Saved by the Bell

California is my home,

from the majestic slopes of Lake Tahoe

to the less cool slopes of Big Bear

to the awesome beaches of Malibu.

I love it here,

and I have served this beautiful state

for the past three years.

Hey, Governor Zack.

You saved my life out there!

And those tax cuts really resuscitated my bank account.

How can I ever repay you?

- No need. Just doing my job.

California is where my story began.

I grew up in the Palisades.

I married my high school sweetheart, Kelly

and became a successful trial attorney

who always fought for what was cool.

My calling to politics came later.

As part of a scheme to get out of paying

a $75 parking ticket,

I decided to run for governor, and I won!

But it hasn't always been easy.

I've had to make some tough decisions--

decisions that have kept me

and my still smokin' hot wife, Kelly, awake at night.

As governor, my husband

had to cut $10 billion

in education spending.

And yes, that led to

some school closures.

But it also led to

reduced loan rates

for small businesses

and a bailout

for the fossil fuel industry.

And as a busy mom,

that's important to me.

Wait, Zack, I can't say that.

- But I believe in public education.

Kelly and I both attended Bayside High,

and we sent our son, Mac Morris, there as well.

School should be an awesome experience,

a time for kids to evade math homework

and torment their principal with no consequences.

That's what I had and what I'm fighting for

for every student in California.

We will figure this out together.

I'm Governor Zack, and I approve this message.

Hey! I figured it out.

How about give us the $10 billion back?

It's wild, Aisha.

It's like he doesn't get how crappy

half the schools in California are.

What world is he living in?

Ah, Bayside.

Hey, girls, you wanna go skinny dipping tonight?

I just flooded the gym.

Now, that's what I call a double date.

- Hey, Mac! - Hey, Jamie!

You ready for the big game against Valley this weekend?

- I wish. Coach says I have to

pass my geography test, or I can't play.

- Why is your book upside-down?

- I'm reading about Australia.

- You think you got problems?

I accidentally planned my birthday party

on the same night as my parents' anniversary party.

Okay, Lexi, hundred bucks

says you can't make them divorce before Saturday.

Oh, you're on, Preppy.

Oh. Well.

Time to go to class.

Ugh. Don't remind me.

We're climbing the rope in gym today.

- Oh, I wouldn't be so sure about that.

- Mac Morris, did you flood the gym again?

The volleyball team floated away!

Linda, call the Coast Guard!

Sorry, Principal Toddman!

Man, I love this school!

- * When I wake up in the mornin' *

* Alarm gives out a warnin' *

* I don't think I'll ever make it on time *

* By the time I grab my books *

* And I give myself a look *

* I'm at the corner just in time *

* It's all right, it's all right *

* Saved by the bell, it's all right *

* It's all right, saved by the bell *

* It's all right *

* 'Cause I'm saved by the bell *

- Good morning, teachers and students.

I know Douglas High isn't perfect.

The truth is, this place was struggling

even before the governor's latest budget cuts.

But I love this school,

and I know I can make it

a better place. - * Pick it up *

* Pick it up, pick it up, pick it up *

* Pick it up, pick it up * - Mm.

I'm sorry, can you

turn that off, please?

No problem.

Hello?

No, yeah, I can talk.

What up, man?

Um, that's why I'm running

for this year's Sophomore Class President.

'Cause it's not too late for Douglas High.

It's not too late for any of us--

Sorry, kids!

School's shut down. - What?

- Wow, they shutting down the school.

- Yeah, unfortunately, this isn't

a high school anymore.

I mean, the state will probably rent it out

so that TV shows about

high schools can shoot here,

but it's not an actual

high school anymore.

Uh, no need to panic.

You can learn everything

you need on the internet.

Take it all. - No--

Watch your step.

- Governor Zack! - Governor Zack!

- Uh, hey. What's up?

- You have provided no plan for the students

affected by your disastrous education cuts.

Mm-hmm, that is

a great point--thank you.

- Where do you propose these students go?

To other underfunded schools that don't have the resources

to handle the kids they already have?

- Look, I didn't want to close the schools.

I feel terrible for these kids!

To be honest, I needed to balance the budget.

I didn't know how.

I just Googled what they did last year,

and I did it again!

Come on, like, none of you guys

have made a $10 billion mistake before?

all: Boo! - Ah, guys, guys,

come on, come on, I know I can fix this.

I believe in public education.

I went to public school.

My son is a student at Bayside High,

and just the other night, when I was tucking him in,

he asked me, "Papa, why--"

- Maybe they should go there. - Hmm?

- Maybe the students whose schools you closed

should be sent to schools in high property tax areas

like Bayside.

- Well.

It's a little more complicated than that.

That's actually a great idea.

- Is it? - Sounds really fair.

Maybe you should be the governor!

Me? Yeah, right.

- I don't think he should be governor.

- I mean, I was a political science major.

- Yeah, okay, okay, hey. Yes, that is a good plan.

So I promise that all students affected by the shutdown

will be sent to schools in well-funded districts,

including Bayside!

There you go!

Yeah. Governor.

- So you're saying my daughter's

gonna have to take a two-hour bus ride

just to get to school every morning?

Yes, but I'm told the buses

will be equipped with a modest selection

of discarded magazines.

- And we don't know these people!

How can we be sure that Bayside's

gonna be a safe, welcoming environment

for our kids?

It'll be fine!

Who doesn't love kids?

- They gather together! They loiter!

I'm just saying, how do we know

we can trust them?

- Look, these concerns about a criminal element

are unwarranted and offensive, and for the record, sir,

you are currently on probation

for embezzling money from a nursing home.

- Hi, Jade Huntington-Snell, Tanner's mom.

I just wanna say that my husband and I

are involved in a number of inner city youth charities,

so we are really excited about the new students.

- Yes, as am I, and I think the thing

we're losing sight of is that these are kids,

good, bright kids just like yours,

whom the system has failed.

Couldn't agree more.

That said, I read a Facebook article

about an underground sex cult where the kids snort Baby Yoda

and worship the YouTube demon Momo.

What are you gonna do to stop this?

- I can assure you, we have a zero tolerance policy