Bad Date Chronicles

Where is Alison?

You're gonna be late for your date.

Relax, Erin.

The restaurant's right around the corner.

I have plenty of time.

Leigh, you have to go home and change first.

Take the blue dress from my closet.

Oh, and my yellow sweater.

What is wrong with what I'm wearing?

You're going on a date.

Your first date since you broke up with-

Aaaaah!

Don't say it.

He who shall not be named.

Thank you.

I just think you should look like you're at least trying.

This is so exciting!

Why aren't you more excited?

Because it's my first date since I broke up with...

I'm just trying to keep expectations low.

Hi, ladies.

Sorry I'm late,

I was stuck on a call with advertising just explaining

that The Richards Record is a serious, hard-hitting

online news magazine that deserves respect.

But I am here now and my full attention

is on my top two editors so they can pitch me new ideas

for the next edition of...?

The Bad Date Chronicles.

The Foodie Country Blog.

Hard-hitting news magazine

with a softer, more human edge.

What have you got?

All I'm saying is that I think you're overdressed.

It's our first date.

Exactly. You're setting the bar way too high.

Look, Brad.

She knows I'm the Styles and Trends editor

for The Peters Post.

I have to look good, ok?

I can't show up wearing ratty jeans and a t-shirt.

Hey. I look good.

Yeah, for the editor of a sport's blog.

Conner and Brad, my two favourite editors.

You say that to all your editors, Milo?

Yeah, but with you two I actually mean it.

Just don't tell that to Susan at the news desk,

it might break her heart.

Hey, Milo.

Don't you think that Conner is a bit overdressed

for a first date?

No, he's a style guy.

He has to look stylish, otherwise he's the sports guy.

Hey, I still think you're gonna regret

wearing those nice clothes.

Think fast!

Dude!

I've got an extra pair of pants in the car.

I will be right back.

And if you don't like those,

I also have two really good submissions

for this week's Bad Date Chronicles.

One is from Becky who's date brought his mother.

The second is Steve who forgot to put his car in park

and it rolled into the lake.

Car in the lake.

That'll make better headlines.

That is so depressing.

Do you know what we need?

A true love blog to balance out your Bad Date Chronicles.

True love?

We don't do fiction at The Richards Record.

Besides, nobody wants to read about happy people.

Happy people don't get page views.

She's right, Erin.

Not many people are into hearts and flowers anymore.

Says the girl going on a date tonight.

A date?

Well, I should really let you get going so you can go change.

See?

She's got a date with the Style and Trends editor-

Erin?

Over at The Peters Post.

Peters Post?!

Do not get me started about Milo Peters!!

Huh?

No.

No, I'm not going on a date like this.

Why not?

Because I look like a roadie for a hair metal band.

Well, maybe she likes music.

Conner, why don't you just go home and change?

I can't. I'm already running late,

the restaurant's all the way across town.

How's my phone?

Uh, it got coffee too.

It's flickering on and off.

Sorry, dude.

Just use the one on the desk.

I can't. Her name is in my contacts.

Why don't you just explain it to her when you get there.

You'll probably have a good laugh over it.

Hey, Brad.

She edits a blog called The Bad Date Chronicles, ok?

So if I show up looking like this,

I end up on the front page.

The Bad Date Chronicles?

Yeah.

Do not get my started about Alison Richards!

You know who Milo Peters stole his entire idea from,

don't you?

You?

Me.

I hired him.

I trained him.

I was his mentor.

He turned around, stabs me in the back,

and starts the ridiculous Peters Post.

She still tells people I stole her idea

for The Peters Post.

Like doing an online magazine is some brilliant idea

no one's ever thought of before.

I am so late.

Conner?

Do not give this woman any ammunition

for The Bad Date Chronicles, please.

Any more ammunition.

Yeah, thanks boss.

I feel better already.

Do not reveal any of our company's secrets,

but get him to reveal his.

Is it too late to get out of this date?

Stop. It'll be fine.

You won't end up in The Bad Date Chronicles.

What happened?

You are never going to believe this.

First, he was late.

Really late.

: And he didn't call you?

: No.

I was just getting ready to leave when he rushes up.

Hey.

Hey, hey, hey.

I'm sorry, look.

My car wouldn't start

so I had to get a cab and race over here-

: I thought he was a style editor?

: He said something about coffee and switching clothes

with his friend, and that he tried to call me

but his phone didn't work.

Then...

Julian called.

Ju- Julian?

Peters Post?

: He didn't make a reservation?

: Apparently not.

We had to wait at the bar for 45 minutes.

I- I came here on a date, I need you to help me.

: Why didn't you go some place else?

Because he said it was the hottest restaurant in town.

Ugh.

Typical trends editor.

Once we got to the table, things were ok.

Because all great love stories start with things going "ok".

You know what I mean.

I didn't feel any butterflies,

but he was charming and smart

and it was going fine and then...

Maître d' hooked me up.

I love it.

Oh man, this is... this is the best.

You gotta try this.

Oh, that's ok.

I uh-

Seriously, this will take-

: He set you on fire?!

Sorry.

In his defense, he did put me out quickly.

No, no!

Look at it this way.

At least you can say you felt a spark.

Yeah, it's a little soon for fire jokes.

Sorry.

Especially because I'm not even finished the story yet.

Don't tell me it gets worse.

Mmmhmm.

: He left?!

Leigh ): At first I thought was in the bathroom.

Or maybe making a call on his broken phone

but he never came back, so-

: No!

: Yes.

I had to pay the whole bill.

You are going to make him reimburse you.

Reimburse us?

No. I just want to dry off, accept the fact that

I'm never going on a date again

and eat my body weight in ice cream.

I will admit, this was not a great re-entry

into the dating pool.