Bob Hearts Abishola

Good morning.

Remember who your friends are.

- Good morning. - Morning.

I see this is your first time dining with us.

- It is. - Well, you are in for a treat.

Really?

Eh.

- Are you diabetic? - No.

Sprinkle this on everything.

- Okay. - And, if you need anything else,

this is my extension.

Ask for Kemi.

- Thank you, Kemi. - You are welcome...

Lorraine Wheeler.

Hmm. That's funny, I know a Bob Wheeler.

So do I.

- Really? - Yeah.

Big marshmallow man with a little mustache?

He's back to the mustache?

Hmm, how do you know him?

He's my ex-husband.

Oh. Isn't that something.

How do you know him?

Oh, we share a dentist.

We both have soft gums.

Bye-bye.

Excuse me, excuse me!

Whoops, sorry! Excuse me!

Move! Move!

Excuse me!

Ooh, ooh! Sorry!

Come on, come on, come on.

Move!

Move, move, move!

Abishola?

Seventh floor...

- sock wife... - What?

Sock wife!

_

Aren't you even curious?

Not at all.

But it's his ex-wife!

A woman who only existed in your imagination

until she developed noncancerous fibroid tumors!

I do not care.

I am not a nosy person.

- Well, I am! - Me, too.

I already know everything I need to know about her.

She cheated on him with his best friend.

Whoa, my kind of gal.

What's she look like?

The answer is right above you.

Well, actually, more...

over there.

This is a terrible idea.

Nobody cares what you think.

What would I even say?

You're a nurse. Check her pulse, take her temperature!

Ask why she's a cheating whore.

I cannot do that.

Well, you're going to have to.

Hello.

Hi, uh, can...

can you help me raise the bed?

Of course.

- Better? - Yes, thank you.

Is there anything else I can do for you?

Yeah.

- Say hi to Bob for me. - What?

Her cover's blown.

How do you know that...?

Relax, I heard he was dating a nurse at this hospital.

I was actually hoping to meet you.

Oh, okay.

It is nice to meet you, too.

- Lorraine. - Abishola.

Well, got to tell you, Abishola,

I'm a little disappointed.

- Why? - I wanted you to be a big chunk of ugly.

Sorry.

You're very beautiful.

Sorry.

When you see Bob,

tell him I'm happy for him.

I will.

He doesn't talk to me anymore.

Well, that might be because you hurt him very badly.

Yeah.

When you cheated on him.

- Mm-hmm. - With his childhood friend.

Hang on, there are two sides to that story.

Oh, what is your side?

Well... I don't come off

real good in that one, either.

What are you two doing up here?

- Hello, Doctor. - Doctor.

Answer my question.

I'm delivering food.

I don't know what she's doing.

Really?!

_

Hey, Kofo.

Hello, Mr. Wheeler's sister.

You can call me Christina.

I cannot.

Would you rather I call you by your last name?

Oh, no. You would not be able to pronounce it,

and it will just embarrass us both.

Dude, I've done a lot of flash mobs.

I don't embarrass easily.

Are you busy?

I could use your help.

I have some minutes.

What do you need?

Describe this to me.

That is our classic men's size nine to 11,

calf-length, sports-fit in red.

Right, but what else could it be?

At a glance,

you could mistake it for a women's large.

Or, if you just saw the one sock,

you might think it's a child's hat.

Sure.

But is there a more enticing way

to describe them to a customer?

Well...

instead of red, you could use

a fancier word like "vermilion."

Oh! I like that.

Where-where did that come from?

It was my favorite crayon color as a young boy.

What about this one?

That is our premium women's anklet in blue.

What would Crayola call it?

Sapphire?

That's great.

There's also sky, indigo, denim,

and, of course, Bluetiful.

Wow, you're like a crayon savant.

Guilty.

Hello, Kofo.

- Hello. - What are you doing?

I am helping Mr. Wheeler's sister update

- the product names. - Mm-hmm.

We're making them sexier.

Is that what you are doing, Kofo?

What can I say?

Blame it on the crayons.

Goodwin, what was your favorite crayon when you were a kid?

Oh, I was too poor for crayons.

We drew pictures by mixing our tears with dirt.

That is so sad.

Ha!

_

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Is everything okay?

Oh, everything is wonderful.

_

_

Have a pleasant afternoon.

What a great guy.

_

So...

you paid no taxes last year?

Not a dime.

Between deductions and losses,

MaxDot Therapeutic Hosiery actually got money back.

So I paid more taxes than your company?

That is not fair.

No. But, it's what makes this country great.

Tunde, leave them alone.

Now I know why you drive a Cadillac.

I deduct that, too.

Oh, come on!

Sorry. That must be really boring for you.

No, I'm happy you are in a good mood.

I guess I am.

So what's been going on with you?

How was your day?

- Anything interesting happen? - I met your ex-wife.

Are you still in a good mood?

Unbelievable!

Is she stalking you? 'Cause she's done that.

No, no, no.

I met her at the hospital.

She's a patient.

Why, what's wrong with her?

I'm not allowed to say.

She gonna be all right?

I believe so.

That's too bad.

Long, painful recovery?

- Probably not. - Damn it.

Bob, stop that.

- You once loved this woman. - Hey!

If I can't joke about my ex-wife

dying a horrible death, I don't know what

you and I have left to say to each other.