Four Weddings and a Funeral

Previously on Four Weddings and a Funeral...

I... I want to give it a try.

Just to be clear, you're talking boyfriend and girlfriend, right?

Yes.

Craig, what is he doing here?

This was a mistake. I should go.

Kash is my friend.

You have known Kash for a couple of years.

I have been one of your best friends since college.

This is a total betrayal.

Will you marry me?

No. I can't marry you, Craig.

I just don't wanna mess this up.

There's nothing to mess up.

You do know you can do better than Maya, don't you?

Hi, Craig.

I still think about when we first met.

Maya!

Hey, over here.

Oh, Gemma's there.

She wanted to tell me something.

It's fine. Hi.

What?

I mean, you've got lipstick on your teeth,

but I didn't want to tell you that.

So do you know why we're here?

What's Craig's big announcement?

Christ, I hope it's not that he's getting his blues band back together.

It was awful.

- Awful. - Ladies and gentlemen,

can I have your attention, please?

Surprise! Zara's back!

And we're getting married!

I'm blinded. Blinded!

That is the biggest rock I've ever seen.

Is it real? Yeah.

Have you bitten it?

So how did this happen?

Well, when Craig surprised me on Love Chalet,

I wasn't ready to forgive him.

I was still really hurting, you know?

So I convinced myself that Garrett was the one.

Convinced me too.

Good actress, this one. Yeah.

But it wasn't until Garrett proposed

that I realized my heart belonged to another.

Aww.

Who?

Craig.

We're getting married in a real palace.

Queen Elizabeth I grew up there,

and they used it in a toilet paper commercial.

- Oh, wow. -

And the best part of it is...

Love Chalet is paying for it!

No!

The best part is,

our wedding is gonna be on TV!

- No! - Oh, my God.

We're gonna be famous! I know!

I'm gonna call my mum.

Oh, my God.

Such a beautiful night...

You know, minus the dampness and the cold.

Yeah, I might go inside, actually.

I'm freezing.

Want my coat?

Cool, yeah. Yeah.

Thanks, Duffy.

Ooh, but I'm keeping all these loose Skittles in your pocket.

No take-backs. Okay, yeah.

Sorry about that.

Hey!

How's my best man doing?

What? I'm your best man?

They wanted to stunt cast it with Damon Wayans Jr.,

but I said no.

It's gotta be my man, Duffy.

Oh, my God, Craig. Thank you.

- Eh, love you, brother. - Of course, yeah.

You know, I, uh, invited Ainsley tonight.

You think she'll show?

I don't think so. She's still pretty upset.

Oh, Maya,

I'm sorry you can't be a bridesmaid.

You're too pretty. Pippa situation.

It... it's okay.

But I've got a feeling

you're gonna be the star of your own big day soon enough.

Hey.

Oh, look who it is. Muhammad Ali.

- - How's the hand?

Uh, pretty good.

I punched, like, six more guys on the way here.

- - Can I get you a drink?

Uh, yeah, sure. I'll have a...

Nope, let me guess.

American girls are always like...

Vodka soda, splash of cranberry.

Uh, no, no. I would never order that.

I only drink, um...

Kahlúa and tomato juice.

- Really? - Yep.

So if I order that, you'll drink it?

Yeah, go for it. Make it a pitcher.

Listen. At the hospital...

Don't.

I don't wanna... No, you're right.

Sorry.

It's just, I don't know the next time I'll get to see you,

and obviously, there's something between us...

Kash, stop it.

You just don't wanna admit it because you're scared.

I'm scared?

Coming from the runaway groom who secretly wants to be an actor.

Tell me you don't think about me too,

and then I'll move on and never talk about this again.

Of course I think about you.

I don't.

You should move on.

You're all I can think about.

I wish that I didn't.

I keep telling myself to forget you.

But for some reason, I can't.

I wish things weren't so complicated.

We haven't even had the chance to explore what this could be.

But I can't keep lying awake every night

thinking about this person I can never be with.

I have to let you go.

I write this letter knowing I will never send it

but needing to admit the truth,

even if it's just to myself.

You will always be the one that got away.

Love, Maya.

Hey! Ugh.

- You again? - God.

Just 'cause we don't have the death penalty

doesn't mean you can do whatever you please.

Yeah, sorry.

Three more times, I'm giving you a warning.

What? They're back together?

Yeah, and Love Chalet wants to host their wedding.

Zara said she wants, like, 15 bridesmaids in clear dresses...

I don't know... but she wants to arrive in a pumpkin carriage...

You know, I don't need all the tacky details of a wedding I'm not even gonna go to.

- Hi. - Hey.

I didn't know you were coming over.

Yeah, um,

can we talk?

So,

things have been kinda weird between us lately, right?

Like, I'm not imagining this?

I don't know. Weird like what?

Well, the other night at the club,

you just kinda left me, and then yesterday,

when Zara made that joke about us being married,

you stopped breathing for two whole minutes.

It just took me by surprise.

I mean, we've been dating for a few weeks.

Look, um,

you know, we're great as friends.

And if we're not on the same page, um,

we could always just be friends.

Wait, you wanna break up?

No. No, no, no. I'm not saying that.

I...

But

if you're not that into this,

then yeah.

Okay, uh,

if that's how you feel, let's just be friends.

Yeah, okay, cool.

Cool.

Please.

They're low-glycemic pakoras for Dad's diabetes.

I'd rather lose a leg than eat this crap.

Kashif, you must know why Imam Iqbal is here.

You and Fatima have been seeing each other for a month.

I should have met her parents by now.

Doesn't that seem a little fast?

Even Marks & Spencer has a 90-day return policy.

Fatima is not a polo shirt, bacha.

It's time the families sat down and talked about next steps.

I can't get a reputation for facilitating sinful relations.

Sinful relations? We haven't even held hands.

Kash, you like Fatima, don't you?

Yeah.

She's smart. She's beautiful.

She hates the same celebrities I do.

It's the whole package, really. Well, then...

I don't want to pressure you, beta,

especially after your last public humiliation.

But I would really like to hold my grandchildren before I die,

but no pressure.

Dude, Fatima's out of your league.

What's the problem?

Okay,

let's do it.

Let's meet the parents.

Babe, the venue can only hold 200 people.