GirlHouse

Hurry!

Get him!

Over there!

Where are you?

Gotcha now.

If you wanted to play house, all you had to do was ask.

Haven't you ever kissed a girl before?

Aww, it's easy.

All you do is close your eyes and pucker up.

Like this.

Mm-mm.

We wanna see what's down there.

I'll show you mine if you show me yours.

Come on, lover boy.

That's it?

Looks like an acorn!

- Mmm... - Hey, come back! Come back!

Come back, lover boy!

Bye! See you soon!

Help... Please...

Please help...

I'm sorry! What... I was kidding.

No... No! Please!

I'll do whatever you want! I'm sorry!

Please...

I'm begging you, I'm begging you!

No, no, please!

...Well?

"All right"?

Honey, this here is some Grade A prime rib.

We've been over this.

I don't have a choice.

You could always sell drugs.

- Oh, my God, what are you... Go back to your computer,

I wasn't done with my show.

Uh, okay, then get in here and close the door, I'm buck naked.

- Well, you better get used to it.

It is your new business attire. - Joke all you want,

but it's either this or drop out of school.

- I thought you said your mom could swing it?

- The tuition and her mortgage? I mean...

- Not without my dad's income. Not for long.

Well, breaking news for ya,

there are other ways a gal can earn cash

besides flashing her vertical smile all over cyberspace.

Look, Kylie, you're better than this -

and I strongly doubt your dad would approve.

All right, look; it's not prostitution, or even stripping.

There's no sleazy men slipping singles into my g-string while copping a feel.

Yeah, but it's porn, Kylie!

Technically. But it's not like skanky Boogie Nights porn.

I mean, it's just me and a few unmanned cameras

doing things I'd probably be doing anyways.

Metal and glass - that's all.

And a whole wide world

of douchebags whacking off on the other side!

Ugh... I gotta go.

Have fun with your little nudie site.

- My name's Mia. Welcome to Girlhouse. Come inside!

Come on, boys.

I'm so wet and ready for you.

Oh, yeah. Yeah...

Oh, oh... Oh, mm...

- Hi, you've reached the voicemail of Linda Atkins,

please leave a message.

- Hey, Mom, it's me. Great news... Um, I got

a part-time job working for one of my professors.

It pays really well, so I'll be able to send you some money.

Also, I decided to move off campus with some friends.

It's way cheaper and way more spacious than the dorms.

Oh, yeah, and, wait, here's the best part:

I got this scholarship that begins next semester,

so you won't have to pay my tuition

from now on. I miss you, Mom. Talk soon. Bye.

- Kylie Atkins! What changed your mind?

- Got my eye on a new pair of shoes.

My detractors say I'm just some smut pedlar,

preying on the weaknesses of young women and men.

I say screw them.

The fact is, I'm one of the fastest-rising entrepreneurs in America.

I'm no pimp.

I'm the Hugh Hefner for the 21st century.

- Um, about the pay. Can I really expect to make

as much as you said? - Minimum.

Anything above base salary is up to you.

We track every eyeball and every girl every second of the day.

You bring dollars, you get rewarded. Sky's the limit.

Now...

How do I make sure one of these guys doesn't end up stalking me?

- Today, Girlhouse is the most secure,

technologically advanced site of its kind.

My team of top engineers work around the clock

from an untraceable location to ensure

that Girlhouse can never be tracked or hacked.

Team, say hi to Kylie.

Hi to Kylie.

- Bye, team. With this little baby,

I can monitor and control every aspect of the site 24/7.

Cameras, microphones,

computers - I can block it all with the push of a button.

Girlhouse is pretty much the Fort Knox of websites.

- Um... How much of that is required?

Uh, nothing's ever required.

Everything and everyone you do is up to you.

Look, when I approached you in the quad last spring,

it was because I could see you were someone special.

I knew you had what it takes to be a hit.

Here we are.

Home sweet home.

After you.

- Steve. - Gary.

- This is Kylie, our newest resident.

- Pleasure. - Hi.

- Steve and Big Mike oversea security.

Along with the perimeter wall out back,

they're our low-tech last line of defence.

- How often do you have to turn people away?

- Uh, a few times a year some college chump

follows one of the girls home. No big deal.

- Yeah. Especially when you're an ex-NC State linebacker.

Okay, so now we're at this nice state...

Shit, Gary!

You didn't say you were coming by!

- And that's Kat. She's... Well, she's Kat.

Uh, we have over

50 cameras around the house.

I encourage you to utilize as many as you can.

So, like, hundreds of guys are watching us right now?

Thousands, at any given moment.

- Why do they want to watch all the boring stuff like this?

- Well, it gives members the sensation

of actually getting to know you.

- It's what makes us different from other sites.

There's our Kat. - These guys will fall in love

with you, 'cause they're not getting just the sex,

they're getting a full experience.

It's kinda like they live with us.

- Except each girl's full identity is always kept secret.

Members can never figure out where or who you are

in real life,

and if some random viewer does recognize you,

we block or delete any attempt to broadcast it.

Should we take the tour?

That's Devon, our main attraction.

Devon.

This is Kylie, our new roommate.

- A little on the wholesome side, eh, Gare?

Hope she doesn't devalue the product.

- She thinks you're competition. Take it as a compliment.

Come on.

Okay... That's Janet. She's doing

a chat right now, probably with a bunch of millionaire execs.

She's big with the Fortune 500 crowd.

- That's 'cause I'm all business, bitches!

This is Kylie, the new girl.

Hey, girl. Okay, boys,

you wanna see my spreadsheet?

- Okay... - Get that. Yeah!

This is Heather's room. She's the wild one.

Also the loudest in the sack.

When she's knocking boots you're gonna hear about it.

Literally, the whole house shakes.

- Hey! Gare, thought I heard you out there.

- Hey, Heather, this is Kylie. - Hey, hun. Pleasure.

Gare, you still owe me for that 3-way last week, remember?

- Oh, God, I'm sorry. I forgot. I'll get on that, okay?

- Okay. - All right.

Good luck, and live sexy.

Take care.

Okay, come on.

- Here it is. New girl always gets the third floor.

It's perfect.

- Here you are. - Hey!

I missed you.

Kylie, this is Mia, my girlfriend. - Hey.

Hey.

I know, I know what you're probably thinking,

"How do they justify living here, doing this for all those

sleazy guys out there," but we don't look at it like that.

The members may not necessarily be our fantasy,

but we definitely are theirs.

And they're not all creepy losers. You'll see.

Come on.

Bye!

And you all go to Selby College?

Are you kidding? I dropped out when I found out

how much money I could make here. It's ridiculous.

- Mm-hmm. No college for this girl. Gary found me in Vegas.

- Stripping, or... - No.

Making $5 foot-longs at Subway.

- Now she puts about 5 foot-longs in her subway

each week. - Yeah, for a lot more than $5.

Yeah!

Yeah, I go to Selby, but that's not where I met Gary.

I was in a bikini contest in South Beach,

he was judging. I offered to blow him for first place.

- ...And? - I didn't realize there was

a second judge, and I came in second.

- Okay, what about you? - What's your story?

- I'm from Topeka. - Mm-hmm.