Good Neighbor Sam

Hi. Hello.

You awake yet?

Mm. No, but I will be as soon as you give me another kiss.

Sam: Mm.

Sam, the kids will be pounding at the door any minute,

and besides, my mother is coming to take them to camp.

Oh, right.

Sam.

Jenna: Hello, mommy. Hello, daddy.

Good morning, mommy.

You're supposed to knock. Go outside, girls, close the door and knock.

Jenna: Can we come in? No.

Silly old Sam.

Come on, babies.

Come on. Ah!

- How are my babies”? Oh, you smell so good. - Their energy is beyond belief.

Min: Give me a big fat kiss. Hello.

Sam, I'll put on the coffee.

You wanna help me with the knives and forks and raisin bread?

Hooray for camp. Mm.

Postman: Good morning, Mrs. bissell.

- What a beautiful day. Harry: Morning, Mrs. bissell.

Hi

- Hey, good morning, Harry. How are you? - Fine, fine.

- Good. - Hey.

Oh, shut up, will you?

Earl: All right.

- Is everything okay? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

All right, be quiet, will you?

- Hi. - Good morning.

Earl: Hi. Nice to see you. - How are you?

Sam!

Sam!

Sam!

Sam, you awake in there?

Sam: Oh, for heaven's sake.

Yeah mm-hm-.

Sam?

- What? - Hi. Morning, Sam.

Hey, uh, I just returned your lawnmower. Thanks a lot.

Oh, and your duck.

That thing got loose again.

You know what happened?

This duck got stuck in our breakfast nook with no one to talk to but my wife.

I know exactly how it feels, baby. The same thing happened to me once.

Sam, about your lawnmower.

Very much appreciate it if you'd get your cutter blade sharpened

by next weekend, okay, pal?

Yeah

you need a ride downtown?

Min is gonna take me down. Thanks.

All right. Well, see you at the office later, pal.

Min: And don't go without your shoes and stockings or you'll get cold.

Listen, honey, this is about the fifth time I've told you.

When you let Gretchen out in the morning, put her back in the pen.

- Not again. - It won't happen again.

I didn't have time to fix your eggs. I will as soon as I get this stuff packed.

- Denise, let your grandmother in, honey. - Okay.

A lot of stuff to be taking to camp.

- I know, but they need clothes. Denise: Hello, grandma.

Edna: Hello. Min: Hi, mother.

Hi, min.

My goodness, they're taking all that to camp?

- Hello, Sam. - Edna.

Not dressed yet?

Hi, mother. Sweet of you to take the kids to camp.

- I've gotta go to the airport to... Jenna: Hello, grandma.

Hello.

What were you saying?

I've gotta go to the airport to pick up this old chum of mine, Janet lagerlof.

She's coming in from Europe this morning.

How's Sam getting to work?

I'll take him to the office. He can ride home with Earl.

Here's some coffee. Babies, eat your cereal.

Drink your juice or you're not going to camp.

Ah. Sam's made another one, huh?

He enjoys it. That's reason enough.

Sam's building a big mobile out in the patio.

Where the neighbors can see it?

Oh, for heaven's sake.

You like it? Like it?

What the hell is it?

It's free-form sculpture, like my others. Only this is a masterpiece.

When we have guests, they can sit in the living room and watch it move.

- Want me to turn it on for you? - No, thank you.

- Isn't that Jenna's old bicycle frame? - Well, yeah.

And part of min's sewing machine.

Well, you see, you're supposed to enjoy this as a total entity.

You're not supposed to try and pick out individual parts.

See, the idea of found-object sculpture is to find beauty and enjoyment

out of an arrangement of ordinary, everyday objects.

Sam, dear, if fooling with junk makes you happy,

then I say do it, no matter what anyone says.

- Thank you. - Mother, you haven't finished your coffee.

Oh, thank you, darling. We were discussing Sam's junkyard.

Oh, isn't it wonderful? Sam is so clever with his hands.

I just love it. Sam, it's a real work of art.

I don't know a thing about art. I just know what I don't like.

She didn't mean it. Why do you say those things?

Will you help me get the kids ready?

Who asked you? Min: Sam!

Honey, it's time to kiss them goodbye. They're ready.

Min: Jenna, that's not nice. - Goodbye, kids.

Min: You look fine. You look sweet. - Be a good girl, dear.

Denise: Goodbye. - Okay, in you get.

Edna: Goodbye, Sam. - Be good girls.

Do everything the counselors tell you. And have fun, because it costs a fortune.

Watch your leg.

Okay. Goodbye.

- Drive slowly, will you, please? - Bye-bye.

Jenna: Bye. Min: Bye.

There's nothing like a good old-fashioned grandmother

for the kids to remember.

Come on. I gotta get dressed. You gotta get dressed. I'm late for work.

I can't tell you how excited I am about seeing Janet again.

It's been, oh, I don't know how many years since I've seen her.

She has a marvelous accent.

She was raised in Europe and came over here for college. That's how we met.

Sam, would you mind if I brought her home for dinner tonight?

Sam? Hmm?

Sam, have you heard anything I've been saying?

Do you realize that I've been in the same traffic jam,

going to the same job every day for six years, and so have they?

Every day, all the husbands, we get up

and we take the same road into the same job.

We even dress alike.

We put on the gray suit and the hat, and that button-down shirt,

and the tie, and the...

It's like sheep.

Sam, that's not true.

You're not like anybody else.

And you're not a sheep. You've got character.

And I love you.

I wonder what's holding them up?

Sam, did you say something?

Here we go.

- I'm off to the airport. See you tonight. - Yeah, goodbye, dear.

Sam, are you depressed about something?

No, I'm just, uh, bored, I guess, going to work.

It's the same job and the same people, the same faces,

and the same community pigpen for an office,

doing the same stupid layouts for the same stupid ads, and the...

Sam, we do have two beautiful children, and we have to make a home for them.

I know that.

It's one of those days, and don't worry about it.

- I'm gonna be all right. Goodbye. - Goodbye.

- Is Earl gonna drive you home? - Yeah. Goodbye, dear.

- Morning, min. - Hi, Earl.

- Hi. - Hi, Sam.

- Have a good day, honey. - Bye, dear.

Earl: Phil, what's in the papers”? Huh? - Help yourself.

We weren't watching the same show.

Come on, now. Let's not be foolish about it. Let's go.

Burke: Morning, boys.

- Morning, Mr. Burke. - Morning, Sonny.

- Morning. - Morning, Larry.

- Morning, Mr. Burke. - Morning, Earl.

Phil: Morning. - Morning, Phil.

- Morning, Mr. Burke. - Morning.

Name?

Bissell. Art department.

Morning, bissell.

Good morning, Mr. Burke.

Man: Larry, I looked at that draft last night.

- Good morning, Mr. Burke. Burke: Good morning, Marsha.

- Morning, Mr. blatchford. - Morning.

Morning, Mr. boling.

- Good morning, Sam. - Boys, boys.

One moment, please.

Now, let's all stay on the ball today, shall we?

Mr. nurdlinger is coming in for a look-see

- at our billboard campaign, as you know. Man 1: Oh, yes.

Now, what we wanna do is to edge him in with the billboard campaign,

and then later, we'll slip him into some nice TV spots,

like our hertz "man in the driver's seat" commercials.

All right, let's give him a good show today, shall we?

We're ready for him, sir.

Man 2: The red carpet all the way.

Man 3: No problems, chief. - Thank you, boys. Good morning.

- Good morning, Gloria. - Good morning, Mr. Burke.

Sam: Good morning, girls. - Morning, Mr. bissell.

- Good morning. - Morning.

Man 1: All right, we're going for a take. Now, settle down.

Freeze off back there. No walking around.

Close that big door over there, will you?

Man 2: You ready up there? - You ready, Bob?

Man 3: Okay, roll it, please. - Roll it, Jim.

Man 3: Here you go, St...

- And action. Man 4: Here we go. Two bars for nothing.

One, two, one, two, three.

All: J let hertz put you in the driver's seat j

j let hertz take you anywhere at all &

j by the hour, by the day j

j by the week or any way j

j just let hertz put you in the driver's seat jj

let hertz put you...

No! Cut! What are you doing up there, you bum?

Listen, boss, this is the best I can do. I can't do any better than that.

Director: Put him in the driver's seat. - That's the first one I've dropped.

Dave, I'm very sorry. Next time...