Resident Alien

Previously on "Resident Alien..."

Hello, asshole.

I have Asta on my side,

and we will find out why you are here.

You will tell me everything that you know about Harry.

I have him trapped. - I printed out this still.

This guy in the passenger seat is the key

to our whole investigation.

I'm not getting a lot of sleep,

thanks to the owl outside my window.

You just need to get out of the house for a little bit.

- I know the perfect place. - Yellowstone.

I have been trying to learn what the Greys

are doing on Earth, and perhaps the answer

has been in Mayor Snowflake's foot all along.

Yeah.

Hi.

My sweet girl.

Hi.

Oh, my sweet girl.

Hi.

My sweet girl.

No.

Ten more minutes, please!

No! Come back!

At least let me remember this time.

Please, let me remember!

You had no business dragging Asta into your mess.

You could have gotten her killed by that alien.

What the hell were you thinking?

I can't remember what the hell I was thinking

with such an empty stomach.

Should someone turn on the griddle?

That's your problem.

You don't think of anyone but yourself.

That is not true.

Other people will want pancakes.

Also, I'm wearing a shirt and shoes.

Where is my service?

Dad, yes, it was scary, but I chose to go.

She's OK.

I had her back, like I always do.

We were saved by a 12-year-old boy.

Not if I tell the story first.

I do not understand

why they are so upset about Joseph nearly killing them.

Every being must fight to survive.

Moths camouflage themselves from predators.

Cacti grow spikes.

Humans are no exception.

They forget they are surrounded by forces

greater than themselves.

Survival is never guaranteed.

I need to go.

Me and my empty stomach need to go listen

to the mayor complain about how his antidepressants

are ruining his sex drive.

I think therapy is supposed to be confidential.

Also, nasty. - I said "a mayor."

Some mayor from some other town,

who hates it when Sheriff Mike whistles to get his attention.

Uh, well, some other mayor canceled therapy

because they're going on a family trip to Yellowstone.

Yellowstone.

Yellowstone!

OK, now, we didn't get a match on the fingerprint,

so we got to go back to what we do have.

Now, tell me, what do you see here, Deputy?

Peter Bach driving the day he died

and a mystery man in a plaid shirt next to him.

OK, well let me introduce you to our unsub, Mr. Plaid, right?

Look how he's sitting-- upright, prepared.

And what does that suggest? I'll give you a hint.

It begins with the letter M. - Military.

- Mime. - That was my second guess.

A mime is a undervalued physical discipline.

Their posture's active even when they sitting still,

and you don't ever hear 'em coming.

We might be looking at a killer mime.

Or, thinking outside the invisible box,

what if he were military but served a long time ago,

which could explain why we didn't get a hit

on his prints, because of a backlog

of military archives?

Now, that's true, but there's just one problem.

There's no mimes in the military.

They got "Don't talk, don't tell."

Well, let's take our chances.

We need inside access.

You want to try your military connections?

No, I don't want to leave a trail.

Joseph served.

We can have him look into it, but he didn't come in today.

Well, we should talk to Detective Torres.

She has connections with every three-letter agency there is.

Nice try, Deputy.

Think you're gonna make a phone call

and trick us into getting back together?

Not a chance.

It's ringing.

Voicemail.

Hi, Detective.

It's Deputy Baker, over in Patience.

We were wondering if you could help us with a print

we're trying to nail down. We've had no luck with AFIS.

And by we, I mean me,

definitely not the Sheriff,

because he has his own life

and he's really...

horny? Really happy.

I mean, he's happy.

OK, then.

Call me back.

Have you tried writing with your other hand?

I'm sure--

Oh! Well, well, well!

Hello, Sheriff.

Came to turn myself in,

since I broke a few laws last night.

Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey.

All right. - Mwah!

- Oh, dear God. - Oh, so Mike?

Mm-hmm?

Uh, I would like for you to please meet my mom.

This is April. - Hi.

Doesn't she like so sexy? Look at that ass.

Show him that ass.

Everyone thinks that we're sisters, so...

Oh.

People are shocked to hear

that she's 14 years older than me.

Mm! I bet they are.

I've heard a lot about you, Sheriff.

Hmm?

My daughter tells me everything.

Everything. - Everything.

Gross.

- So Mikey? - Mm-hmm?

I wanted to invite you to my birthday dinner

this weekend, which will be so much more fun

with my very special plus-one. - Oh!

Don't we have that other thing this weekend?

- No, we do not. - Mm!

At dinner, we talk about her dowry.

You drove her off the lot. You got to pay for it.

Oh!

- Ooh! - It's spicy margarita!

Spicy mama-rita!

Yeah, that's--

OK. - OK.

- Mm-hmm. - So you'll call me?

Yeah.

You want to go to a party Saturday night?

No, I do not.

Mm, ah.

Now, go put the rest of your stuff in your backpack, OK?

Why are we going to Yellowstone in the winter?

It's freezing there.

Winter is the best time to go anywhere.

Seasonal depression increases suicide rates,

so fewer people are traveling.

We are going to have the whole park to ourselves.

It's going to be great!

Give you a chance to clear your head,

massage, rest, fresh start.

Hey, Dr. Vanderspeigle.

I heard you're taking a trip to Yellowstone.

I will be joining you.

Oh, uh, well,

it's actually sort of a family holiday--

Yeah.

Family.

I had a family once.

Two loving parents.

They promised to take me to Yellowstone to play

with the yellow stones.

I dreamed of us being there together in--

I want to say nature?

Mm-hmm?

But the day we were supposed to leave,

they died.

That's the story. They died.

It was sad. They're both dead.

Oh, yes, yes. That is so sad.

- Yeah. - Mm.

Maybe we should bring a doctor with us, just in case.

Uh, I think there are doctors in Yellowstone.

Mm-hmm.

What if you get in a car accident

on the way there? You both die on impact.

Max is left alone, hungry.

He has to eat the dead flesh of his parents.

If I'm there, he could eat me.

Not really sure how you being a doctor factors in there.

OK, you know what?

It's-- it's fine.

You can come with us. Yeah.

Ben's alien abductions are obviously

leading him to something at Yellowstone,

and I will be right there to discover what it is.