The Neighborhood

Oh, Tina, look at you, girl.

Yes, and look at you.

Oh, oh-oh, - look at my husband. - Oh...

Looking like a chocolate snack.

Ooh.

You better know it.

What kind of snack am I?

Ooh, uh, you are looking like a...

smoked gouda on a Triscuit.

Ooh!

- You better know it. - Yeah.

- Mm. - Oh, Dave, that's what you're wearing to the concert?

Boy, white people get to wear anything.

Well, at least his toes aren't out this time.

Looking all long and weird.

- Hey-hey. Oh!

There's our beautiful mother-to-be.

Sorry we're late.

I was gonna wear something else,

but I grew out of it as I was putting it on.

Ooh, yes.

Dave, you're not getting dressed?

Damn it! I am dressed.

Calvin, thank you so much for getting us these tickets.

We are huge Toni Braxton fans.

Ah, you're welcome.

And just so you all know,

this counts as everybody's birthday

and Christmas gift.

Excuse me?

Uh, not you, babe. No... Oh.

Calvin, thank you so much for getting Grover a ticket.

You know, we played Toni Braxton for him in utero.

It is so perfect that this is gonna be his first concert.

He is so excited.

Well, damn, he doesn't look excited.

He looks like he's ready for bed.

Grover, come on. You're gonna love it.

This is the music you grew up on.

I like her music.

I just don't want to go to my first concert

with a-a-a bunch of old people.

Who's he calling old? Who the hell...?

Okay, babe, babe, babe, babe.

Hey... you know what? No, I'll give him a reason to go to bed.

Now, Grover, go home and put on a real pair of pants.

Now.

Oh...

My Triscuit went from gouda to pepper jack.

Now, are you sure you're up to going out like this?

Oh, yeah. I want to make the most

of the last few weeks before Daphne arrives.

Yeah, and tonight is about fun.

No stressing about

the massive, life-changing event that's looming over us.

I may miss a few songs, though.

This baby is breakdancing on my bladder.

Ooh, fear not. I have mapped out

every bathroom in the arena. Oh.

Mm-hmm, and I packed a baggy of that sliced ham

that you go crazy for.

Mmm, that's what I'm talking about.

Yeah, come on. Give me some...

He's got a pocket full of ham,

and I'm getting grief about khakis?

Marty, that is so nice to see.

I know you and Courtney are just friends,

but you're such a good pregnancy partner.

Just like I was. Chip off the old block.

Really? 'Cause that's not how I remember the old block.

Okay. Okay. Are you comfortable?

I'm supposed to make you comfortable.

Do I look comfortable to you?

And stop touching my pillow!

Mr. Butler, the baby's coming.

He's crowning. Look.

Uh, you-you know what?

Uh, I'm good. I'm good.

You, uh, you, you do that.

I-I mean, you're the one that went to medical school

and everything.

Calvin. Calvin, Calvin, Calvin!

Get the camera ready!

Okay, okay. All right, um...

Okay. Uh, doctor,

um, you... you think while you're down there,

you could, you could get some footage for me?

I'm kind of busy right now.

Nurse, forceps?

All right. Okay.

All right, I got it, baby.

I got it. - We gonna see it. - Ooh!

- We gonna see it. - Calvin! Calvin!

Here we go.

Oh, Lord, that's a lot of blood.

Oh, God.

I'm going down.

He wound up with a concussion.

And me and Malcolm got out of the hospital before he did.

Look, I was ready to go.

But you know, when you got good insurance,

they want to milk it.

As soon as I got out,

I did all of the fatherly duties.

Fatherly duties?

Mama said you ain't changed a single diaper.

I didn't change 'em, I bought 'em.

Guys, I have an announcement to make.

As a thank you to Calvin for getting us the tickets,

I have hired a driver

to take us to the show in luxury.

Well, all right!

Trey?

You hired Trey?

I am supporting a Black-owned business.

Trey, where'd you get this van?

Is it even legal?

Of course it is. I got it from the police auction.

Oh, God.

This traffic is terrible.

Not for us, baby.

Look what the police left in here.

Trey, I know that ain't legal.

People are getting out of our way.

Wait, so, uh, so, Pop,

you really passed out when I was born?

Calvin, come on.

You have nothing to be embarrassed about.

You know, sometimes we are just not

our best selves under pressure.

God,

I remember when we were pregnant,

we were exhausted.

"We"? What did you do?

Oh, Dave was very, very involved.

Ooh...!

What do you need? Ice chips? Water?

Let's just, let's just breathe.

Um, want me to sing?

No.

Twice was enough.

Ooh. Honey, y-you look hot.

Uh, let's mop that brow. Uh...

Sponge!

You don't get to say that.

Must you fight me on everything, Donna?

I understand - it's go-time in here. - Ooh.

Damn it, you know what? I missed that.

Do you mind taking your entrance again

and maybe saying something like "It's showtime"?

Dave. Stop it.

Okay, honey, you look tense. You know what?

Let me put on my special mix CD.

Toni Braxton's "Let It Flow."

Am I right, Donna?

You doing okay?

You want an epidural? Last call.

Yes. Make it a double!

Uh, Gemma.

We agreed that we would do this naturally.

We changed our mind.

I-I hate to use your words against you,

but you did say, "No matter what,

don't let me get an epidural."

You're right, you're right.

I'm sorry. Come here, honey.

: Give me the drugs!

I want the drugs right now! Do you hear me?!

Get her the drugs! Get her the drugs!

Donna, get her the drugs!

Check this out. You can still see

where Gemma dug her nails into my neck.

All the pain was worth it

because we got our healthy, happy baby boy.

I hate my life.

Well, he's healthy.

Uh, Trey, you can't go this way.

It says "Do not enter."

They just say that so you don't enter.

Were those traffic cones?

I hope so.

VIP entrance?

Are you sure we're supposed to park here?

Look, I don't care as long as we're close.

These shoes are cute, but they were not made for walking.

Uh, excu-excuse me, Trey.

Trey, uh...

if you get a parking ticket,

- that's on you, right? - Oh, no, that's totally on you.

You should have - read your contract. - Well...

Well, there wasn't a contract.

Damn it.

My bad. Sign right here.

- Oh, my God. - You don't have to sign that.

The name of your company is Ride with Your Boy?