Jimmy O. Yang: Guess How Much?

Give it up for Jimmy Ohh yeah.

Look at you, beautiful people.

Oh my God.

No good, you guys.

It's good to be back.

It's good to be back seeing all your beautiful faces.

Give it up for yourselves, man, for being here tonight.

Thank you.

I love you guys.

Appreciate you guys and Asian people, where we had Asian people.

Look at you guys.

This is great.

I'm so proud of my Asian people.

There's so much excellence out there going on

a lot of people representing.

It's never been a better time to be Asian.

I say this every year, I know.

But truly, this is our time.

I mean, come on, we got BTS now, come on, that's us.

That's all people.

They're doing it.

I'm so proud of them.

Biggest band in the world,

probably ever since the Backstreet Boys,

and they don't have

to speak English.

I love my PTS, man.

Even white people know PTS.

Now.

That's progress.

That's progress.

Out of 15 year old white kid

come up to me

trying to explain to me the different members

of BTS.

He was like, ohh, this is Joan Cook.

He's kind of like the lead singer and that's Jim and he's really cool.

And he also raps, I'm like, dude, they look the same to me.

I didn't want to say I couldn't say it as an Asian person,

but they all just look like

me.

With pink hair.

I can turn the whole show to a BTS concert right now.

Alright.

Yeah, this is this is Jimmy.

This is Jimmy right here.

You don't know.

You have the, you know.

You don't know smoke like.

But no, I'm not.

I'm not.

I'm not gonna.

I'm not.

I'm not good at that.

I love my people, man.

I love BTS.

You guys probably heard in the news

they gotta go to mandatory Korean army, right?

The most popular people in the world,

they gotta go sign up for Korean military.

That's some gangster shit.

Imagine how scared you'll be

when you encounter PTS on the battlefield.

You're in battle.

You already kind of shook.

You had a field of grass

and a little puff of pink hair

just pops up.

Be like, yo, what the fuck was that?

Is that a Unicorn?

And then six more pink hair pop up.

Feel like we're surrounded.

And the last thing you see is just this.

That's some gangster shit.

I'm proud of my people, man.

I'm proud of my people.

You know, A lot of great representation out there.

I see some of you guys still wearing a mask.

I still wear my mask.

No shame in that, right?

It's all good.

It's all good.

I wear my mask not because I think I'm gonna get sick,

but because I just want to talk

to anybody anymore.

But I'm still surprised when people come up to me,

they're like, Oh my God Jimmy, I'm

like how did you know?

How did you know?

How many other Asian guys did you go up to?

Before it happened to me, me.

You don't know.

You don't know.

Underneath this mask.

I could be Aquafina.

You don't know.

And look, I'm not saying that all Asian people look alike, OK?

I'm just saying that me and Aquafina look alike.

And we both look like we should be in BTS.

Love all the representation out there, man.

But it's not just celebrities.

I'm very proud of that.

Everyday people out there representing.

That's the important part.

You know what I mean?

Ohh.

No no.

I'm very happy for this one particular person.

I'm really happy for that old Chinese lady in Chinatown

who's been wearing a mask since

1995.

Her life just suddenly made sense.

Before the mask mandate, everybody looked at us like, ohh,

why is she wearing a mask

that's so random?

She's not random.

She's a fucking trailblazer, OK?

She started wearing a mask.

Now everybody has to wear a mask.

She's like the Kendall Jenner of Chinatown.

She must have been so happy when this mask mandate happened.

Just laughing at everyone.

It's like, look at you idiots.

I told you to put on a mask.

No, the CDC follows me.

She's prepared.

She didn't just have a mask.

She had gloves on from when she's driving.

She had the full face shield that comes down looking like Daft Punk.

That's my girl right there, man.

Asian people were ready for this shit.

Social distancing.

We've been doing that for centuries.

Well, I got that.

Hugging and touching and all that.

You know, when we see each other, just a nice bound, that is.

That is socially distanced,

and if you're really Asian,

you ever see two really Asian

people, It turns into a bowling contest

to see who's more respectful.

To see what can bow lower

and a more way from each other

until you just fold it in half

and you go home.

That social distancing people.

That's right.

That's right.

But the pandemic has taught us anything.

It's everybody should be a little more Asian.

A lot of people in this country, Americans, you know,

like we're not ready for this.

All the rules.

We're rebels, man.

We don't like falling rules.

People are like freaking out.

They're like mess, man.

They no.

I'm like, dude, it's just a mask.

Just put on a mask.

They're like, it's not just a mask, it's the government.

Yeah, it's the government fear mongering.

I'm like, what is that?

They're like, yeah, it's fear mongering.

They want you to be scared of everything.

So you're obedient and you're scared and you follow the rules.

I'm like, ohh, that's called fear mongering.

Then my mom must have invented fear mongering.

Ohh.

I didn't know that's what it's called.

Ever since I was five years old,

my mom had me believe that anything I do would make

me sick.

You go outside without a jacket, you get the flu.

You go to bed with the fan on pneumonia.

God forbid you fall asleep with wet hair.

You don't wake up.

That's it.

You're dead.

That's it.

You're dead.

That's fear mongering man.

I'm not scared of anything anymore.

I don't think I have any fear anymore.

I used to watch that show.

Fear Factor.

You guys remember that show?

Yeah.

Joe Rogan hosted Fear Factor to make it face your fears.

Like jump off a helicopter, eat crazy shit

like pig intestines and century egg.

I ate that shit for breakfast.

This is nothing to me.

Fear is not a factor.

I do remember when I was like 10 years old little boy,

I was very scared because there

was one kid, pretty sad story in my class,

had childhood leukaemia and they lost all

his hair to chemo and everything looking real frail.

And I was really scared.