20,000 Leagues Under the Sea

I say there ain't no monster.

But we need men.

And just to treat you fair and square, we're paying double wages and a bonus,

from frisco to Shanghai and back, all found.

All dead, you mean !

Don't sign with him, mates.

You can't buy off the monster with double wages and a bonus.

You'll never get back to frisco to collect your pay.

I got a man here that sailed on the golden arrowand lived to tell about it.

Come on, Billy.

Tell 'em what you saw.

It was the monster, all right.

A cable's length long from beak to tail.

And it came a-bellerin' out of the night,

with one big eye like a lighthouse.

We're stoved into starboard.

We're smashed to port.

And then it come up amidships.

And broke our backs and sunk us.

Forty poor sailor men drowned dead.

The point is, this thing is a ship killer.

It's a miracle old Billy's alive today.

- Tell 'em about its teeth, Billy. - As big as a mainsail, I swear.

And its breath... Its breath was like a furnace.

You got a pretty strong breath yourself, me easy-talkin' friend.

You mind answering a few questions ? I'm a harpooner by trade.

Monsters interest me. All kinds.

Keep away from him, you noisy sea lawyer!

I just wanna smell his breath. I can already smell yours.

Boiled down for his oil, lads, there'd be free grog for all hands,

if you can swallow it on top of his tall yarns...

There ! There they are !

- Stop it ! - Come on, Casey.

This is no place for a clergyman's son.

Hey, minnie !

Hey, Daisy, come on !

Let's shove off !

Hey, what are you guys doing to me ?

Don't bother unloading. Sailing's been cancelled.

Cancelled again '?

This is ridiculous. We'll see about this.

- Driver, you wait here. - Yes, sir.

Is it true about the sailing being cancelled ?

Unfortunately, yes, professor arronax. The crew deserted this morning.

We just have to get to Saigon. Isn't there some other ship ?

Not a thing. I'm sorry. Next.

Halfway around the world from Paris, and now this happens.

There's nothing we can do about it.

Except pack and unpack. That's all I've been doing now for a month.

Professor.

At any rate, San Francisco will have the honour of your company a while longer.

I'm from the bulletin. These gentlemen are from the globe and the post.

How do you do ?

We're interested in your opinion of this monster.

My opinion. Frankly, it's rather low at the moment.

But, actually, gentlemen, I don't know any more about it than you do.

Oh, professor. Just a moment.

Yes ?

Professor, what does the national museum in Paris think about it ?

I cannot answer that.

We heard this expedition of yours was to gather facts about the monster.

I'm afraid you were misinformed.

My reasons for going to the orient are purely scientific,

if I ever get there.

Professor, doesn't the giant narwhal reach a length of 80 feet ?

Why don't you ask a fish ?

If we could go deep enough,

we'd all be surprised at the creatures down there.

Could such a creature destroy a ship or drag it under ?

Well, it might if it were big enough.

Don't you print that. Please be careful, professor.

Well, gentlemen, i shall prepare a statement later.

You do not deny then that such a monster could exist. Ls that correct ?

- I'm not denying anything. - Are you sure ?

- What are you drawing ? - A sketch of the monster.

Thank you, professor.

- Good day. - Good day, sir.

Now put the wings on it.

Look what they've done to me. I made no such claims as this.

- Look at this drawing. - I knew it.

"Living horrors of the deep were described today

"by professor arronax of the Paris national museum."

Why, this is the most far-fetched nonsense yet.

Far-fetched ?

I think the proportions are about right on the monster.

You're not serious, professor.

I don't mean flying off with a ship in its mouth.

But the general size...

Come to think of it, it is a rather interesting conception.

Excuse me. Professor arronax ?

No more reporters. You've done damage enough.

Professor's very busy now.

I'm not a reporter. I represent the United States government.

United States government?

May I come in ?

- May he come in ? - Of course, sir.

- Please do come in, Mr. Howard. - Thank you.

I'll be brief, professor.

I understand your destination is the orient, and you've been delayed.

What if we could get you there, but by a roundabout route,

a cruise of three or four months through the south seas ?

- Would you accept? - I would be interested, yes, naturally.

Sit down.

Thank you.

I can see no reason why you and your apprentice

shouldn't consider yourselves guests of the U.S. government

until we can set you ashore at Saigon.

May I ask why have you honoured the professor this way ?

The honour is ours.

As the foremost authority on the sea, you can be an excellent observer.

Your observations will influence public opinion.

We can either confirm or deny certain rumours.

I knew it. It concerns the monster.

- Is that true ? - Very much so.

According to the papers, you seem to believe the rumours.

No. The professor's been misquoted outrageously.

Yes, I'm afraid I was misquoted.

However, I have an open mind on the subject.

All the better. Your reports would be unbiased.

You see, other nations, besides ours, are forming expeditions.

But I'd like to think ours has the advantage,

if for no other reason than you might consent to join us.

- That's very kind of you. - We accept.

Good.

If you don't mind, I'd like you to come downstairs

and meet captain farragut.

He's in command of the warship upon which you're sailing.

I might add that he has some rather strong ideas

on the subject of sea monsters.

- You mean that his mind is not open ? - Most emphatically not.

We headed south, and excitement ran high.

Every man aboard was on the lookout, and the watch was kept day and night.

Regardless of his own feelings in the matter,

captain farragut left nothing to chance.

With traditional thoroughness,

the Navy plan was to cut the south pacific into squares and search each square.

For the first month, we steamed in circles,

crossing and recrossing our course.

There was no sign of our quarry.

False alarms were common,

and they didn't help our morale.

Blow !

Off the weather bow !

For endless days and nights, we scoured the south pacific.

Our hopes began to wane.

It came as no surprise...

When captain farragut on the night of December 8, 1868,

summoned us to the war room.

Gentlemen, I believe my obligation to this legend has been dispatched.

I offer these charts in evidence.

They represent an accurate record...

Of three and a half months cruising under steam...

In search of a sea monster.

In my considered opinion, no such monster exists or ever did.

- Are you abandoning the search ? - There's no other choice, professor.

If we've gained nothing else, we can at least give the lie to those rumours

and make the newspapers retract their exaggerations.

It doesn't seem to me we have proved anything one way or the other, captain.

I don't feel justified in wasting further time.

My decision stands.

We'll set you ashore in Saigon.

Gentlemen.

Cheer up, professor.

You'll forget all about fishing when you see the gals in Saigon.

I thought they promised you a bonus if you harpooned this monster, mr land.

Knowing full well I couldn't collect it.

When I get back, I'm shipping out on the first whaler that'll take me.

I won't get rich, but I won't be sitting around, picking my teeth with my harpoon.

Maybe we are lucky. It might have sunk us.

You scare me.

Be a good loser, professor. The fish that got away is always the biggest one.

What a pity, professor.

I know you had visions of that monster mounted in the national museum.

Got a whale of a tale to tell you, lads

a whale of a tale or two

'bout the flapping fish and the girls I've loved

on nights like this with the moon above

a whale of a tale, and it's all true

I swear by my tattoo

there was mermaid minnie

met her down in Madagascar

she would kiss me

anytime that I would ask her

then one evenin' her flame of love blew out

blow me down and pick me up

she swapped me for a trout

got a whale of a tale to tell you, lads

a whale of a tale or two

'bout the flappin' fish and the girls I've loved

on nights like this with the moon above

a whale of a tale, and it's all true

I swear by my tattoo

there was typhoon Tessie

met her on the coast of java

when we kissed i bubbled up like molten lava

then she gave me the scare of m y young life

blow me down and pick me up

she was the captain's wife

got a whale of a tale to tell you, lads

a whale of a tale or two