Asteroid

So this is it?

Yeah, this is it.

Meh.

- Sweetie, you know how important this is to your father.

Can you just try to give it a chance?

The roof needs work.

Well, you're here for the summer

so you can help me fix it or you can deal with it.

There's no service here.

I'm going to plant a garden.

- Why would you buy a house where there's no cell service?

- There is cell service in a room upstairs.

You just have to lean out the window a little bit.

I guess that's my room then.

Great.

It's the bathroom.

Am I being punished for something?

Haven't been here 10 minutes

and you're already complaining.

Just give it a rest, please.

Fine.

Keys?

Hello?

Spence.

Spencer.

She's going to need internet.

- Thought we agreed we wouldn't let her grow up

in front of a screen.

We did, and then she did it anyway

because that's what teenagers do.

Come on.

We just need a little bit of internet.

Love you.

Are you the Colemans?

That's us, yeah.

I'll show you where things go.

Are advising it is unethical and it is downright-

- NASA is abuzz today over a recent discovery that-

That was Love, Lies, and Fiction

with "Simple Life."

And I'm Leslie Ann with your morning mix, good morning.

What a beautiful day in downtown Oneonta.

Plenty of sunshine on tap.

She's still on the radio.

This place never changes.

Hello, sir.

Internet Store?

- Oh, we had a bunch of complaints about our service.

So instead of fixing anything, we just rebranded.

Well, I'm here for some internet.

Oh, you've come to the right place.

Transfer or new account?

A new account.

It's not for me though.

It's actually for my daughter,

but I'm paying, so I guess it's for me.

Well, you can't ignore technology.

Adapt or die.

What's the new address?

113 Herrick Hill Road.

Oh no.

Oh no, this isn't good at all.

Sir, you can't get internet.

Like not even a little bit?

- Nope, you're right outside our service area.

You know, we could run a line to your house,

which would cost...

$33,412.

Son of a bitch.

Will you be paying cash or card?

No, I'm not gonna...

There's gotta be some kind of other option.

We do offer a payment plan.

No, I mean like a satellite or whatever.

- It seems like the dishes can't get a signal there either.

Weird.

Figures.

What are you going to do?

C'mon, Lynn.

Hey.

Hey, there you are.

Sorry, I had to run upstairs.

The service is great up here.

How'd it go?

Oh, bad news.

Can't get internet.

Not even a little bit?

Nope.

We're outside the service area

and satellites won't work either.

So, how do we tell Zoe?

Damn it!

He couldn't buy a house with working light bulbs?

- She would like for you to buy some light bulbs.

Hey, excuse me.

Can you tell me...

Kenny.

Spence!

Oh, so you did move back.

How do you know that?

Oh, you know, small town.

Right.

So how's your pops doing?

Oh, passed away a few years back.

Yeah.

Left me the store, so I'm running things now.

I'm sorry to hear that.

Yeah, it's all right.

Tell me about these smart bulbs.

- Oh man, listen, those are super cool, man.

Everybody's buying these things now.

Check this out.

You can turn them on and off with an app.

Yeah.

You can even change the color.

Do you want to get some of those or?

- No, no, I'll just stick with the dumb bulbs.

Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, cool.

Hey, so where's the new house?

Outskirts of town.

Yeah, a couple of miles out.

- Oh, cool, cool. - Yeah.

Well, thanks.

Oh, no problem, man.

You know, I don't need a bag.

Oh, I got you.

All right.

Here you go.

So how about yourself?

Do you have family in town or?

Nah, nah.

Just a store.

Yeah.

Big news day, huh?

Oh, you didn't hear?

Man, NASA is making some huge announcement.

Yeah, they've been talking about it all day.

That's a bunch of bullshit.

You guys know the earth is flat, right?

I'm not going to say aliens but-

- The less I know about the outside world, the better.

I hear you, man.

Hey, listen.

We should get together or something.

You know, grab a beer.

Yeah, sometime.

I got to get back to...

Let me get my number for you here.

You know, I just have so much to do.

Oh, no, no, one second.

Let me, let me find a pen.

You don't have to do that.

No, it's no problem.

- I should probably get going, a lot of work to do.

Oh, here we go.

Ah, hold on a second.

Let me see here.

There we go.

That's my cell.

Great.

All right, thanks.

Hey, man, good seeing you.

- Have a good day. - You too.

And it looks like NASA is about ready

to go live.

We're gonna switch over to them right now.

- Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for your time.

A little over eight hours ago,

a near earth object or NEO was spotted

by one of our telescopes.

It was not detected earlier

due to its trajectory originating from behind the sun.

According to our admittedly early calculations,

we predict that an asteroid will strike somewhere

within the continental United States

within the next 72 hours.

We will have more information about its exact impact point

in the near future, but we are now going to open up-

Come on, now?

I'm sure everything's going to be fine.

We're in the middle of nowhere in upstate New York.

Everything is not going to be fine, Mom.

Even if it hits in the middle of Idaho,