Harley Quinn

Hey, the guys and I were thinking...

...of heading to Mama Macaroni's

Whoo! Those garlic knots slap!

Don't get me wrong. I love me some Mama Mac's.

That pomodoro turns me into a pomowhoro,

but one day of pure focus

and we're going to be ready to terraform Gotham

into paradise.

Uh, so Frank "rising from the ashes reborn"

wasn't the key? He's floating.

Oh, I'm all-powerful.

Check this shit out.

Hmm, ahh.

- Take that, take all of that! - Wow!

Very cool, Frank. But in this current state,

he can only pollinate this area.

Please, I can easily get down with all of Gotham's flora.

No dick mist needed! You feel me?

Hey, Frank, you're asexual, so you'd be fucking yourself.

Well, I know I can do that!

Any-hiddly-diddly,

I just need to increase Frank's seed production tenfold.

And I'm so close. So if you could just--

He did it! By God, he did it!

Hey, Sy! Sy!

Aye, all this yelling reminds me

of Kim Jon Il's real funeral back in '98.

I downloaded Sy into Catwoman's Smarthome.

He can access the entire Internet.

Ask him anything.

Who makes the best burger?

Who won best actor for the 1991 Olivier's?

The horse, Seabiscuit, and a gay man.

-Amazing. -He's good.

Ive, ask him something.

Those are also the things that I wanted to know.

So if you guys could just--

There's 37 other rooms in this house, I'm just trying a--

It's okay, Frank. I'm fine. I don't need--

Okay, don't stop. That actually feels really good.

Ahh!

Oh, my God.

Harley!

What the hell is this?

Uh, just the first practice of Gotham's soon to be

greatest Progressive Alien Deathcore Band.

We are called The Blackened Pains of Zeerathan!

Death of Harroc can suck both my dicks.

Oh, they're currently the best PAD band in Gotham.

Don't need the acronym explained or repeated to me,

but it is like a touch loud.

Do you want us to turn it down?

I mean, if it doesn't ruin the vibe or whatever.

- You know. - There we go.

Hey, Ive, you're going to kick science's ass!

Yes. Rock on.

Hmm.

Oh, I'm seeing something.

Wait, I'm saying it's just you being a little bitch

and not telling Harley she's being freaking annoying.

Frank, I like to employ a tactic

called judicious transparency in my relationships.

Yeah, yeah, I heard of that.

It's called being a little bitch.

Hey, a big part of being in a relationship

is not always telling the exact truth.

And that way you can get what you need

without hurting anyone's feelings.

Also, I just blew up our last place,

so I don't really feel like being the bad guy right now.

-Oh, my God. -Well,

you better do something

or you're going to blow this place up, too.

Ugh.

Ivy is so smart

But she's no science wussy

And in celebration

I'm gonna eat her puss--

Oh, hey, babe.

Yeah! Whoo!

Obviously, and it goes without saying,

I think it's amazing that you started a band.

The thing is, um...

Catwoman just texted me

and she said that the instruments she stole

when visiting the legendary Rock and Roll Hall of Fame

induction ceremony in 2012, are off-limits. Dang it!

Ah! 2012. A great year for me

and my fellow Cosimo Matassa Stanleys.

Ugh! Catwoman is such a buzzkill.

Oh, I know! It's like the buzzkilliest.

If it was up to me, I would so let you guys

just shred... ass.

But, you know, she's letting us stay here,

so we just have to accept it.

-Ugh. -Ugh, stupid rules.

Yeah, uh.

Um, since we can't play anymore,

could someone get me down?

This election, stick with the mayor

because he's sticking it out for us.

We're getting crushed in the polls!

How is that possible?

Guy can't even piss on his own.

How's he supposed to run the city?

Eh, he's playing the coma card.

Well, our internals show 57% of voters

think it's "mean"

you're running against someone in a coma.

Ah! But the other 43 are with us?

No. 20 said they wish "you were the one in the coma."

Feels like an unnecessary detail.

And another 15 said,

"I don't get carpool karaoke,

they just sing along to songs in a car."

Clearly they thought we were asking about James Corden.

But regardless, it's not looking good.

All I've done for this city and this is what I get?

Maybe change things up.

Be more Jim and less Commissioner

Bingo. I need to just get out.

Chat with the youths.

Barbara, you're a cool, hip, popular young woman.

Gather up 3,000 of your closest friends for me to talk to.

Dad, I don't really have any...

That many friends.

Yeah. I could have guessed that.

Damn it! Ow, my pinkie.

Political campaigns are won with money.

Uh, what about great policy and hope?

Yeah.

No, we need money, from the filthiest, richest

pieces of shit the world has to offer.

Carmine Falcone, Ra's al Ghul,

or if we're really lucky,

Henry Kissinger!

That monster isn't dead yet?

God really doesn't exist.

Dad, if you take their money, you'll be beholden to them.

Run on what you believe in.

Justice! Honor!

The rule of law.

You, Jim Gordon, are enough.

Aww. You really are my north star.

Okay, so where are these rich assholes?

Harley, what are you doing?

Oh, don't mind me. I'm just gonna use Catwoman's

fancy Japanese toilet.

Have you read it? I haven't gotten past the cover.

Is it "I Q Eight Four"?

Konnichiwa, Harley Quinn.

Level.

-Level. -Ah.

I'll do that for you.

Are you ready to flush?

- Oh, my God. - Victory! S-level.

That was spiritual.

Everyone's gotta try this.

-Hey, guys-- -Oh, no.

Another text from Catwoman,

says no one is allowed to use her special toilet. Ever!

Wait, how did she even know?

Uh, so she has, like,

surveillance cameras like, everywhere.

I'm so bummed.

I want nothing more than for all of you

to just go to the bathroom right near me.

Ahh, stupid Catwoman!

What is the point of a fancy Japanese toilet

if you don't show it off? Argh.

Oh, that's some weak ass shit.

That feline freak.

Watching my every move.

Your free cam show ends right now!

Argh!

I did it! Whoo!

You diddled an electrical socket?

What? No! I finished the serum.

-Huzzah! -All right.

-Feels good. -Kudos!

-Pollination! -Feels good.

Oh, I'm so proud of you, my sexy little scientist.

But seriously, what is with the hair?

Turns out I made the serum less explodie,

but not not explodie.

So, Frank's currently in a fugue state,

producing enough pollen to cover all of Gotham.

And since we have a couple of hours before he's ready,

I thought that we would go for a celebratory dinner

at Mama Macaroni's!

-Whoo-hoo! -Mama Macaroni's?

Mama Macaroni's!

- Coming into my mouth - Her mouth

Mama Macaroni's

-Get in the town -So good.

-Okay. -Ah, yes.

Tomorrow we terraform all of Gotham,

except for Mama Macaroni's.

-Ah, yes. -Mm-hmm.

I'm gonna bring Frank his garlic knots.