The Baby

She had no idea what was going on.

By the time they get her to me,

she's frothing at the mouth.

- Oh, Christ. - Gosh, that glaze looks wonderful.

- How do you get that lovely color? - Thank you.

I use molasses, more than you think.

I always thicken it up on the hob

before it goes in the oven.

So, now they call him Pavarotti.

Fred's been making me listen to opera.

He says it's good for baby.

Really?

Babies are like sponges...

even in the womb.

My job is to make sure

baby's only absorbing goodness.

That's fascinating.

Quickly! Give me your hand.

There!

Did you feel it?

There it is.

Excuse me.

4-5-7-8, hello?

Hello?

Wrong number.

Sit down, son.

I'm afraid I've got some sad news.

No point in dragging it out.

I'm dying.

Cancer of the bowel.

Your brother's had some of his best people

working on it for a while.

I've a year left... Maybe a little less.

Hello?

I can't believe I only saw you four hours ago.

I miss you like crazy.

Hello, Heather.

Have you packed?

Yes... we're just in the middle of dinner.

I'll wait for you on the corner. At 12.

I'm really looking forward to it.

I love you.

You too.

That was... Heather.

About the... bake sale on Sunday.

I love you, Helen.

I love you, too.

You're repulsed by me.

I am not repulsed by you.

You chose this neighborhood.

You chose this house. You...

And you chose the curtains.

You chose the crockery.

You chose to work.

You chose this life...

with me.

We should have a baby.

Can't you say something, for Christ's sake?

My father's dying.

- Jack... - Please? Please, my love.

Please?

It'll help me sleep.

You're late.

Sorry.

Jack doesn't know this place exists.

I inherited it from a maiden aunt.

"Maiden aunt"?

Miss Lizzie Eaves.

Raging lesbian, of course.

- Woo! - Ah!

And we have...

Hey! Free electricity.

Electricity!

Did we steal it?

Glodean, how am I meant to get them to sleep now?

- Come on. Night, Auntie. - Thank you.

Come on, little man.

Free electricity! Free electricity! Free electricity!

Mm-hm, mm-hm. Yeah, that's it.

Yeah, I made it with a kick, babe.

- You did? - Hm.

- So, what? Is this just for me? - Just for you.

All right, get a room.

This is it.

You see, I thought you forgot about us.

Impossible.

You all know Helen.

Hello.

Hi.

Um, to say thank you... for... letting me stay.

Thanks, that was very nice of you.

This ain't just some hotel she could have a holiday away from her rich husband.

It's not a holiday.

Why do you always go with white girls, Nour?

- Excuse me? - Does it make you feel good?

- Come on, Lin. - To think about her husband?

Or maybe... it's 'cause you want everything that he's got.

A nice little house, a nice little wife.

And a pair of pretty little kids.

- Nice to see you, Helen. - Fuck you, Lin.

All right, enough.

If you need to stay, you stay.

Was that true?

What?

That you want kids.

I mean... yeah.

I want a family... one day.

Why?

I don't know.

Mm...

I thought Lin would be all right.

I didn't think it would be this complicated.

It's family.

Family's complicated.

- Oh. - Hey.

You okay?

Yeah.

"Morning, Heather."

"Morning, Helen. How was your weekend?"

"Lovely, thank you.

My dyke girlfriend fucked me cross-eyed, how was yours?"

- Helen! - Heather!

- Could I have a quick word? - Of course.

We've been made aware of your change in circumstances.

I don't know what you mean.

Jack told you, didn't he?

Uh...

I really need this job.

Honestly... what did you expect?

This is a family library, Helen.

Soon as mine found out I was with Lin,

he decided he wanted full custody.

Sent a social worker around last week to interview the kids.

Worried for their... "psycho sexual development."

Mikey's not mine, he's Lin's ex's.

Where's she?

Prison.

What did she do?

Defended herself.

- You ready? - Mm-hm.

Ooh!

You're goin', hon.

You look good.

Police!

Police!

Police! Police!

We're looking for a missing person!

Yeah, we're all missing people in here!

Think you're funny, do ya?!