V/H/S/85

Holy cow!

It's time now for the 1985...

Cochlear implant is especially bright.

We see that the three-amp house device...

Like it. Let's put a little garlic...

If you want to talk faster...

Bottle or a miniature in the computer.

Lift your buttocks up and squeeze.

Squeeze, squeeze, squeeze.

At first glance, Rory was as American as a Happy Meal.

We know now that perception would change,

not only for the scientists who took on his case,

but also for the world at large.

Wow. Look at that.

Who is that handsome dude?

David.

Wow.

-Is that on? -Yeah.

Check it out.

Such a hottie.

Gross. That's my sister.

Give me the gun.

-Monica, right? -Uh-huh.

What the fuck?

Are you kidding me?!

Direct shot.

How's he gonna get that thing off?

There you go.

-There you go. -There you go.

And here we are.

-Hey, sis. -Are you gonna help, or what?

-Isn't that everything anyway? -Building the tent!

Yeah, we're building it right --

- Kevin. - Kiss my ass, Kevin.

Here we have a nice, ice-cold beer.

Take a look at the lake.

Ow.

"No swimming"?

Huh.

Yeah.

"Lake"...

E...

Eve?

Evic?

Ah.

Man, this place is gorgeous.

And there's -- that's Robin.

Oh...

This place looks weird.

Muddy.

Oof.

Oh.

What?

Whoa.

What are you looking at?

Uh, uh...

Nothing.

You were filming me.

I'm filming everything.

Do you want to try?

Sure.

Yeah.

Here. Oh. Oh.

Honestly, you know,

I thought it was going to be heavier.

Oh.

I, uh, found a dead squirrel.

Gross.

I want to see it.

Okay. Yeah?

Yeah.

It's right over...uh...

Hey, sis. You going?

No, I don't want to get swimmer's itch.

That's not a genitals thing, is it?

No. God.

Uh, we'll be here.

Hey! What are you talking about?

Let's go!

-Yo, Kev. -What?

You going to let me drive this beast?

Over my dead body.

-Huh? -Over my dead body.

- What? - Over his dead body!

How is it, Kel?

Okay. Here we go. Kelly's up first.

20 bucks says she biffs it.

You're on. You're on. I'll take your bet.

Kel, you ready?

Hit it!

Come on, come on, come on.

Yes, yes. Yes! Yes, Kelly! Whoo!

Hey, Jared, throw us a beer!

Come on.

Okay, Nolan Ryan.

Hey, Jared. Do you want to go next?

-Oh, come on. -Come on, bud.

Hey, Robin.

You want to try?

All right. This one's coming in hot.

Yeah, get it!

Oh, no!

-Oh, my gosh. -Shit!

Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. I'm so sorry.

No, no, no, it's okay. It's okay. Are you okay?

Uh...yeah.

I think I'm going to go.

You are?

Give me that gun.

Ah!

All right!

I can't get it!

You got to put your finger in the hole.

I mean, if I can't get the skis on,

there's no way I can water ski.

I don't think I'm going to do this.

Jesus.

Hey, Drew, can you take this?

Yeah.

All right. All right. You got it? Good. Okay.

Thank you.

Look at those two. So cute.

-Come on. -It's cute.

I'm going to pull the rope taut.

Then you'll go when you're ready.

Yeah, I'm ready now. Let's go. Let's do it.

-You got this! -Ready?

Go!

Got to lean back.

Otherwise you're going to dig in.

I know. I know, Kevin. Just. Just --

Go!

Almost.

You were up. You were up!

I know. I don't think I can do it. It hurts my arm.

One more try. You got to try one more.

Robin, you got to pull back.

I am! Kevin, fuckin' A!

Hey, guys. Someone's at the landing.

-Is that DNR? -I don't think so.

You see Jared and Anna?

That's weird.

All right, Robin, one more time, and we're going to go back in.

All right?

Come on. Come on!

Go, go!

She did it. She did it!

Whoo! Yeah!

What happened?

Is she okay?

Pull up closer. Hurry, hurry.

I got her. I got her. One second.

-Get her out. -Robin. Robin? Robin?

-Grab her! -Oh, shit. Oh, shit!

What the fuck is...

Dude, you're bleeding.

Shit, shit, shit!

Get down, get down!

Oh, God!

Holy shit.

Bro, are you hit?

Yeah. My hand.

My fucking finger's gone.

Sorry, sorry, sorry.

Kev? Kelly?

Kelly?

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob.

You got to start the boat. You got to start the boat.

Got to start the boat. You gotta start the boat.

- Start the boat. - No, I can't.

You have to, man, you have to. I'm fucked. Okay?

Shit.

Okay. Okay. Okay.

You got this. You got this. Come on.

You got it, Rob. You got it.

Just turn that key. Turn that key. Okay.

Okay. Come on.

You got it, Rob. You got it, man. Come on. Come on.

Rob, come on.

-Come on, come on. -Shit.

There you go, there you go. Fuck!

No, no, no, no, no, no.

What are you doing? What are you doing?

I'm seeing how close we are to shore.

Stay down, stay down. Down, down.

Here we go. Here we go.

Oh, shit!

Okay.

The shore is closer on my side.

Shooting is coming from your side.

How far is the shore?

It's a swim.

Listen to me.

We can use the boat as cover.

I'll tie the rope to the cleat and swim the boat to shore.

We're going to be okay.

We're going to be okay.

We just have to stay low. Stay low.