The Hottest State

- Here's how the story was told to me.

- Just ignore him. - Okay.

Hey, hey, what y'all doing?

Say Jesse, how 'bout you talk Danielle out

of being mad at me?

And both of y'all hop in the car with me and Vince here,

and we can all take a spin into Dallas.

- We got school tomorrow, stupid.

Oh come on, Jesse.

We'll be back before anybody gets in any real trouble.

Y'all know Vince?

This here is Vince Harding.

Vince, this is Jesse, and that one's Dan.

Dan's a little mad at me right now.

- I'm not mad at you, John Jaegerman.

I'm just bored with you.

- Jesse, will you tell Dan that she's the only girl

I'll ever love?

- Jesse, will you tell John to please

think about that the next time he decides to steal a car?

- They didn't even press any charges.

They knew I was just goofing around.

What about you, Mr. Vince?

Do you talk?

I know a joke.

Well let's hear it.

Okay.

There's these two monks, alright?

There's like a regular monk guy.

- My mother didn't need

to hear the joke.

She was already dead bull's eye in love.

She listened to the sound of his voice,

thinking what a good father he'd make.

- And the guy says, "Well, I'm not much into fish,

"but I sure am gonna love working with you fuckin' guys".

- Come on, Dan, let's go to Dallas.

It's a nice car.

It's just a 'Cuda.

- Three weeks later,

I was conceived in the back of that Plymouth.

I was thinking a lot about that story.

I wondered if sex was easier in Texas

than it was in New York.

I wondered how my father had talked to my mother.

I wondered how other men in general behaved

when they were alone with women.

What will you give me for it?

What will you give me for it?

My heart is gold.

What will you give me for it?

My heart is gold.

What will you give me for it?

- You got religion, and you've got sex.

In between is theater, you know, it's where they meet.

"A Streetcar Named Desire", half porno, half church.

It's like Buddhism, the middle way, the razor's edge.

And my job, I'm like a Buddha savant.

You know, I mean, should we go to the brothel,

or should we go to the church?

Let's go to the theater.

- Sarah doesn't think men have vaginas.

Yeah, well, I agree with her.

What?

I said, I don't have a vagina.

Yeah, you do.

Hi, I'm William.

I'm an actor, so I'm totally full of shit.

Don't believe a word I say.

I just figured I should tell you that right off the bat

so you don't get disappointed later.

You ever see "Star Trek"?

The original one?

Well, I'm kind of like Spock in that episode

where he tells the replicants

that everything he says is a lie.

And they go, "If everything you say is a lie,

"then you're lying right now,

"which means you're telling the truth,

"which means you're lying."

And then smoke comes out of their ears,

and they malfunction, and he gets to escape.

See, you just seem a little stiff to me,

and I'm trying to make sure you're not a replicant.

Do you speak English?

(laughs) Yes.

- Ah, good, I was worried you didn't understand

a word I say.

- Don't worry, you're not that complicated.

What?

- You're not that complicated.

Ah, thanks.

Are you nervous?

No, I'm not nervous.

Why would I be nervous?

Okay, I'm nervous all the time.

I don't know why.

Me too.

So, you're really an actor, huh?

Yeah.

Yeah I got an audition for the movie version

of "Camino Real" tomorrow.

You ever read that play?

No.

Tennessee Williams.

Mm mm.

Me neither.

My lines are good, though, I read them.

- Well, don't you have to read the whole play?

Yeah, I guess I should, huh?

I tried, it's just really weird.

It's about a bunch of people unhappy

'cause they're not sure if they're living

or they're dead.

- Why do you want to be an actor?

I don't, really.

It's just the only thing I've ever really been good at.

I want to be a singer.

- Oh yeah? - Yeah.

You gonna be a star?

I want to be a musician.

Okay, that's cool.

- I don't want to be famous, you know?

I like to sing.

I want to do what I love.

Are you any good?

It's not important.

Are you any good?

I'm great.

Oh yeah?

Yeah.

I'm tellin' you, there's nothin' I can do about it.

I'm just great.

- Okay, well, do something for me.

My heart is gold.

What will you give me for it?

What's that?

Tennessee.

I'm just whoever I pretend to be.

You ever feel like that?

Like all you are is the person you were pretending

to be in high school?

Uh,

no.

But don't worry, you are somebody.

If you'd stop pretending, it'll come out all by itself.

Do you want to get married?

No.

I don't want to be an actor.

It's a little disappointing when your best quality

is pretending to be someone else.

I want to be somebody specific, you know?

I was born in Texas.

But I left there when I was eight.

And sometimes, I think if I had just stayed,

I could be a regular person, you know?

Billy, the lumber guy, or whatever.

Instead of running around with my head cut off.

Why'd you leave Texas?

My mom had wanderlust.

What about your dad?

I don't really know him.

Don't smoke that.

Why not?

- Because I'm thinking about kissing you.

Okay.

Good to know.

It's good to know.

- So you're gonna be a big movie star, huh?

- Yeah, it's my destiny.

- (laughs) God, you're unbelievable.

I try to be.

Born yesterday, but I stayed up all night.

This is my door.

You live here?

Yeah.

No shit, really?

That's my window.

My window looks out on your front door.

- Well, I just got to New York City tonight.

I'm staying with a friend.

- Come here, come here, come here.

Do me a favor, stand right here.

Okay.

Right there, just like that.

Why?

That's good, one second.

I feel weird.

What am I doing here?

What?