Chilli Laugh Story (闔家辣)

24th August, 2002

When I was 5, Mom and I visited her hometown, Chiuchow

The elders insisted on having a hotpot party despite the hot weather

All foodies say Chiuchow hotpot is all about Shacha sauce

But I saw no Shacha sauce there

All I could find was this chilli sauce

They said as a Chiuchow boy, I had to try this sauce

So I did and it burnt like hell on its way in...

burnt even more on its way out

Despite my diarrhea episodes...

Granduncle insisted that I'd get used to that sauce eventually

That's why he always brought us 2 jars whenever he visited HK

this chilli sauce has always been an inseparable part of my life

From that moment on...

our fridge has always been stocked with this chilli sauce

30th June, 2020

Until recently,

I was confident our music festival could be run in a way

due to the recently tightened rules regulations

on running large scale outdoor events in Hong Kong

Coba, please prepare the cancellation announcement by today.

As I'm saying...

I was thinking that...

I was thinking that, maybe we could...

call you hear me?

What's going on over there, Man?

Someone's at the door

Can someone get the door?

Answer the freaking door!

Sir,

why aren't you wearing a mask?

Because I'm at home

Wanna unmask to catch your breath?

You've got a parcel

Your address:

1st floor, 12 Hung Shui Kiu Main Street, correct?

Yes

Are you Mr. Alan Cheung?

Funny

You've got the name right and the address right

But I haven't bought anything

I don't shop online; how do I get a parcel?

Sign the form first?

What's in it?

Sign and see for yourself

I can't sign before I know what's inside

You'll find out later

I'll sign after I find out

Sign, then find out

If you don't want it... our company will return the parcel

Wait... get this straight

Get this straight, I'm not one of those BS clients

I only demanded to know what's inside...

I didn't refuse the parcel

You, however...

are clueless about what you're delivering

That makes you an BS deliveryman

I should file a complaint

And...

I don't shop online;

how do I get a parcel?

Uncle,

are you home bound and lonely?

I have an idea

You can call the office and ask them

You can sign for it now and find out yourself

Come on, it'd only take you one phone call

It'd only take you one signature

I can lend you my phone if you wish

I can lend you my pen

I have to know what it is before signing for it

I know what

What don't you just call your office?

Everyone has a hard time working from home

Who doesn't have an annoying dad thanks to the pandemic?

I'm not so sure

If anything, the pandemic has made my dad... better

When I was little, he was truly annoying

Kid, where do you study?

- I study at D-- - DBS! My son got into DBS!

He's a DBS boy!

Congratulations! What an achievement!

Indeed...

it's so hard to get into

this prestigious school

Sun Yat-sen was his fellow alumni

Stop it

Let's give him a big hand

Come on...

Come on...

Way to go, son

My dad is surely annoying

But my mom is actually harder to deal with

Because what she's concerned about...

is way more upsetting than my father's issues

What are you mom's concerns?

She's only had one concern

through the years

Thanks

I hate this flat, it got us into...

negative equity from day one

besides the high interest

Maybe we aren't meant to own a flat

I must buy another flat

I hate to live under a stranger's roof,

paying off someone else's mortgage

- Daddy - Yes?

Don't get chatty with that man this time

He did all the talking every time

I was always quiet

Mr. Cheung, Mrs. Cheung!

Hi!

This area is quiet and peaceful

Very liveable

My clients who moved here usually stay for good

One even got all of his relatives to relocate to this area

What a big happy family

Say Mr. Cheng, do you drive?

No

No worries

The minibuses are only a 12-min walk away

They run from 8am to 8pm, so no worries

Mom, you have a moment?

What is it?

What is it?

You don't like it?

You know what I do for living

Live shows don't even get started at 8pm

Honestly, I have no idea what it is that you do

You don't even go to office now

All the shows got cancelled

If you get sacked, we'll be doomed

You'll have no proof of income...

to get a first-time home buyer loan for us

Why must you buy a flat?

That's not the point, I just...

I don't want to live under a stranger's roof...

paying off someone else's mortgage

How is renting a home considered living under a stranger's roof?

You pay for it but it's not yours

- Mommy... - When you can't pay, you have to move

Mommy, when we bought the Whampoa flat...

was the commission rate 1%?

I don't remember

Mr. Lee said it has always been 2% for him

No point in arguing since I've never bought a village home

But I remember it has always been 1% for housing sales

I have no idea; it may be different for village homes

Mr. Lee knows best

Yes and I've been a village home agent for nearly 20 years

But I can't speak for city properties

Never dealt with any

We bought the Whampao Garden flat in 1997...

for $5.12M, at $7,390 per sq. ft.

I still remember our agent at the time was named Chan

He also lived in Whampao

He even cut his commission to 50 grand

I remember we sold the flat in 2006

The price was... $4,253 per sq. ft.

Mr. Chan said since we were selling a hurry...

he had to charge us the commission of 29 grand in full

Nowadays the price is way above $14,000 per sq. ft.

Yes, I remember it all; how often do I get to buy a pad?

Then again, I have no experience in village properties.

Are you done?

I'm done

What's your point?

It just happened that Mr. Lee and I were...

discussing the commission rate

How many times has it been?

Must you tell everything to everyone?

What's wrong with discussing his rate?

I'm trying to help save a buck

so that you can buy a flat

Let's go back to your business

Given the current situation...

why are you so determined to start a chilli sauce brand?

I aspired to be

an entrepreneur on my last day of school

How you fared?

I'm okay, I guess?

Hmm

And you?

Let me see

It's nothing special

You did... awesome

Yes

And you?

Don't have it

Don't bother, what's there to see

It's just numbers

Look far ahead

No one said Sun Yat-sen did well in school, right?

He never took the DSE exams--- so you outdid him

Hmm

Uncle, your observation is surely unique

And very inspiring

Many famous people did poorly in school

But they ended up being worshiped by millions

For example: Newton