Gintama. Porori hen

We excaliburlings do our work by being used as bloodsucking biological weapons.

But Maganagi is worse.

His staple food is swords, meaning...

He's a cannibal.

My bad feeling was on the mark.

That man wasn't Senbe the Manslayer.

It was his sword!

Looks like the one sword we really wanted to avoid

showed up in the hands of the one guy who shouldn't wield it.

Nothing vanished.

They're right here in my belly.

Both your sword

and this man.

Gintama

Slip Arc

The Strongest Sword, and the Dullest Sword

I-Is that...

S-Sogo?

That's not him anymore.

T-Toshi!

Damn, we were too late.

Hey, Kusanagi, could it be?

Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!

I'm amazed you had the gall to treat me, Cursed Sword Maganagi, as you did.

Nobody has ever mocked me so much. No vessel has been such a pain to take over.

You were the first, Master.

But your superhuman body and mind, rare anywhere in the universe,

already belong to me, Maganagi.

The strongest sword and the strongest vessel are now one.

At last, I have attained strength unparalleled across the universe.

He got consumed! That bro got consumed by Maganagi!

Capture him!

Wow, what do you think you're doing to one of your comrades?

H-Hey, Toshi!

Just trust me for now. That's not Sogo anymore.

Your stupid game is over.

We know what you really are. Throw that sword away.

What are you saying? I'm in the middle of a real-sword fight here.

If I threw my sword away, I'd get sliced in half.

And if you won't do it, I'll just cut you down myself.

Can you do it?

Can you guys cut me down?

Because I can cut anything.

O-Our swords!

I'm sick of eating dull swords.

Sogo!

Hey, you're going after the wrong guy.

I'm your opponent.

Hey! You're the one who went after the wrong guy!

Why'd you throw poop at my face?

I didn't. It got sucked in to your face like it was going home to where it belonged.

Whose face are you calling a toilet?!

I'm gonna kill him for sure.

Wait, Toshi.

Gin-san...

Stay away.

This is a real-sword fight. Keep your noses out of it.

Gin-san, this is no time for that.

She's right. Even if you want to fight, your sword's gone.

But I have a sword right here.

The best sword and wielder in the universe?

What's so scary about that? All they can do is cut.

We're the dullest sword and the man with the most constipated ass in the universe.

Not even you can cut us down.

All we've got is negatives!

G-Gintoki-han!

Maganagi...

No matter how much you corner them,

you can't sever the bond between Kusanagi and Scabberina, between husband and wife.

So-kun!

What's wrong, So-kun?!

It's already severed, though! She's not worried about us at all!

Even if you lose your memories, the vow between husband and wife...

The depraved memories of the ***** they exchanged thousands of times

will never vanish from their bodies!

In the end, they're only linked by dirty things!

Fool. If you fight at such close range,

you'll be forced to step deep into your enemy's reach.

And once I'm awakened, any sword within my reach is rendered dull and useless!

No! Don't touch him!

If you touch him right now, I'll be cannibalized!

Gintoki-han!

Don't touch the sword? Are you stupid?

That's obvious in a real-sword fight.

No way. He's seeing through all of Sogo's moves.

You probably don't get it since you change bodies all the time.

But for us, it's all over if we get cut by a sword once.

We won't get anything done if we hesitate, though.

When it comes to real-sword fights,

only those crazy enough to walk into mortal danger bare-handed are cut out for it.

Right, Okita-kun?

Actually, you're not him.

His moves aren't this easy to read.

What did you even take over his body for?

You little!

I don't know or care how many blades you've eaten in your life.

But I know that I've beaten many more than that!

C-Crap... Gintoki-han, I can't go on.

Th-The Viagra's effects r-ran out.

Huh? Wait a second!

You can't pull that now! And I don't remember giving you any Viagra!

Shaddup! I told ya my speed's all I got!

This is all yer fault for draggin' out the foreplay!

My foreplay doesn't take too long, you broken bastard!

Get it up already! This is way worse than just being dull!

You're basically a soggy Curl snack now!

Don't worry, Gin-chan! The cheese flavor is good even when soggy!

You keep your mouth shut!

You let the chance of a lifetime slip.

Thanks for your helpful advice!

His moves are getting sharper!

Did you think I can only control the body, the vessel?

My belly is filled with the experience and tactics of everyone I've eaten.

By the time I get used to this body,

I'll bring out more power than it originally had.

You know why?

Because I've eaten and beaten more blades than you could ever hope to!

Guess he's not called a cursed sword for nothing.

Th-This is bad.

He has to avoid contact with the blade. And Kusanagi-san's all limp, to boot!

I've gotta do something, or I'll lose here.

Gin-san!

That's enough! Stop it, you two!

S-Scabberina.

Oh?

Stop fighting over me.

I can't bear to watch So-kun getting hurt anymore!

Wh-What're ya sayin', Scabberina?

Th-That ain't your sword or So-kun.

That's Cursed Sword Maganagi, the one who put us through hell!

Shut it, geezer! I don't give a flying rat's ass about you!

All I care about is So-kun's safety.

S-Scabberina...

Did ya forget about not just me, but Maganagi, too?

I beg you, So-kun. Please stop...

Scabberina!

Maganagi, you bastard!

Kusanagi, it seems your blade isn't the only thing that's gone dull.

That girl hasn't forgotten a thing.

She hasn't forgotten anything about you or me.

She just never knew.

She never knew? What do ya mean?

Haven't you figured it out yet?

That scabbard isn't yours or mine.

It's your daughter, Scarlett.

Say what?

What does he mean, daughter? How do they give birth?

I don't blame you for mistaking her.

Scarlett does look exactly like a younger version of her.

Scabberina was already pregnant with your daughter when you were separated.

And she raised her all by herself,

believing that you three would live as a family again one day.

But she was a single mother.

It wasn't easy for a scabbard without a sword to protect her child.

So she chose to survive by housing all kinds of other swords,

even if it meant betraying her husband.

But by then, she was already drained and exhausted.

Wh-Why? Why do ya know all this?!

Isn't that obvious? It's because I saved her from the hell she was in.

In the place of a dullard who never came to help her,

I freed Scabberina from her suffering.

D-Don't tell me, ya...

The reason I'm here right now is to keep my promise to her.