What's Up Connection (てなもんやコネクション)

Director: Masashi Yamamoto.

What's Up Connection.

My name is Chi Gau-shin (Batshit Crazy)...

Born and raised

in Hong Kong.

A pure HongKonger.

I'm destined for the good life,

with a knack for the hustle.

...I own my home.

Around here,

the land is yours once you build on it.

That's how my gramps started here.

And now my parents, my siblings... we each have our own places.

Along with the others,

you could even call us a village.

Brother, you're awake?

Why don't sleep more?

It's better for your health!

- Dad! - Gau-shin!

Haven't eaten yet? You look weak.

Hurry up or you'll miss your plane!

Mom, you can go para-sailing in Bali...

Para... what?

Like, a speed boat pulls you while you wear a parachute.

Thailand has that too!

Sounds cool, and scary!

Bali and Hong Kong are close to each other.

Hey, don't go to Japan.

Stop nagging me.

You'll come back liking radishes

which'll make it impossible to fart.

I dreamt

that all your planes fell into the sea, wrecked and drowned.

Oh please!

Shut up! Kiddo,

- What did you say? - Cantonese.

Let's not start the day like this.

Dad, let go of her!

Pervert!

We were just messing around,

but then we all won.

I won a trip for two to Japan.

Of course I will go with Yaolan.

Dad got a trip to Thailand.

Mom won one to Bali...

I guess the god's are on our side.

Hurry up!

Stop rushing! I'm coming!

Don't stain the sheets!

I'll toss you overboard you shit!

They're so excitable... it's just traveling.

Hey, want to go again?

We love each other.

Proof? We make love eight times every day

before lunch.

That's how deep we love each other.

Did you know Harajuku and Aoyama are next to each other?

...Shibuya is close by too.

Roppongi is that way too!

I'd love to go to all those places,

but the itinerary is set.

The last day is free time.

We can go then.

Seiko Matsuda's opened a storefront there.

Let's go shopping.

We agreed to spend that time at Disneyland.

No.

Don't be like that... let's go together...

I'm going to Harajuku.

What's good in Harajuku?

Harajuku is no better than this room.

Well, I'm not going.

Don't be like that.

Let's go together!

Let's do our own things.

Since you like Disneyland so much.

I'm set on going to Harajuku.

Well I'm going to Disneyland.

And if you don't come with me, Sylvester will come after you.

You do as you like.

What is with you?

Forget it. I'm not going.

Hey, chill out, why are you tripping?

We leave tomorrow.

Hey, where are you going?

I told you, I'm not going to Japan.

You go on that lame tour yourself!

Hey!

Hey!

Congratulations!

You got the job!

You think I can handle it?

You'll do just fine...

With my English and Cantonese?

Anyway, you better get moving...

to the airport.

Your Hong Kong guest arrives in one hour.

Here's the itinerary.

Today?

No time to waste.

Name, photo...

...meals, hotel...

Just follow this,

...and bring the receipts!

Right now?

Car keys, car is right outside.

...Relax... you'll be fine.

Don't worry so much about the language.

It's the thought that counts.

Alright, Honey, am I missing anything?

I mean Mr. C.E.O.

Yes, Mr. President?

“Welcome Mr. Gua-shin Chi”

You came alone?

First time in Japan?

It's my first day.

What are you saying?

Uhh... You don't follow?

You are my first time.

You mean, it's your first time as a tour guide?

Yeah?

Yes, Yes.

- There's no one else? - Indeed.

You're my first.

I'm hungry.

Wha...?

I'm hungry!

What did you say?

I said, "I'm hungry!"

Please feed me!

My God, it speaks Japanese.

M-m-m delicious. This is... udon.

...Udon.

Could I get a receipt?

Receipt? Well, I...

Alright, ...Udon ...280 yen...

Thank you very much, come again.

Let's see... stand 'n slurp udon for dinner...

A light stroll through downtown...

Takoyaki for dessert...

Look's like that's it for today.

That's it for the day.

Let me bring you to the hotel.

Okay!

Hey, keep it down!

Oh, sorry, wrong room.

Fuck.

Must be that bitch Yaolan hexing me from Hong Kong.

Tomorrow Tokyo! Excited?

We are heading to Tokyo tomorrow.

I've never been before.

First time for you too, huh?

We'll have extra fun!

Where's my stuff?

I'm sure I left them here...

All my stuff is gone!

What's the matter?

Hey, where are your things?

My money, passport, ticket...

All my shit is there!

I just started, and now they're going to fire me.

Call the police already, I'm off.

International scandal? Big deal?

Agency's license suspended?

And I'll get 11 years for not reporting it...

Where else to go sightseeing, Mom?

Think I have nothing better to do, than to solve your problems?

Kyoto? What about Yasaka's?

Not Yasaka construction, Yasaka temple... they have a good mystic.

...and so, between bull & tiger...

What? Bull & tiger?

In other words Kimon, the devil's back gate.

Kimono?

No, not kimono, Kimon...

15 degrees due east, by 15 due north

...is where evil spirits dwell...

Which direction was that again?

15 due north...

Where are we going?

That capsule "hotel" is too sad.

Out of my benevolent heart

I've arranged something else.

A big mansion, if you will...

Hey Mom, can you put him up for the night?

Tonight?

Got to keep him from the cops

and the capsule hotel is gross.

You may enter.

Be back tomorrow.

I'll pick him up in the morning.

Hi!

What a doll... just my type!!

Let me take you to your room, come along...

This way...

Make yourself at home.

“WHAT YOU WANT, BABY I GOT IT!”

And don't worry,

that Yasaka mystic can find anything.

Once I lost a bike,

and she found it.