Warehouse 13

Previously on Warehouse 13...

Knock, knock.

You're going with Myka as a backup.

My first official assignment as an Agent?

As...An Apprentice.

I'm ready to begin my Apprentice education.

You want juice, or are you a milk person?

You know what I'd really like?

Oh I do indeed. But falling off the wagon, may not be the best option

at this point.

No, no, what?

We're just asking because we're worried about you.

I'm not drinking.

How do we not end up with our brains scrambled

or whatever new way to die there could be?

Well, I mean, look at the bright side.

I'm usually within ten feet of you,

so whatever terrible thing happens to you,

will probably happen to me too.

Comforting.

What is this guy, a jewel thief or a marathoner?

If the artifact let the thief

walk into a jewelry store and vanish,

then why isn't he vanishing now?

Maybe he can't activate it on the run,

or maybe it doesn't do what Artie thinks it does.

That's Kelly.

I told her I'd call to discuss the weekend.

I totally forgot.

Whoa.

Hello.

Ah, careful, just don't damage

the one thing that Kelly's looking forward to.

Nah, little Pete's made of steel.

You go right, I'll go left.

Leena, this one is ready to be shelved.

A tin of sardines?

Yes, it was part of the Shackleton Expedition.

They were trapped in the ice, you know, for two years.

They still had the good sense not to open that.

Had the sardines gone bad?

Very bad.

Artie, I-I just found an anomaly.

Uh, survey says that insurance V.P.s in Hartford

are donating big bucks to charity,

and it doesn't compute.

It's not an anomaly. It's a tax write-off.

Yeah, but these guys gave away 50% of their bank accounts.

I mean, the most they donated before is 1%.

That's a difference of 49--

I can subtract 1 from 50.

That's why you're the boss. Hartford.

Artie, Artie, that could be a Robin Hood artifact.

Yes, it could.

And the prize for finding a case

is a spin around the Warehouse

in Steve McQueen's motorbike?

No, but try a free trip to Hartford,

because Pete and Myka are on the trail

of a vanishing jewel thief in Denver.

So you and I will do this investigation.

You and I? Really?

Yeah.

Well, I mean, I haven't had a lot of time in the field,

and you're-- I'm what?

Uh, nothing.

That was the end of my sentence.

Pack, 'cause we're leaving right away.

Where are my sunglasses?

This is why I pimped your specs.

Just tap the ends of the glasses together

to complete the circuit.

Oh.

Ha.

Brava.

That is, uh, very well done. Well, we're a team.

Claudia and Artie.

"Clartie." "Artia"?

Pack. Yeah.

Pete!

I got the bag! You get him!

Secret Service!

What happened?

Asian guy...

Went out that window.

What is with this guy and windows?

Hey. Are you all right?

Hey, Pete, this way!

Got it covered.

Whoa.

Oh, ow. Oh, ow.

Ow, ow, ow, ow.

Ow, further than I thought.

We lost him.

Ow, but I bet we got the artifact.

Well, let's take a look at it, then.

Jeez, where's the drummer and the fife?

I just hurt my knee, okay? And my shoulder.

And I'm probably gonna have a huge bruise on my--

what is that?

That is the world's smallest purple violin.

Oh.

You know, one day you're gonna make some lucky guy

a very sarcastic wife.

Ah.

Half lion, half eagle.

A Griffin. I know.

Well, did you know that in Chinese Mythology

they were used to guard treasure?

But somehow this one helps people steal treasure

and then make a clean getaway.

Oh, hey, speaking of,

now that the mission is accomplished,

you can go to your High-School Reunion

and see some of your old friends.

You did--you did have friends in High School, right?

Oh, as a matter of fact, Kurt Smoller,

who is the Captain of the football team,

emailed me and invited me personally.

Wow, you and a football Captain, huh?

Yeah, yeah, we hung out.

Okay, I tutored him in math.

Well, that's perfect.

Now you can go back and show big, fat Kurt Smoller

that smart girls grow up pretty.

Fine, I will go.

Excellent.

Now let's bag old, uh, Kathy Griffin there,

shall we?

Ready? Yep.

Nothing to it.

And now for two days,

we get to pretend we're normal.

Leena.

Leena?

Pete!

I have a good name.

Hey, Leena. Hey, Pete.

Wow, I didn't know the Warehouse

had a canned-food aisle.

Ooh, red herrings, huh?

Bet that case was really hard to solve.

Did you hurt your leg?

I did.

I, uh, twisted it nabbing the Griffin,

which I put on Artie's desk.

I didn't see him or Claudia.

They're in Hartford on a mission.

Pete, put that back.

That's the original can of worms.

All right, well, 3:00 on a Friday,

so I'm calling it.

I will see you on Monday.

Take care of that leg.

And you should stay in bed all weekend.

My plan exactly.

Ow, ow, ow.

I think that the donation is suspicious, that's all.

I've done nothing wrong.

I gave money to fund free clinics across the country.

That's a good thing.

Yeah, it's a good thing,

if you did it of your own free will,

but I get a feeling that your wife

wasn't too thrilled with that decision.

Well, what makes you think that?

Okay, she was upset with my sudden generosity,

but that's because she didn't understand why I did it.

Why did you do it?

I don't have to answer to you or my wife.

Is there another woman?

No.

There's only one woman for me.

Okay.

Claudia, I think that we could be dealing

with a home-wrecking artifact.

Two of the V.P.s have filed for divorce.

Oh, make that three.

The V.P. of Product Operations

just called off his engagement.

You got that off the Internet?

Social networking, but old school.

Teri the receptionist is chatty.

Hansen's. So if, uh, Lewis calls--

listen, aside from these donations,

what else do these Truehart executives

have in common?

Well, one thing.

I cross-checked their recent credit card charges.

Hansen's Bar showed up on all three expense accounts.

Can you pull up the receipts?

Observe.

Okay.

Well, each of these guys met with the same person.

You know that how?

Because look, on each receipt,

apple moto.

Are any of these Truehart executives not affected?

John Donley.

Oh, wait. Oh, pickles!