Beverly Hills Cop

Truck looks great. There must be a fuckin' fortune here.

I know... Let's not in front of him, alright?

OK, no problem, no problem.

Tell me somethin', fellas, what's goin' on? Shit.

I been here too long. Talk to me.

Just give us a minute.

I ain't got no more minutes. Check this out. I want you to see somethin'.

You can't get no cleaner than this. These are very popular with children.

You know what this is in here? A federal tax stamp.

You can't get no cleaner than that! Talk to me! Tell me somethin'.

So go into business yourself if it's such a great fuckin' deal.

I would, but I ain't from Detroit.

I don't even know nobody in town that can handle a job this big,

but you all got all the connections, you know.

Tell me somethin', shit, I'm a businessman.

- Do what you wanna do. - It ain't easy to get rid of this shit.

I know, but I'm a businessman, this is my thing.

I'm doin' business here.

Warm up the truck. Let's get the fuck outta here.

- That's what I'm talkin' about. - You're a sharp kid, I like you.

Thank you very much. I appreciate it.

Cousin, my man, don't dash yet. This is like two grand to me.

- This doesn't look like $5,000. - Let me see that.

The deal's for 5,000. That's about 2,000. Count it yourself.

You know what, this pisses me off.

I told my people it was supposed to be five grand here,

and look at this shit, they stiffed us.

No, they stiffed you, 'cause I want my money, man.

Son of a bitch, you can't count on anybody today,

but I tell you what, let's not fuckin' hassle about it now.

Take the two fucking grand and on the next score,

I promise I'll make it up to you.

Look, don't jerk me off, all right?

Jerk somebody else off, this is bullshit.

I need $5,000 dollars, not 2,000 thing, don't do this to me.

Don't be unreasonable. You're not dealin' with Johnny Bananas.

- I got you covered. - I got no idea what Johnny Banana,

but can I have my money... Look, can I say it slow for you.

I need five thousand dollars!

Read my lips: Five thousand dollars, is what I need.

This is bullshit here. I can't do nothin' with that.

If you want to be a fuckin' asshole, you can take the whole load

and smoke 'em yourself in the park.

- I don't smoke Lucky Strike. - I got people I gotta answer to.

- I smoke King Size Kent. - I can't make a price of my...

Fuck this. Nice doin' business with you, kid.

Hey, buddy, what you doin' here?

Officers, do you know what just happened?

You ain't gonna believe this shit. The truck, it just stopped, man!

It just stopped! You got some jumper cables, you give me a jump?

Hey... don't I know you from someplace?

No, that ain't me, I'm from Buffalo.

Both you guys, break out some ID.

Let's get the fuck outta here!

Shit! What the fuck?

Oh, shit.

Freeze, asshole!

Foley, we should've known it was you.

Hey, Axel, way to go!

- I don't understand. - I don't have time, Jeffrey.

Todd's lookin' for you, he's really pissed.

He said this is your worst fuck-up ever.

Personally, I don't think that's true. He's not in there.

Yeah, I can see that, Jeff.

If you'd busted these guys, maybe he wouldn't have been so mad.

Now I heard you got caught up haggling for money?

$2,000 wasn't enough money.

If I took it, those guys woulda known I was a cop.

- Todd's gonna tear you another asshole. - Don't go anywhere.

I'm not sayin' you did anything wrong.

If you had busted these guys it would've worked out better.

That's all I'm sayin'. Where you goin' now?

I'm gonna go get my shit and get outta here.

No, big mistake, big mistake.

- Want my advice? - No.

- You know what I would do? - No, I don't.

Talk to him. He'll be right back.

Get away from me or I'm gonna shoot you. No time for you today.

You know what I would do?

Just lighten up. I'm not listening to you. I'm not listening.

You're makin' it a lot worse for yourself.

- - This is great, thank you guys.

Hey, Axel, you got a cigarette?

- Did you write that one? - That's what I'm tryin' to tell you.

Everybody knows about you and the truck.

Jeffrey, will you listen to me?

I am not listening to you, I'm ignoring you.

- La-la-la-la-la-la-la! - Great! Great, real mature.

I am not listening to Jeffrey, but he's still talking.

- I am not listening to you! - I really hate when you do that.

- Then stop then. - It's childish!

- Is that fuckin' Foley in here? - Oh, shit.

There's Todd, it's show time, OK?

I know what you're gonna say...

Where the fuck you come off goin' undercover without authorization?

What the fuck is this all about?

You wanna play some fuckin' bullshit cowboy cop,

go do it in somebody else's precinct.

Don't you want to hear my side of the story?

What's your fuckin' side of the story?

Let's hear your side of the story.

Axel, I'm not takin' any more of this shit from you.

You know how much this little stunt is gonna cost this city?

I don't think cost is the issue here, sir.

I think the issue should be my blatant disregard for proper procedure.

You damn right, wise-ass!

The mayor called the chief. The chief called the deputy chief.

The deputy chief just chewed my ass out!

You see I don't have any bit of it left, don't you!

Where in the fuck did you get a truckload of cigarettes from anyway?

From the Dearborn hijack.

The Dearborn hijack? That bust went down last week.

That truck is supposed to be in the damn pound!

I tried to tell you.

Jeffrey, this is none of your fuckin' business.

This is not my locker.

Listen, Axel, no more of these setups, you understand?

You're a good cop. You got great potential,

but you don't know every fuckin' thing.

And I'm tired of takin' the heat for your ass.

One more time and you're out on the street.

- Do you understand me? - Let me tell you...

Do you understand me?

Yeah, I understand.

Boss.

The chief ain't chew it all out, you still got a little ass there.

Don't fuck with me, Axel.

Not now. Go on, go home.

Hey!

Hey, man!

- How you doin'?! - All right.

I see you're still breakin' in people's houses.

What'd you expect with that lock? Why didn't you buy a real fuckin' lock?

I don't need no lock, I got my pistol. I pop a cap in somebody.

I can't afford no electrical bill. Close my refrigerator.

You got groceries and shit all inside there.

- Look at you! - Yeah.

- Yo, man, when you'd get out? - I walked out six months ago.

You got out six months ago, and you're just comin' now?

They got me out a year early for, you know, good time,

and I went out to California to get some sun.

- I got to show you somethin'. - I ain't seen you in two years.

Ten thousand Deutsche Marks.

- Deutsche Mark? - Yeah.

What is that?

They're bearer bonds. They're bonds. Untraceable.

You stole 'em?

- No. It's not... - I don't wanna hear it.

I'm sorry I even asked.

- It's just good to see you, man. - I missed you, man.

- Yeah. - I missed you.

What were you doin' in California, anyway?

- I was workin'. - Workin' where?

- Guess. - I don't know, where were you workin'?

- Beverly Hills. -

- What were you doin'? - You ain't gonna believe this man.

- What? - I was a security guard.

Who the fuck's gonna hire you as a security guard?

Jenny Summers.

Jenny Summers?!

Oh, man, I haven't seen Jenny in years! What she up to?

Axel, she's doin' great, right?

She's the manager of this art gallery,

the Hollis Benton Art Gallery out in Beverly Hills.

It's like a world famous place. You ever hear of it?

Yeah, I buy all of my art there.

Eight ball, corner pocket, two cushions.

Fifty bucks you don't make that shot.

- Bullshit. - A hundred.

You got a bet.

What are you gonna do.

You're just as bright as you always were.

Twenty, 40, 60, 80, take it. Have a party.

Pleasure doin' business with you.

What the fuck you gonna do?

Miss, excuse me, two more Scotch and sodas.

I got a great idea.

I got a great idea!

Let's steal a car.

Are you serious?

I'm a fuckin' police officer, I can't steal cars no more.

- What's wrong with you? - So what?

Remember the time you stole that car, man?

A fuckin' Cadillac.

We had to go and drive it on the expressway.

You fucking maniac.

I also remember you had to go to jail behind that shit, too.

That wasn't a jail, it was a state school.

State school is jail when you're 15 years old.

Not jail, man, that's like... That's like day camp compared to jail.

How come you didn't tell on me when you got caught?

- You didn't tell we were together? - You don't know?

- You don't know? - No.

It's because I love you, man.

Ah! One more round.

Hold still, Mike. I gotta open the door, OK?

Balance yourself. OK, here we go.

I'm openin' the door now, OK? Here we go. All right, here we go.

Axel!

Hey, Mikey. Where've you been?