A Teacher

‐ Oh, I...

I have to work tomorrow.

‐ Mm.

Hmm?

‐ Okay, sure.

‐ All right, be right back.

Hey, just, uh, two more of these.

You got it. Thank you.

Just put it on my tab.

Here we go.

‐ Thank you. ‐ Sure.

‐ This isn't so bad, you know?

‐ What? ‐ This, like, meeting up with someone online.

‐ That's the most romantic thing

anybody's ever said to me.

It is‐‐thank you. ‐ I'm sorry.

No, I didn‐‐I don't mean it like that.

I mean it's nice.

‐

‐ You're my first Tinder date, so...

‐ Really? ‐ Yeah.

‐ Wow. Well, now I'm feeling a lot of pressure

to make this go really well

on behalf of online daters everywhere.

‐ Well, I think you're doing great.

‐ Am I? ‐ Yeah.

‐ Thank God.

So...

When was the last time

you went on a date?

‐ Uh, like a date date?

‐ Yeah, a date date.

‐ A while ago.

‐ And when was the last time someone kissed you?

‐ A while ago.

‐ Mm.

‐ Hi. ‐ Hi.

Uh, sorry. Um...

‐ You all right? ‐ Yeah, no, sorry.

I have to tell you something. Um...

So I...

I got into some trouble,

um...

so I have to wear this thing, um...

It's just‐‐

‐ Oh. ‐ So...

Yeah.

‐ Yeah, I don't care.

I couldn't believe it when I Googled you.

Fucking your student.

You're a filthy little fucking bitch, huh?

You feel how hard that makes me?

Fuck, so hard.

Filthy little fucking teacher slut.

Fuck me. ‐ Say it again.

istant, indistinct chatter]

‐

‐ Hey, don't you, uh...

have class?

‐ I guess I overslept.

‐ Get dressed.

‐ I am dressed.

‐ No, dude, just put on some real clothes.

I'm buying you dinner.

‐

‐ Are you hungry?

‐ Thanks.

‐ Any requests for dinner?

I read in a magazine that planning out your meal

gives you greater satisfaction.

‐ Whatever is fine. I don't know if I'll be home in time.

‐ I've been thinkin'.

Have you given any consideration

to goin' back to Al‐Anon?

It used to help you, uh, I remember, before.

‐ Well, that was to help deal with you, Dad.

‐ Oh.

I...just know I value‐‐

‐ Dad. I'm fine, okay?

Just stop.

‐ Oh, I have your schedules for next week.

Don, I moved a couple things around so you're off Thursday.

‐ Thanks, Wyatt.

‐ Anybody needs me, I'm in the back room.

‐ Wyatt's the best.

Real lucky to have him as your dad.

You know, that's‐‐ that's me, uh,

on my one‐year mark there.

I couldn't have made it without him.

‐ Yo. ‐ Yo.

‐ Fuckin' hell, yeah.

‐ Mmm. ‐

So fuckin' good. ‐ I know, right?

‐ What?

‐ Nothin'.

‐ What?

‐ I, uh...

look, I saw the letter the school sent.

The one that you're being put on academic probation

and about, uh, losing your scholarship.

‐ Ha. You looked through my shit?

‐ It's on your desk.

‐ Not cool, man.

‐ I just, um... I just‐‐I just‐‐

I don't know, I feel like...

I feel like you got this different vibe

than you did at the beginning of the semester, you know?

‐ A different vibe. ‐ Yeah, you know, uh‐‐

‐ I'm fine.

All right? Seriously, I'm fine.

‐ Okay, cool.

What the fuck?

Shit.

They want me to get back to the house.

Fucking pledging, man.

Think you made the right decision.

‐ Well, if you need to go, man, it's all good.

‐ You sure?

‐ Yeah.

‐ Okay.

We‐‐we cool, man?

‐ Yeah, we're cool.

It's all filled out.

Um...

Both just have to sign page...

four and five, I believe.

Oh, and nine.

‐ Sorry, I don't have a pen.

‐ Oh.

‐ You seem good.

‐ I am.

Little rough... there for a while,

but things are pretty great now.

Recording an album.

‐ Wow. Cool.

‐ Gone to some pretty cool cities for work.

Dating and... yeah, I don't know.

As happy as I can be, I guess.

‐ That's good to hear.

‐ It's okay, you don't have to pretend

that you've been worried about how I am.

‐ I have been.

‐ You never would have done what you did

if you gave a shit about me.

‐ I made a mistake, and I'm‐‐

‐ A mistake.

Is that what you're calling it?

Wow.

Okay.

I don't know how I ever loved you.

‐ Matt, I'm s‐so sorry.

‐ Oh, fuck. I'm so mad.

I'm just so mad at you.

Can you go, please? Can you go?

ntry western plays in background]

‐ Hi. Five fuzzy navels, please.

‐ Make that a double order, please.

‐ Yes! ‐ Oh, perfect!

Oh, could you take a picture for us?

We're, uh, we're documenting. ‐ Oh, uh...

‐ Thank you! ‐ Okay.

‐ Guys.

‐ Okay, ready? One, two, and...

everyone say "fuzzy navel."

Fuzzy navel!

All right.

‐ Thank you.

Oh, we owe you a shot.

‐ ‐ Oh, no, that's cool.

‐ One more fuzzy navel!

‐ Uh...no, I‐I'm good, though.

Thank you. ‐ You're good with sitting at the bar

by yourself like a weirdo

and not drinking with five hot women?

‐ I guess I'd rather have a whisky than a fuzzy navel.

‐ Oh! Straight whisky for this guy.

‐

‐ Oh, thank you.

‐ Oh, wait, what's‐‐ what's your name again?

‐ Um, Eric.

‐ To Eric! ‐ To Eric.

‐ To Eric. ‐ Cheers!

Ah, cheers. ‐ Hey, Eric.

Whoo!

‐ Eric! ‐ Hey.

[music continues in background]

‐ Why would he write "cool" after I sext him?

Shouldn't I at least get a "very cool"?

We've been sleeping together for months.

Is he trying to backslide into a vague place?

‐ Maybe he just thinks what you wanna do is cool.

‐ This is what I said. ‐ Whatever.

You don't understand what it's like to date in LA.

You and Adam are like Tami and Coach Taylor happy.

It's disgusting. Oh, my God, I love Connie Britton.

Her hair is so pretty.

So pretty? So pretty.