GAME ON: A Comedy Crossover Event

Mr. Iglesias is recorded

in front of a live studio audience.

Happy summer, and welcome to Mr. Iglesias' discount SAT prep course.

Well, not completely free.

I did bring you an apple.

Hey!

Great gift! A paperweight that rots.

Quick question. What does SAT stand for again?

Scholastic altitude test.

Yes, Mikey, it's an altitude test.

To see how high we are.

Really?

It sounds like a violation of our civil liberties.

It's actually a scholastic aptitude test.

It's a way for colleges to take all of your outstanding qualities

and reduce them to a single number.

Is it true that the nightmares

you have about sleeping through the SATs

last your entire life?

Nah... mine are almost gone.

Well, I have to ace the SATs if I want to live my dreams

of having rich kids look down on me at Stanford.

Toodles, everyone.

Hi, Whitney. Are you looking for the equestrian center?

Because we don't have one of those.

Totes adorbs.

I'm here for the SAT prep.

Really? I would've thought you would have taken a course

that was a little less free.

Well, I was enrolled in a real one,

but it conflicts with my family trip to the Tokyo Olympics, so...

Konichiwa!

I love the Olympics.

Oh, my Jamaican brother from another mother, Usain Bolt, oh-ho-ho,

he always crushes.

Shabba!

Really? Same father?

Hey. Your guess is as good as mine.

Yo, so, Whitney, uh, what Olympic event are you most excited about?

Shopping!

Tokyo has all my favorite stores:

Gucci, Louis Vuitton, Chanel.

Really soaking in that Japanese culture.

The Olympics are going to be on Chanel Number Four.

You see what I did there?

Hey, you know how athletes make it to the Olympics?

Practice. See what I did there?

All right, we'll make a leaderboard with a medal count.

It'll be fun. Each of you gets to be a country. Okay?

Uh, Kimmy, would you do us the honors?

I never shoulda told you I had good handwriting.

Well, uh, I... I... I call France.

Vive la résistance!

Hey, Lorenzo. You can be...

... Das Germans.

That is right, they are very fit and strong and eat schnitzel.

Grace, you can be Australia.

Yeah, that's right, mate.

It's gonna be a real corker.

Crikey, throw another shrimp on the barbie.

- And Whitney. - Speaking of Barbie.

I'll be America.

USA! USA! USA!

Can I be Switzerland?

I just want everyone to like me.

Ah, Switzerland.

A country with amazing chocolate and cuckoo clocks.

Trust me. Everyone's gonna love you.

Cuckoo! Cuckoo! Cuckoo!

And we know

I'll be representing the government yard

down in Trenchtown, Jamaica! Irie!

Okay, can we wrap up the Opening Ceremony

so the competition can begin?

Relax. Open up your booklets.

It's just a practice test

that will determine the rest of your lives. Ready, go!

Woo!

And pencils down.

But... But I'm not finished!

Easy, Switzerland. Much like your cheese,

it's okay if your practice test has a few holes in it.

There's no way I got above a 60.

You get 400 points just for writing your name.

Nice.

Hey, maybe I don't need this class.

Wait, 400 points just for writing our names?

Is that socialism, 'cause I love it.

Hey, USA, I know you're used to playing by your own rules,

but I said pencils down.

I have a condition. I get unlimited time on these tests.

One of my dad's doctor friends gave me a note.

And what condition do you have?

PPD?

Privileged Princess Disorder?

It's no joke.

It's called arrhythmia.

Wait, no rhythmia.

Oh. I can't remember. It's in the note.

Is one of the symptoms having no idea what it's called?

Yeah, I got a name for it.

Bull-dookie-itis, you know what I'm saying?

No, you shouldn't get extra time

just because your dad knows a doctor.

It's not fair to the rest of us.

Yeah, you have no idea how hard we work.

I know exactly how hard you work.

Thank you, Mr. Iglesias.

See?

Look, it's totally fair.

We all just use whatever we have to get where we want to be.

That's America.

Well, what if you don't have anything?

Then you're screwed.

That's also America.

Yo, Mr. Iglesias. What do you think about this?

I think I gave the wrong answer when I said,

"Sure, I'll teach the SAT prep.

Sounds fun".

How's the SAT prep going, Gaber?

Oh, worth every penny,

which is more than I'm getting paid.

Ah! The SATs...

a test for all students of all origins

based on the words white parents use around the house.

I don't know. I found the SAT

to be an accurate representation of my cognitive capacity.

Oh!

Yeah, okay. Now I'm hearing it.

So, Whitney Carson got a fake doctor's note

so she could have more time to take her test.

Ugh! Caucasians are the worst.

Oh!

What are you doing here, Tony?

I know you're not teaching summer school.

I'm just using the high-speed internet.

My stingy neighbor changed his password.

Ah, come on, bro. You saw it coming

when your neighbor changed his network name

to "stop stealing my Wi-Fi, Tony".

Now, I liked it much better when you respected me enough

to at least lie about it.

What're you doing online?

My Meet Your Hero entries.

Oh!

Meet Your Hero. Is that the charity

where disadvantaged kids get to meet their favorite celebrities?

Yeah, it's the, uh, Ghetto Wish Foundation.

Look, I want to meet Salma Hayek, and this is my shot.

I know we'd hit it off.

Yeah, I bet she's tired of her billionaire husband anyway.

Right?

But it's for kids, Tony.

Well, I filled out 937 entries.

Let's see some kid beat that.

Uh, I'd like to see some kid beat you, bro.

You can't enter, man, you're an adult.

Besides, you're not underprivileged.

No, I read through the rules on their website,

and they didn't actually specify an age limit.

Well, they must just assume no adult would stoop so low.

Yeah, clearly they haven't met Tony.

Look, you gotta see it from Salma's perspective.

Okay, she thinks she's gonna meet some lame kid,

but instead, she gets to meet someone

that she can really connect with.

Yeah, someone whose, uh, net worth is 3.2 thousand dollars.

Hey, where're you going?

Ah, to go teach an over-privileged kid a lesson about cheating.

That's what I love about you, Gaber. You never stop teaching.

Yeah, what is up with that?

Yeah, well, without me, my kids might grow up

to not know the difference between right or wrong.

Kind of like Salma Hayek's future boyfriend.

I knew you believed in me, bro.

Ah, the Wilson High School cafeteria.

Site of the 1993 food fight massacre.

You know, they say at night,

you can still hear the cries of wasted Twinkies.

What a tragic loss of snacks.

Rest In Pieces, Reese's Pieces.

What are we doing in the crap-ateria?

Well, I thought we could take a break from studying

and tap into our Olympic fever.

How about we tap into our study fever?

You know there's a vaccine for that?

In the name of Hugh Jackman,

Australia is ready! Wolverine!

All right, first event is gonna be

the cafeteria dash to the far wall,

so if I could just have everybody line up.

Line up!

Do I have to run in the qualifying heats,

or can America just start in the finals?

Oh, for Switzerland,

it's just an honor to participate.

Yo, this feels weird.

Jesse Owens should not be running for Germany.

You feel me?

I'd quit, but I'm already France, and I hate clichés.