Angie Tribeca

The poor suckers have no idea what they're being exposed to.

It'd be hilarious if it wasn't so funny.

Morning, Raul.

What? I'm not doing anything. Hagar wanted me to get a file.

Sounds great. Have a good one.

Hey, Raul. You get a haircut?

'Cause you look terrific.

Give me the number.

My husband's always looking for a place.

Yeah, absolutely.

Rauuuul...

You forgot to sign...

Keith's birthday card.

Okay.

Oh.

Morning.

You want me to grab that for ya?

Uh, it's fine. The mailbox is right there.

I'll just shove it in. Right.

Wouldn't it be quicker for you just to give it to me?

It's kind of sensitive information. That's all.

Maybe it's something you shouldn't be mailing, then.

Morning.

I'm afraid my parasitic illness has progressed more rapidly

than doctors anticipated.

Scholls, would you...

Raul Chamgerlain worked at the offices

of Hagar & Marmaduke

as a law clerk until he was mailed to death

at 10:25 a.m. yesterday, just missing the morning pickup.

Let me guess... Hagar & Marmaduke represents Veggelon,

the largest industrial-farming company in America.

Veggelon raised eyebrows at the EPA

when they released a new pesticide,

and a study was commissioned.

Once their lawyers got involved,

all of a sudden, the study vanished.

Good guess. That's exactly right.

Let me also guess...

Chamgerlain had the goods on Veggelon

and was gonna sing like a canary.

That's also exactly right,

and he missed the concert because of his death. Oh.

I'm the most perceptive person anyone's ever met,

and I still can't figure out how this involves us.

Although, you really dislike Tribeca.

Something happened between you.

That's ridiculous.

I love Tribeca.

Don't you people see?

The government is powerless

against these giant corporations.

Sorry. Not powerless.

Paid by.

Veggelon has unleashed this pesticide

on the town of Cheyenne, Wyoming,

and in addition to having to live there,

people are already experiencing health issues.

But all their complaints

are being squashed by Veggelon's lawyers.

So we're gonna take 'em down.

Hagar & Marmaduke, Veggelon,

and maybe a few townspeople

just to let 'em know we're really serious.

Whoa.

So we're actually fighting evil people

for the sake of innocent people.

We're the good guys.

You see, Tribeca, the Special Division Force is a good force.

It's a force for truth and justice.

Scholls, pass out the phony law degrees.

Ooh.

In this case, the patient regrew neurons

in the same area, resulting in...

increased motor function and tactile sensitivity

that continued to...

Mm. Mm. Mm.

This just feels wrong.

That's my phone. Mm.

What about the team?

Don't you think they're starting to suspect?

Oh, trust me, they're clueless.

Mm. Mm. They're so going to plow-town.

That's my son.

Soon to be your grandson, am I right?

What about the age difference?

You're 24. I'm 23.

Yeah, and in 20 years, we'll both be the same age.

I just know this is gonna go south somehow.

I'm counting on it. Mm.

Wait, Murphy, who's driving?

Ms. Blatt, it is your contention that the toxic pesticides

used by Veggelon have caused you grievous and irreparable harm.

Objection. Objection.

You do not have to answer that.

I don't? No, you don't.

Excuse me, honey. Give Mommy one second, okay?

I'm Conney Sparzner,

and I'll be representing Ms. Blatt in this case.

I just got my law license after 15 years of being a homemaker.

My husband was laid off from the deodorant plant,

so I kinda had to pick up the slack.

We don't need to know all that.

Again, Ms. Blatt, you're claiming

that you suffered harm due to my client's use of pesticides.

And yet, you seem perfectly fine.

In what way did these FDA-approved pesticides

cause you any health issues?

I've been getting headaches, nose bleeds,

and I've been diagnosed with high blood pressure.

All of which could be pre-existing conditions.

Ms. Sparzner, let me give you

your first real-world experience as a lawyer...

You have no case, and you're gonna lose.

This is America, where the evil guys always win at first.

Then I guess I'll see you later in the story.

We got this.

This pesticide is some pretty nasty business.

It penetrates the blood-brain barrier

and disrupts the endocrine system.

It looks pretty innocuous.

How is it at killing pests? Unbeatable.

Doesn't even compare to the stuff you can get at the store.

Sir, no.

It'll have no effect on the parasite.

I got to do something.

It's starting to affect my work,

and things are starting to feel very loose inside.

Hey, don't worry about it, Chief.

We've got you covered. Charo and I go undercover

at Hagar & Marmaduke this afternoon.

Scholls? Headed to my new job

at Veggelon's processing facility.

Tribeca?

I'm gonna go sit with Dorothy Blatt

and hear her story, but if I don't get back by 4:00,

I'm gonna have to pump again.

Oh. Oh, what? I'm sorry.

Is my making food for my child offending you?

And after that, we try a motion for dismissal

on the grounds of insufficient standing.

And if that doesn't work, we move to disqualify the evidence.

- Any questions? - Yeah, I have one.

Can you, uh, explain the strategy

behind the defense of Veggelon's pesticide?

That's what we've been doing for the past hour and a half.

I'm sorry, who are you?

Uh, this is Morton...

Peppercorn.

He is one of the new associates.

And who are you?

Sh... That's, uh, Marla... Flender.

The other new associate.

I wasn't aware that we brought on any new associates.

Oh, yeah. I-It was in the memo.

All right, Flender,

here's everything we have on the plaintiff, Dorothy Blatt.

Find anything we can use to discredit her.

Peppercorn, research these precedents.

Find any support for getting the evidence tossed.

You're Flender! You're Peppercorn!

Okay. Now get to work.

After the baby carrots are pulled from their mothers,

they're brought here.

You see this robot?

It sorts the good carrots from the bad.

Make sure it stays on.

Think you can handle it?

Seems easy enough.

Whoa!

You gotta wear these.

Never touch the carrots with your bare hands.

Now glove up and get to it.

We have a shipment for the preschool that leaves at 2:00.

Are you aware of the use

of dangerous pesticides by Veggelon?

Listen, lady, I just train people to keep the robot on

and to add dangerous pesticides to the carrots.

Yep, I see it.

That's a parasite, all right.

Uh, I don't mean to question your credentials, Dr. Zaius,

but as I remember, you got your doctorate in Art?

Is the human body not the world's

most beautiful piece of art?

I guess.

The theory of this treatment is that the only thing

that can kill a parasite is a more powerful parasite.

This is an egg salad sandwich that was made on Monday.

Mm, that doesn't sound so bad.

Monday 2008.

Okay, now that you've finished your snack,

let's begin your treatment.

Nurse, the specimen, please.

This is Cymothoa exigua,

the tongue-eating sea louse.

Once we introduce it into your system,

it will begin consuming everything inside your body,

hopefully beginning with your parasite.

After that, it's just a race to see who dies first... you or it.

I like my chances.