... - It's like some sort of prison.

We need something to pep him up a bit. Some cocaine.

The kitchen staff have some. I was told.

What he needs is a sedative, if anything.

- Mum! - Nanny's here now.

- She's still alive. - Come here. Come here.

- Ricky. - All right, Finn.

- Hi, Dad. Yeah, go on. - Where's your big brother?

Adrian's busy working.

- He works too hard. - He'll be here on the night.

- He's a grafter, like his dad. - Yeah.

- Why have you got the lion? - It's for the gladiator games.

We're recreating Gladiator, like we used to.

It was tigers, not lions, in Gladiator.

That film was littered with inaccuracies.

Don't get me started on Gladiator.

We want it to be authentic.

- What's his name? - Clarence.

Hiya.

Schoolboy error.

Never ever show fear to a lion.

Lions can smell fear.

I'm like that. I can smell fear.

What you doing lurking around like a tabloid hack?

I'm Nick, the writer.

- Your biographer. - Yeah, I know who you are.

I was asking what the fuck you're doing.

Rich, don't frighten Nick. He's on your side.

Thank you, Sir Richard, for appearing before us today.

I wasn't aware I had a choice.

Retail fashion is a huge global industry.

In the UK alone, it's worth

an estimated 60 billion pounds annually.

The owner of H&M is the richest man in Sweden.

The owner of Zara is one of the richest men in the world.

You are Britain's equivalent.

Famous for owning several high-street brands,

including Monda and of course M&J.

Last year, M&J went bankrupt with the loss of 11,000 jobs.

- A lot of those were part-time. - You've been described

as the unacceptable face of capitalism. Is that fair?

Have you taken a look in the mirror?

You've been described as "Sir Greedy,"

"Sir Shifty,"

"Greedy McCreadie."

Been calls for you to be stripped of your knighthood.

Sir Richard, what would you say to that?

Envy and jealousy, my doctor tells me,

are incurable diseases. I've done nothing wrong.

Yes, you have.

- Get off him, you bitch! - Disgusting man.

Do you know what you've...? Get off!

I hate those shites that try to embarrass my son in public.

- Scum of the earth. - Where is my job?

- Opportunistic bitch. - Where are our jobs?

How old are you, Nick?

- I'm 44. - You look...

- You look half that. - Thank you very much.

You have very pale skin. Like a baby.

So...

- So you are writing Ricky's book? - That's right.

If you're gonna write something, make sure it's good.

- Well, I'll try. - No, you can't try.

You gotta be able to do it.

You either do it or you can't do it.

Can you write the book, Nick?

Yes. Yes, I can.

- Is that a "yes" I heard? - Yes.

Yes, that's fine.

My son Ricky, he pretends that he's...

He's... You know, he's cocky and loud

and all of that stuff, but he isn't really.

He's very sensitive, very, very shy.

Very shy little boy, he was, when he was at school, you know.

Much more sensitive than people think.

You know, he hides it with all his bluster.

Roll up for the amazing Señor Ricardo, aka Tricky Dicky.

Have you got a coin, Lewis, that I could borrow for this trick?

Thank you very much. We have 50 English pence.

Big spender. Now, watch carefully.

Well, as carefully as you can with your rubbish eyes,

as I make your coin...

disappear.

- Yeah! - Watch again

as I weave another spell,

make it come back. You ready?