The Good Place

Michael, a demon has infiltrated the group.

Not just any demon.

Trevor is a diabolical, sadistic agent of evil.

Might just be the single

most dangerous creature in the universe.

Who wants lemon bars?

It's my nana's recipe,

and they are just sinful.

Love 'em on my lips but hate 'em on my hips,

if you know what I mean.

All right, new guy,

coming in strong with free dessert.

You must be Eleanor,

the reason this is all happening.

I am.

It's so nice to hear someone say,

"Eleanor, you're the reason this is all happening"

who isn't a judge in small claims court.

Thank you for this, Eleanor.

It's a wonderful thing you've done.

Mm, happy to help you out, buddy.

Oh, we're doing a long hug.

- - Are you crying?

Sorry, I'm just...

I'm just so happy to be here, if that makes sense.

Okay, the five of us narrowly avoided death.

- - The operating theory

of this experiment is that...

So, I give them ethics problems,

and we scan their brains,

and we get a sense of their baseline moral instincts.

Right, then I'll show them pictures that trigger memories

of their near-death experiences,

we'll scan again, and see if we get a different result.

For example, I'll show Jason

pictures of a safe, a snorkel, and whip-it canisters.

Got it.

Also, what a grim death that would have been.

Darling, do you remember all the rules

about what can and cannot be worn inside an MRI?

More specifically, what if one's brassiere

is very thin, but also very pure gold?

I don't know,

but I'm in a similar "situ-aysh,"

because the sports bra I'm wearing

is kind of rust-colored underneath the armpits,

so I guess we'll roll the dice together.

Hey, Eleanor, do I have the right phone number for you?

You haven't responded to any of the dank memes I've sent.

Oh, yeah, I... 'cause I was laughing too hard to reply.

Okay, what's your fave?

'Cause mine's "Damn Daniel."

- Back at it again with the white Vans! -

Should we get started, maybe?

Oh, Mrs. Teacher, for my turn,

is there any way to get, like, extra radiation?

There is no radiation in the MRI.

But why do you ask?

Uh, no reason.

Jason, what do you got in your hand there, bud?

Nothing.

Is it a spider?

Yes.

Do you think taking a spider in an MRI machine

will give you superpowers?

Hey, it might work.

He already bit me a bunch of times

and gave me the power to swell up my hand.

- Oh, my God. - What?

Trevor.

Hey, Mikey, fancy seeing you down on Earth

completely illegally.

Sweet outfit.

Dick Tracy called.

He said you're a buttface and he's been plowing your mom.

Hey, well, Dick Tracy called me, too, first,

and he said he was about to call you

and say a lie about me

that was actually true about you instead.

Whatever.

What are you doing here, Trevor?

Shawn hacked the judge's system,

and we caught you cheating,

getting your four little cockroaches to meet up.

What, you think we were just gonna sit around

in the Bad Place blowing beefers

while you're down on Earth boning us in the meathole?

So why didn't Shawn just go to the judge

and turn me in?

Because this way's more fun, knuckle nuts.

First of all, I'm currently formulating a better comeback

to your Dick Tracy burn, and it's gonna devastate you.

Second, you're too late,

because when I did this experiment in my neighborhood,

every time Eleanor asked Chidi for help,

their bond became unbreakable,

and the entire group improved.

No, you're right.

There's no way I'll get one of these bozos

to drop out of an unpaid, rigorous academic study,

especially when they're doing it with me,

their overeager new best friend.

Well, I should head back.

You want to come with?

Oh, right, they've all seen you already,

so you can't show your face to them again,

so you're powerless to stop me.

Later days, dingus.

Dick Tracy called back on his watch phone

and said you better "watch" out.

Shoot, second too late.

Okay, uh, Simone's gotta analyze the scans,

so why don't the rest of you head home?

Good first day, everyone.

Hey, teach, um, do you think, maybe,

we could continue

the one-on-one lessons on the side?

I feel like last week, I had my own personal ninja master,

and now I'm taking tai chi

with a bunch of farting housewives.

Between the new project and my classes,

I won't have time,

but this is way better.

You're still gonna learn a lot,

and you'll have a fun group of people

to study with outside of class.

- But... - Hey, gang.

I just had a neat idea.

Let's all go sightseeing.

- Dope. - Yeah.

We can check out Sydney, get to know each other, bond.

What do you say, E Street Band?

You up for a Segway tour of...

Australia, mate?

This is a knife on the barbie.

Cool idea.

I'm just worried that, maybe, it's too cool.

I think I'm just gonna find the nearest bar,

have one or eight drinks, and hit the hay.

Even better! We'll all go bend an elbow.

Actually, I know the perfect place for homesick Americans.

Hey, dudes, welcome to the Cowboy Skyscraper Buffet.

Oh, hey, can we get the Florida table?

They absolutely nail the swamp stench.

Oh, someone's seated there.

But if you purchase our Manifest Destiny package

for $30, you can have anyone you want

forcibly removed from the table.

We'll just sit anywhere.

When your table's ready, this gun'll go off.

I think this is real.

So, listen up, y'all.

I was so excited to join the group

that I made sweatshirts.

You get a sweatshirt. You get a sweatshirt.

- You get a sweatshirt. - I get a sweatshirt.

"The Brainy Bunch."

Awesome! I love being on teams,

and if we're on a team now, we need nicknames.

Optimus, Bumblebee, Jazz,

ugh, Megatron.

That's what you can each call me.

Now we need nicknames for you guys.

Ah, this is the best!

I'm gonna get the first round,

and we are all gonna toast to Eleanor,

the reason we're all here.

- Yay, Eleanor! -

Oh, well, if you guys are celebrating,

I recommend the jalapeno poppers.

Hi, there, I'm Janet.

I'll be taking care of you tonight.

Can I get you started with some drinks?

Our specialty cocktail tonight

is the Fourth of July.

It's half an apple pie

blended with Southern Comfort and Coca-Cola

served in a Chevy hubcap.

Why don't you just go get us a round of beers?

Of course. Here you go.

Sorry. I will go

physically pick those up, I guess,

and then walk them back here with my feet.

But just so you know, I will be here all night

watching everything that you order.

So, Ellie, baby, brainstorm.

We should get a house.

Me, you, Tahani, Jason...

we should all go in together on a place.

- Roomies. - Roomies!

That is...

technically an idea.

I think it would be supes fun.

We could play pranks on each other for my vlog.

No.

We could do one of those ice bucket challenges

- that I sent you. - I don't think so.

Or maybe just a Harlem shake?

I like to cook,

- and I have been dying to... - Please stop.