black-ish

I was 12 going on 13

first time I saw a dead human being.

I was also 12 going on 13

the second time I saw a dead human being.

I was 13 going on 14...

Anyway, you get it. I saw some stuff.

But that's the thing

when you grow up in a situation like that.

It makes you closer to the people

you're living through it with, your crew.

My boy Sha...

Lover of carbs, destroyer of property.

Ronnie was the athlete of the crew.

T Will was our ladies man.

Ledarius was the wild card.

And Tony...

Tony was the glue, the peacemaker,

always wanted everybody to be cool.

In those days you wanted to be in a crew forever.

But then you grow up, you lose touch,

and the calls come less and less

until one day, you get the call that you never want to hear.

Tony's dead.

What?

That's two double-doubles, two fries, and two Cokes.

A couple more double-doubles.

And... fries, please?

And a couple more shakes.

Chocolate, please.

Not Tony!

Man. I can't believe Tony's gone.

I'm sick of all this violence.

What violence? He died in his sleep.

They shot him while he was sleeping?

Savages!

No, man, he went to sleep and just didn't wake up.

That can happen? That's a thing?

I sleep... every night, man.

Hell, sometimes, during the day.

Look, his mom said the funeral's Saturday,

and we're gonna chip in for some flowers.

So it'll be $7 apiece.

What kind of funeral flowers can...

You know what? Don't worry about it. I'll get them.

- Really? - Yeah.

That's dope.

I know.

Eating your feelings.

Classic stage one... denial.

This is not the time, son.

Okay, skipping to stage two. Anger.

I don't know if you know this, but I'm going for

my peer-counseling certification at school.

Of all the people, why would you test me?

I need you to share your pain

and sign my grief log.

10 hours of hands-on training,

and I can walk into any YMCA in the world

and set up shizz-op.

Sports, girls, drugs...

None of this interests you, huh?

Okay, okay.

Death can be hard to understand.

Sorry about your friend Tommy.

- Tony. - Tony.

That's my bad.

It's why it's called "training."

name of deceased.

Tony's dead.

Tony is the one that's dead.

Dad's friend Tony is gone forever.

Tony... dead Tony.

R.I.P. Tony.

Tony, Tony, Tony.

Whoo, here it is!

Jesus truly is everywhere.

Thank you for making this sweet potato pie for me, Grandma.

- This is gonna kill at the bake sale. - Oh, honey!

Bake sale?

Wait. Why... Why didn't you ask me to make you something?

It's a bake sale, not a bake throwaway.

Oh, my God! Grandma's pie!

Diane! Diane! Grandma's pie!

Come look at Jesus.

Okay, guys, guys. This is Zoey's pie.

But I can make you a snack.

Who wants celery?

Is she serious?

Mom, ask that again.

Say it out loud.

Okay, you know I can make things other than celery, right?

I can bake. I can fry.

I can use a, uh, uh, a pressure cooker.

Point to the toaster.

- The t... - The toaster. Where's the toaster?

- Th... It is... - Yep. Uh-huh.

Hey, hey. She doesn't know where is.

Mom's a working anesthesiologist.

She doesn't have time to bake snack pies.

Thank you, Zoey.

Or do arts and crafts,

- or iron our clothes adequately... - What?

Or make food that makes people generally happy.

Okay, that's enough, that's enough, that's enough.

No, I honestly think it's cool

- that you don't know how to do anything. - What?!

You're not asking the question "Can women have it all?"

You're answering.

- No. They can't. - No.

- Really, Zoey? - Yeah.

Okay, fine.

You know what? From now on, if you guys need anything, ask me.

Okay? Me.

- Got it. - Okay.

- Um, Mom? - Yes?

Can you ask Grandma to make some more pie?

Now, for anyone who's never been to a funeral in the hood,

no one does it like we do.

And that's probably a good thing.

Tony Thompson...

may your spirit soar high like this dove.

They could at least turn the ceiling fan off.

Oh! Why?!

You sure know how to stretch 35 bucks.

Thank you, Sha.

- Andre. - Grandma!

Pops didn't say you were gonna be here.

Oh, your father's a heavy drinker, baby.

- It's in the blood. - Yes, it is.

- I pray for you, Dre. - Mm-hmm.

Bar's open.

Ah, okay. Don't get too happy, now.

Hollywood Dre.

T Will! Ah! Good to see you, man.

You looking clean, boy. What kind of suit is that?

Uh, well, you know, I don't even know.

Gucci?

Uh... Damn!

Look, man, it was just a gift.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, how you doing?

- I'm great, man. Just had twins. - Oh!

Well, not twins twins,

but I did have two babies at the same time

from two different women.

- That's kind of like twins. - Right?

I guess congratulations.

Ha!

Ledarius!

Come on, man. Look at you.

Aw, you know I look awful.

I wasn't gonna say it.

Hey, man, what's going on?

I can't call it, man,

but I do got this new cement business.

I'm killing the hood with it.

I'm doing everything...

Sidewalks, driveways, walkways,

which are sidewalks mixed with driveways.

- Did you know that? - Okay.

You know that new stadium the Rams are building?

Yeah.

- I'm not part of that. - Ah.

Ronnie! Mm!

You didn't want to dress up?

I... You are dressed up.

- Yeah, this is new. - Yeah.

And just like that, after too much time away,

I was back with my crew.

Well, on that one, we got to go.

Strong move on them flowers, Dre.

Oh, man. It was Tony. Had to be done.

Guess we'll see you at the next funeral, Dre.

Yeah, let's be honest...

It's probably gonna be somebody from my family.

Or me.

Yeah, it's probably gonna be you, dawg.

You didn't have to say it that fast.

Okay, hey, look.

I don't want to have to wait till the next person's funeral.

Next week...

- let's watch the game at my house. - Word?

- Bring it thugh, man. - All right. Cool.

All right, let's do that.

- That's what we gonna do. - Indeed.

Barbecue going and everything?

Yeah, everything. We cooking everything.

- Yo, Dre. - Mm?

How was the repass?

Oh, man, it was cool. Thanks.

You... You? I-I'll take this one.

Uh, what's a "repass"?

Are you kidding me right now?

It's when everybody gets together

after the funeral with some food.

- Oh, a wake. - Oh! A wake.

Well, we call it a repass.

You guys just have to put rims on everything, don't you?

You know what? I'm feeling too good right now

to let you bring me down with your daily dose of racism.

I went home this weekend.