Elsbeth

We're not taking care of the dead.

We're tending to your cherished loved one.

No detail is too small.

No request is too big.

Sadly,

it's not uncommon for people

to have multiple weddings,

but we only get one funeral.

That's it.

It has to be perfect.

That is perfect.

And doves. Purple ones.

Excellent choice.

I will consult with the dove handlers.

Is it true Arthur Greene & Sons

sent Nichelle Nichols' ashes

into space? The Star Trek actress?

Here at Arthur Greene & Sons,

we take our commitment to discretion very seriously.

That's why some of the most notable families trust us.

Like the Clintons?

Well, if that were true,

I know that my great- great-grandfather,

the first Arthur Greene,

would be pleased. He started

this funeral home in 1927,

serving Harlem's finest families.

He believed

a family's time to mourn is both private and sacred.

He passed this tradition down to his son,

who passed it down to my father, who passed it down to me.

Does your dad still work here?

He's retired now.

Hi, Pop-Pop.

Thought you might like a visit.

Russell.

How you doing, son?

I'm good.

I'm real good.

I'm about to blow up online.

Was anyone hurt?

Huh?

Oh, no, my YouTube page.

My numbers are growing.

But, um...

I need your help, Pop-Pop.

You remember N.D. Longacre, right?

World famous mystery writer?

You handled her funeral ten years ago.

Well, a lot of people don't think she's really dead.

Which makes sense. I mean...

How else would you explain Get Out?

There's no way some sketch comedy dude wrote that movie.

It's a masterpiece.

It had to be her.

Come on, Pop-Pop, tell me the truth.

That funeral you put on for N.D. Longacre--

it was a sham, right?

She's not in there.

My father's literally out of his mind.

He's got dementia.

He knew exactly what I was talking about.

She's not dead.

Man, you really got to stop

with these petty conspiracies.

Not conspiracies. Truth.

You know what you're doing could ruin us?

Does that matter?

Do you even care?

You're changing the subject.

Do you know how lucky we are to have this?

Do you know much our family had to work

to build this? Just tell me what happened

to N.D. Longacre and I'll go.

She died.

That's why people come here.

They die.

I was here when we put on

on her funeral, I should know.

Let that woman rest in peace.

I knew you'd try to silence me.

But it's okay.

There are plenty of people who'd love to hear what I have to say,

including the Longacre family.

They hate the story, because it's nonsense.

Then they shouldn't have a problem signing

an exhumation order.

You shouldn't mind, either,

if she truly is six feet under,

like you say.

Good night, Uncle.

Wait.

Okay, okay.

I'll tell you what really happened.

I knew it.

Oh, you not gonna believe this.

I'll tell you the whole sordid story,

but I can't tell you here.

We got to go to the graveyard,

'cause you got to see this to believe it.

And you better turn that phone off.

Oh, no need.

I keep it wrapped.

It's a homemade Faraday cage.

Keeps big tech off my back.

Want me to wrap yours?

Great idea.

Let me go get my keys. All right.

They say it's albedo modifications.

That's all just a scam.

Trying to change the weather and everything.

That is fascinating.

I got to read more about that.

I smell weed.

What are you doing?

Put that out.

It's just tobacco.

Listen, Ima need your help.

You up to dig?

Sure, but... (sighs)

can we dig in the winter?

Isn't the ground frozen?

Well, these are special shovels.

Really? Mm-hmm.

Looks like a regular shovel to me.

REPORTER (on radio): Less than two minutes after

deviating from its flight plan,

the private plane crashed in Rhode Island.

Five people are confirmed dead,

including Senator Bronstein's long--

Coleman Cremations.

Yeah, I have a VIP decedent

who has requested private cremation.

I'll need immediate, overnight service.

What's your account info?

I don't have an account, but, uh, the decedent's family

will pay extra for a quick turnaround.

If you haven't used us before, I'll need

your funeral director's license, financial paperwork,

and a signed death certificate.

Can you get me in tonight?

Sure. Which funeral home did you say you're with?

There you are.

You heard the news?

What news?

The private plane crash.

Senator Bronstein was on board

with his girlfriend and a friend from college.

Terrible tragedy, so young--

Do you know how soon they're arriving?

Still en route from the morgue in Rhode Island.

I called in the rest of the staff,

but Brenda's sick.

Well, we'd better get to work.

Uh, give me a moment.

Yeah.

Arthur?

I have Senator Bronstein's father on line one for you.

I'll be right there.

It's a government cover-up, I'm telling you,

they disappeared him. You're claiming

your friend, a man named Russell Greene,

is missing?

That's what I'm telling you.

Do you have his birth date and address?

No, but you won't find him at home

because something happened to him.

What makes you so sure?

We have a standing breakfast meeting every Wednesday

and today, he didn't show.

So I checked our shared location app.

Last night, he went to a retirement home,

then his family's funeral home, then a cemetery.

And then he disappeared.

Why did you and your friend share location?

Wh-Who are you?

Oh, um...

Elsbeth Tascioni.

Sorry to interrupt.

I just find it odd

that you didn't know your friend's address or birth date,

and yet, you shared location.

Well, we only became friends IRL this year.

We were in the same Internet spaces.

Our online community focuses

on media manipulation and alternative thinking.

You mean conspiracy theories.

No. Alternative thinking.

Russell and I share locations

to keep tabs on each other.

When you do the kind of work we do, you become a target.

Sounds like it's worth looking into, don't you think?

I'm not the one you should be asking.

Ah.

Missing conspiracy theorist?

I think he prefers "alternative thinker."

Well, you can go find him and ask,

but I'm not assigning a detective.

Okay.

So who's my wingman or wing person?