Younger

I'm gonna get the 900 no matter how long it takes.

I'm just gonna put on a diaper

and sit here till tomorrow.

You can't afford diapers.

I never said I was gonna buy one.

Anything could be used as a diaper.

- You want some of this? - No, no, it's okay.

I got a big day at work tomorrow.

- Oh, work's for jerks! - Lame!

- It's tomorrow. - Okay.

Oh, my God, dudes. This game is so old school.

Listen to that music.

Oh, yeah. Super old school.

Like, middle school.

Yep, just about right... right around there.

Hey, I remember when this game came out, man,

I didn't even skate or anything.

I used to skateboard when I was a kid.

I was pretty decent too.

Oh, yeah? I love that.

Just picture you in, like, tube socks

and checkered Vans.

And pigtails like "Punky Brewster".

Like what?

Uh, like... like a funky rooster.

You're so baked.

Uh! Come on!

You suck. Hey, Liza's turn.

Oh, no, no, it's okay. I don't play video games.

What do you mean?

My parents didn't allow them.

That's, like, child abuse.

I mean, you've played something though, right?

Like, Mario Kart at a friend's house.

No, I haven't.

What about, like, Candy Crush?

Sorry.

So you're a video game virgin.

Is that a big deal?

Not if you're Amish.

Look, okay, I don't want to be a bad influence,

so I'm just gonna take your turn.

You don't want to get started on this stuff.

No, you're not.

Take this. Here.

It's easy once you get a hang of it.

Grab the controller.

Firmly?

Yeah, firmly.

This... this button right here

makes you move forward and backward.

I like moving forward and backward.

And what does this button on the tip do?

What if I touch

just the tip?

Yeah.

It's all yours, big guy.

What happened to the door?

Oh, we... we broke it wrestling.

We're using it as a table.

You should've totally been there.

Next time.

We can't. They're right there.

They're fine.

They won't lift their heads from that game for hours.

It's fine, it's fine.

All right, I think I'm gonna take a rain check.

Or a door check.

Or we could go check the shower.

Mm, you have mushrooms growing on the tub.

It's okay.

I really do have a big day at work tomorrow.

Work is a four-letter word.

So is door.

Bye, boys.

We need a new door.

Skinny cap,

low foam.

And I got you both

bold control and high lift L'Oréal.

Oh, and Nina from publicity wants to know the exact name

of the honor Bjornberg is receiving at the PEN Awards.

The Scandinavian Prize.

And does PEN stand for "Poets, Essayists, and Novelists,"

or, "Playwrights, Essayists, and Novelist"?

She didn't ask that, did she?

Well, apparently there's some confusion on Wikipedia.

Apparently, publicity is incapable

of doing anything on their own.

Well, I think it's just because

Nina just had eye surgery

and her cat has a urinary tract infection, so she...

Liza, this is the most important literary event of the season.

Don't get sidetracked.

I need you to triple-check everything,

especially social media.

I have. All the live tweets you've approved are ready to go.

Did you check Empirical's table placement?

We have two right near the stage.

Good, I want the heavy hitters to see that we have Bjornberg.

Just finished the final edit on Anton's speech,

and I emailed it to you.

Is he nervous?

Only about finding the perfect tux,

so I'm going to help him now.

Black tie means black tie.

No color. This isn't the Grammys!

Is transportation set?

Yes, and all the cars have umbrellas in case it rains.

Good.

I need you to make sure Bjornberg

has a place to smoke after the red carpet,

pick up my dress from the dry cleaners.

Oh, Bjornberg's wife is flying in to surprise him,

so take the town car, escort her to the hotel,

and make sure she has everything she needs.

Bjornberg's wife is coming here?

Yes, but, shh, it's a surprise.

Kelsey, can you come and take a look at this?

Yeah.

Wow.

Wow.

Is everything okay in there?

Uh, yeah.

We, um, are just checking the fit of the... of the pant.

Go, go, go.

Okay, okay, okay.

They're great. We'll take 'em.

Excellent.

_

His wife is coming?

Yeah, aren't you glad I found out now,

before she just showed up at the awards?

Yeah.

Why would she do that?

Because she's his wife,

and she wants to share his life with him?

I guess I never really thought about his wife.

That was the great part.

She's in Sweden.

Yeah, no one ever thinks about the wife.

All the sacrifices she's made,

all the dinners she's cooked, all the toilets she's cleaned.

If this woman finds out about the affair,

she's gonna be devastated.

Girls in their 20s don't think about that.

"Girls in their 20s"?

You're in your 20s.

Yeah, but I'm very mature.

I spent a lot of years meditating.

I just don't get it.

What's in this for you?

What? Are you kidding me?

He's this brilliant writer

who happens to be amazing in bed.

I'm not gonna pass that up.

And by the way, isn't Anton's wife his problem?

Yeah, but who's problem is Thad?

If Thad and I are gonna be together,

I'm probably gonna be happy I had the affair.

I don't want to be one of those women

who wakes up at 40 and realizes she forgot to have a life.

Okay, Kelsey,

I'm your friend, but I got to tell you,

your adventure with Bjornberg has collateral damage.

- _ - And I got to go pick her up at the airport.

Thank you so much for meeting me at the airport.

Please, let me treat you to lunch.

I can't. I have to get back to the office.

There's, like, a million errands to do before the awards tonight.

You must take 20 minutes for a bite to eat.

I insist. Come.

Okay.

And the Linguini with clam sauce for you.

Thank you.

More jasmine iced tea?

Uh, please.

This is heaven.

Well, you assistants... you take care of everyone.

You deserve to be taken care of once in a while.

Not everyone thinks that way.

Well, I remember very well

what it's like to have these jobs in your 20s.

You're in your 20s, Liza, yes?

Yes, I'm 26.

You're so lovely.

Your eyes... they're very much like doe eyes.

Has anyone ever said that to you before?

Maybe.

My husband said you've been showing him such hospitality

while he's been here in New York.

The whole company is so happy to have him.

My Husband...

he started writing his new novel.

He sends me all the pages.

Wow, that's exciting.

Yes, it is.

And, of course, you know that

Anton always writes from his real experiences.

And this is about his experiences here in New York.