Parks and Recreation

IT'S MY NEW INTERVIEW OUTFIT.

LIKE, "HEY, NICE TO MEET YOU.

CAN'T WAIT FOR THE INTERVIEW."

UM, I--MAYBE THE H--

MAYBE THE HAT. - YEAH.

LOSE THIS?

TO WIN AN ELECTION, YOU HAVE TO BE GOOD,

AND YOU HAVE TO BE LUCKY.

BUDDY WOOD HOSTS THE NUMBER-ONE MORNING SHOW

IN INDIANAPOLIS,

AND HE WANTS TO INTERVIEW ME FOR A SERIES HE'S DOING

ON LOCAL ELECTIONS.

AND LAST YEAR THE FIVE PEOPLE THAT HE PROFILED ALL WON.

THIS IS A HUGE BREAK FOR US.

UM...HEY.

M-MAYBE WE SHOULD PUT A PAUSE ON THE FASHION SHOW.

WE HAVE TO GO OVER YOUR TALKING POINTS.

- KEEP GOING. I CAN STILL HEAR YOU.

- UM, OKAY, MS. KNOPE, WHAT IS GOING TO BE

YOUR FIRST MAJOR PUBLIC WORKS PROJECT?

OH, I DON'T KNOW.

BUT I BET THESE PANTS WILL WORK FOR THE PUBLIC.

- WHOO! - YEAH, THOSE PANTS LOOK DOPE!

- RIGHT? - OH, MY GOD, THOSE LOOK GREAT.

AND I BET THEY LOOK EVEN BETTER ON BEN'S FLOOR.

- OH! - ARE YOU HITTING ON LESLIE...

FOR ME?

WAIT A SECOND.

JUST TURN AROUND.

WHAT?

OH.

- IT SAYS "NYMPHO" ON THE BUTT

IN SILVER, SPARKLY LETTERS.

NYMPHO MEANS YOU'RE ADDICTED TO SEX,

AND SINCE IT'S ON THE BUTT,

THERE'S OTHER IMPLICATIONS AS WELL.

SO THOSE ARE A MAYBE.

*

WHO WAS LAURA MULVEY?

LAURA MULVEY WAS...

A GUY... - GIRL.

RIGHT. WOMEN'S STUDIES.

THEY'RE ALL GIRLS.

LAURA MULVEY WAS A FEMINIST FILM CRITIC WHO...

WROTE A MAJOR ESSAY THAT HELPED SHIFT

THE ORIENTATION OF FILM THEORY

TO THE PSYCHOANALYTICAL FRAMEWORK!

TREAT, PLEASE.

I'M ABOUT TO TAKE MY FIRST-EVER FINAL

FOR MY WOMEN'S STUDIES CLASS.

TREAT!

USUALLY, TESTS SCARE ME,

BUT THIS IS AN ORAL EXAM.

UH, AND IF THERE'S ONE THING I KNOW IS--

MY FANTASTIC-- IT'S TALK.

GOD, I DON'T KNOW. MAN, I'M SO NERVOUS.

I KNOW--I'M JUST GONNA CALL THE PROFESSOR,

AND THEN I'M GONNA GET ON THE PHONE

AND MAKE SOME FAKE BARFING SOUNDS,

AND THEN I'M JUST GONNA BAIL, SO GIVE ME MY PHONE.

NO! ANDREW...

THAT'S NOW HOW GROWN-UPS HANDLE TOUGH SITUATIONS.

- WELL, I-- - WE FACE OUR FEARS HEAD-ON.

- TOLD YOU--IF YOU CAN'T REMEMBER WHAT SOME WOMAN DID,

JUST TEAR UP AND SAY, "SHE CHANGED MY LIFE."

AH, THAT'S A GOOD CALL.

I THINK THIS IS IT.

BUT DO I NEED A HAT, LIKE A BOWLER,

OR AN EDGY SCARF?

NO, THOSE ENDLESS SCARVES

THAT COME OUT OF YOUR SLEEVES LIKE A MAGICIAN.

- UM...I THINK YOU SHOULD JUST GO WITH SOMETHING BASIC--

NO NONSENSE.

MR. WOOD, HELLO.

- GOD, HE IS MORE TIGHTLY WOUND THAN EVER.

- MAYBE WE SHOULD SEE IF HE CAN PULL THAT ROD OUT OF HIS BUTT

AND WE CAN HANG SOME OF THOSE OUTFITS ON IT.

- ANN AND I HAVE THE OCCASIONAL ROUGH PATCH

IN OUR RELATIONSHIP.

BUT RIGHT NOW, WE'RE REALLY IN A GROOVE.

WE'VE GONE 30 HOURS WITHOUT BREAKING UP.

OUR PERSONAL BEST IS 47 HOURS.

IT HAPPENED WHEN SHE WAS OUT OF TOWN FOR TWO DAYS

AND SHE FORGOT WE WERE DATING.

- WELL, LET ME KNOW IF ANYTHING CHANGES.

THANK YOU.

INTERVIEW'S OFF. all: WHAT?

- BUDDY HAS TO FLY BACK TO INDIANAPOLIS EARLY--

SOMETHING ABOUT A FACTORY EXPLOSION.

- COME ON, DID ANYONE EVEN GET HURT?

SORRY.

- FIRST STROKE OF LUCK WE'VE HAD, AND IT'S GONE.

OKAY, WELL, WE JUST HAVE TO WORK HARDER.

I MEAN, GOOD NEWS IS, WE CAN CALL IT A NIGHT

AND GET A SUPER-EARLY START ON OUR DOOR-TO-DOOR TOMORROW.

OOH, THAT IS GREAT NEWS.

AND, YOU KNOW, WE MIGHT EVEN BE ABLE TO MAKE IT BACK

IN TIME FOR BORING CLUB.

DO YOU KNOW WHO THE PRESIDENT OR BORING CLUB IS?

ME?

- NOPE... YOU LOST THE ELECTION

'CAUSE YOUR SPEECH WAS TOO BORING.

- HEY, WHY DON'T WE ALL GO GET A DRINK,

BLOW OFF SOME STEAM?

EVERYBODY'S BEEN WORKING SO HARD.

- UM...WELL, WE'RE IN THE HOMESTRETCH HERE,

AND LOSING THAT INTERVIEW DIDN'T HELP.

I'M GONNA GO OVER SOME POLLING NUMBERS

AND TURN IN EARLY.

I SUGGEST YOU DO THE SAME.

- HEY, LESLIE, GIVE YOU A RIDE HOME?

AH, SCREW IT.

I GOT A NEW OUTFIT. MY HAIR LOOKS AMAZING.

AND I HAVE A SERIOUS EXCESS OF PRE-INTERVIEW ADRENALINE.

WHO'S GONNA DRINK WITH ME?

- OOH... - OH...

- SUSAN BRONWELL, OR B., ANTHONY--

WAS BORN IN ADAMS, MASSACHUSETTS, IN 1820,

AND SHE PLAYED A PIVOTAL ROLE

IN THE INSTITUTION OF WOMEN'S SUFFRAGE.

TREAT, PLEASE. - ANDY--ANDY, SLOW DOWN.

YOU'RE TAKING THIS CLASS PASS/FAIL.

SO I'M JUST LOOKING FOR A FREEWHEELING DISCUSSION

ABOUT, YOU KNOW, WHAT YOU GOT FROM THE CLASS.

OH. OKAY.

I WOULD SAY WHAT I FIND VERY COOL

ABOUT SUSAN B. ANTHONY IS...

HOW...

SHE WAS BORN IN ADAMS, MASSACHUSETTS,

IN 1820.

YOU KNOW?

JUST ONE MAN'S OPINION.

I PASSED! I GOT A "P"!

- CONGRATS, BABE. - YEAH! MMM!

I WAS HOPING FOR A P-PLUS, BUT THAT DOES NOT EXIST.

RIGHT? - RIGHT.

- YES, SO, BASICALLY, BEST GRADE IN THE CLASS--

TIED FOR THE BEST GRADE IN THE CLASS.

RON, I AM A COLLEGE GRADUATE NOW.

- NO, YOU'RE NOT. - I'M A COLLEGE COURSE...

GRADUATE, AND IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF YOU.

IT'S MY PLEASURE, SON.

I'M REALLY PROUD OF YOU.

HOW ABOUT A STEAK?

- YEAH! - YOU GUYS HAVE A GOOD TIME.

- OH, PROFESSOR, WHY DON'T YOU COME WITH US?

IS THAT COOL? - SURE.

- WE'LL LET YOU PAY FOR YOUR OWN FOOD,

BECAUSE OF EQUALITY.

- I GUESS NOW THAT THE CLASS IS OVER,

THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH IT.

ARE YOU GONNA WEAR THAT?

OKAY, I'M CALLING IT.

I HAVE A DATE WITH MY BATHTUB,

A GLASS OF RED WINE,

AND A GIGANTIC FIREMAN NAMED MARCUS.

- I'M GONNA KEEP PLUGGING AWAY FOR A BIT.

- YOU DON'T MIND THIS WORK, DO YOU?

- UH-UH. I LIKE IT.

IT MAKES SENSE TO ME.

- MMM. THIS WAS SUCH A GOOD IDEA.

SHOULD WE GET ANOTHER ROUND?

- UM... I THINK WE SHOULD GET

A MORE BASIC, NO-NONSENSE BEVERAGE.

- UH...MAYBE WE SHOULD ALL JUST DRINK

SENSIBLE PORTIONS OF MILK.

- I MEAN, I LOVE HIM. IT'S JUST...

THIS CAMPAIGN HAS TURNED FUN, DORKY BEN

INTO GRUMPY, STRESS-BALL BEN. - MM.

- IT'S LIKE DEALING WITH A STRICT MOTHER

WHO I AM CONFUSINGLY ATTRACTED TO.

- MM. - BEN IS LIKE A MILF.

- YOU JUST NEED TO BLOW OFF SOME STEAM.

HE SHOULD JUST GET THAT. - YEAH.

- YOU'RE LESLIE KNOPE! - RIGHT!

- NO ONE TAKES THIS MORE SERIOUSLY THAN YOU DO!

- TELL ME ABOUT IT! - YES!

- TEQUILA SHOTS? all: OHH!

TO KNOPE 2012.

MM.

AHH.

DING-DONG.

OH.

HELLO. LADY KNOPE.

I MEAN LESLIE KNOPE.

- HEY. - OH, HEY, BEN.

WHERE ARE YOU?

- I'M IN, UH, THE HOUSE WATCHING TV RIGHT NOW.

I'M WATCHING, UM... - MURDER SHE WROTE.

- MURDER SHE WROTE. I'M WATCHING MURDER SHE WROTE.

- AMAZING NEWS--BUDDY WOOD'S FLIGHT WAS DELAYED.

SO, IF WE CAN GET TO THE AIRPORT RIGHT NOW,

THE INTERVIEW'S BACK ON.

WHAT? WOW!

WHAT COULD BE WRONG WITH THAT?

NOTHING.

ANYWAY, HERE COMES ME...

TO THE AIRPORT. - GREAT.

I'LL SEE YOU THERE... AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

OKAY, BYE.