Santa Stole Our Dog: A Merry Doggone Christmas!

Ho ho!

Ho ho ho!

Huh!

What's that, Dad?

Check it out.

It's a frozen cookie. So what?

This is not any ordinary oatmeal cookie, Tommy.

Santa Claus bit into this cookie.

Santa Claus?

Yeah. Good old Saint Nick.

There's no such thing as Santa Claus.

Of course there's a Santa Claus.

When did you stop believing in Santa?

Since I grew up.

You're only 13.

I'm going to be 14 in four and a half months.

Besides, I'm going to be a detective someday,

and I live by facts and facts alone.

What does that have to do with not believing in Santa Claus?

We get presents every year as proof.

That's not proof.

Well, you got that cookie.

And this cookie is almost 30 years old.

I wouldn't eat it if I were you.

That's right.

Now all we have to do is figure out who took a bite out of that cookie.

How do you do that?

I'm a detective, Suzie. I'll just send it to the lab.

What lab, silly?

Dad, don't they do DNA tests nowadays?

I think they do.

People find out their exact family heritage.

Can't Mom do it? Doesn't she do that with her patients?

Probably.

So we'll send it to her, and she'll prove that Santa Claus doesn't exist.

That is an excellent idea.

That's an excellent idea.

It certainly is.

Here we are, kids.

Hey, little guy.

He's cute.

Suzie, come over here.

Who's that?

You're really cute.

What's your name?

-Hey, he winked. -Suzie?

Hey, Suzie.

Who's this?

Scoot over.

Hey, guys. Who's this?

He's really cute.

Now, we're just looking, okay?

It's almost Christmas. Come on.

He may not be here when we come back.

Yeah, Dad.

Don't worry, Rusty.

Rusty, huh?

His fur. He looks a little rusty.

I like that.

No, guys, no.

We were just looking.

Please, Dad?

We'll take care of him and everything.

Right, Suzie?

Right.

No!

Come on, guys.

Hey, little guy.

You want to come home with us?

And this is the adoption form.

And this makes Rusty an official member of your family.

Now, as I mentioned, Rusty, um,

-does have a mild thyroid condition. -Okay.

It's not uncommon for dogs over the age of six.

And these are his tags, and he's had his vaccinations,

and he is now a member of your family.

Great. Well, consider this an early Christmas gift.

Thanks, Dad.

Happy Holidays.

Let's go, Rusty! You got a new home.

Absolutely no way.

You know I'm not a dog person.

I'm not allowing that fur ball in this house.

Come on, Mom. Look how cute he is.

Come on, Janice.

What gave you the insane idea to get them a dog for Christmas?

Come on, Mom. Please?

I said no.

Dinner's almost ready.

Oh whoa, whoa. What's this?

It's Dad's 30-year-old cookie.

We need you to run DNA tests on it to prove that there's no Santa.

We need a DN...

You need to DNA it to prove to Tommy that Santa Claus is real.

Mm-hmm.

This your father's idea?

This is why we don't live together anymore.

Come on, honey. Let's get washed up for dinner.

Oink, oink! Oink, oink!

Oink, oink, oink!

Hurry up, Dad. Mom's gonna be here any minute.

Dad, come on. Let's go!

Let go, Suzie. They're mine.

They're mine!

Let go. You're gonna break it.

It's mine!

It's mine. Let go!

No!

Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas!

Have you been good boys and girls?

I'm gonna get you! Ho ho ho!

Rah!

Hey.

Come on, kids.

I have to stop by the hospital, and then we'll head home.

Bye, Daddy.

-Bye, Dad. -Bye.

-Hey, where's my hug? - Let's go, let's go.

I sit in the front seat.

You'll both sit in the back seat.

Come on. Quit dawdling.

Quick. I gotta get to the hospital.

Suzie, have you got everything?

Mmm.

Mom.

What, honey?

Why are you and Daddy not living together?

Oh, because we're not getting along right now.

Don't you like Daddy anymore?

I love your father,

but we are very different people.

How are you different?

Your father needs to grow up.

You mean he's gonna get bigger? No, sweetie.

He often plays the big kid,

and he needs to grow up and deal with the world around him.

My teacher said a person can be childlike without being childish.

What does that mean?

It means that an adult can still have

the wonder and appreciation of a child

without acting like a child.

Isn't that what Daddy is?

Hey, can Rusty come visit us?

The dog stays at your father's house.

Mmm.

Honey, I didn't grow up with any animals.

They are a big responsibility.

They shed, and they're dirty, and they poop everywhere.

Poop?

I never understood why anyone would want that responsibility.

But isn't it worth the responsibility?

They can be our best friend. They can make us happy when we're sad.

Can't we trust them more than people?

Yes.