The Flintstones

Wilma, we've been in 10 dives already, but this is the worst-looking.

- I'm afraid to go in there. - So am I, Betty.

But for the sake of the boys, we got to go through with it.

- Do you remember your lines? - Let's go.

- Hey, bartender. - Yeah, what will you girls have?

- We will have a couple of lemonades. - Yeah, and put it on the cuff.

Nothing doing. What do you think I am, a Good Samaritan?

Ain't it a shame, Shirl?

We got a fortune in stolen swag stashed away...

- and it's too hot to spend. - It's murder, Myrt.

Looks like we lost the police, Benny. You can take off your mask now.

Gee, Fingers, can't I keep it on?

It makes me feel like a for-real bank robber.

You are a for-real bank robber.

Where do you think we heisted this bag of dough from, a bakery?

Oh, yeah.

Ever since that last job when the safe door fell on my head...

I can't seem to remember nothing.

Well, try to remember to keep on the right side of the road.

It's the law! Step on it, Benny!

I'm all out of breath, Sarge. You be the siren for a while, while I drive.

There they are up ahead. Keep that siren going.

What's the matter, Barney?

Nothing, Fred. You told me to wake you up when it's 3:00.

Oh, yeah.

I left my watch inside. What time is it now?

- It's 1:00. - Well, then you have two hours yet.

- Go back to sleep, Fred. - "Go back to sleep."

Barney, remind me never to use your hammock again.

What do you mean, Fred? What did I do?

You woke me up right in the middle of a beautiful dream, that's what.

I'm sorry, Fred. What was the dream about? Money?

Naturally, I'm a married man.

- Yeah, it figures. - Boy, was I rich.

I dreamed that me and Wilma had servants waiting on us hand and foot.

- Was me and Betty in the dream, Fred? - Who do you think the servants were?

You mean Betty and me was working for you?

Yeah, but I was paying you a terrific salary: $1,000 a week.

That was swell of you, Fred. You're a real pal.

You know me, Barney. Easy come, easy go.

The cops are gaining on us. If they catch us with the loot, we'll be sent up for life.

- Yeah, and maybe longer. What'll we do? - There's only one thing we can do.

Turn the next corner, Benny, and I'll dump the loot overboard.

$86,000 down the drain.

And after we got back from the world cruise...

we built the biggest swimming pool you ever saw and filled it with champagne.

No kidding. Oh, boy, what a dream.

You never saw so many guests going down for the third time...

with smiles on their faces.

Don't you wish all that money was for real instead of being just a dream?

Yeah, I wish this one was.

- What happened, Fred? - Get a doctor. I can't see.

Get two doctors. Help, I've been killed! Call Wilma, quick!

Fred, look at this. It's a sack of money.

Will you stop yelling and get help? Don't just stand...

What did you say?

I said you got hit in the head with a sack of money.

It happened. It's a miracle. I make a wish and it happens.

Yeah, we're rich!

Where do you get that "we" stuff?

Well, after all, the money fell in my yard.

A mere technicality. Aren't you forgetting it was my wish?

And I gave you the idea to wish for the dough, remember?

For that you expect to be cut in? You are out of your lead-picking mind.

But, Fred, I deserve something. We've been friends for years.

Stranger, you do your own wishing.

- Wilma, are you busy? - Come in, Betty.

I'm catching up on some of my sewing. You know how it piles up.

I wish Fred would get me a modern sewing machine like yours.

You can use mine anytime you want to, Wilma.

Thanks, but you know how Fred is. He wouldn't like it.

It would be okay with me.

I'll be finished in a minute, Betty...

and we'll have some cold swamp root tea over rocks.

Swell.

- Not only that, but I'll sue you. - Sue me? For what?

How do I know? I ain't no lawyer.

Looks like Fred and Barney are at it again.

I wonder what they're arguing about this time.

Something silly as usual. Lets go see.

Let go, Barney. It's mine, all mine.

- No, it ain't. It fell in my yard. - So what? I was dreaming about it first.

That don't make no difference. I'm entitled to half.

Fred, what in the world are you two doing?

Wilma, I want you to settle an argument.

And that's just how it happened. So it's my money, right?

But it was my idea and my yard. So I'm entitled to something, right?

No, Barney, you're not entitled to a cent.

You see? What did I tell you? Your own wife admits it. It's mine!

$86,000!

Now, what's the first thing I'll do with all this dough?

Return it.

I'll get me one of those snazzy sports cars, maybe two.

One to go to work in and one to come home in, and then I'll...

Wilma, it sounded like you said "return it."

That's right, Fred. Return it.

You've been twisting your hair curlers too tight, Wilma.

This dough belongs to me.

Fred Flintstone, you don't really believe...

that money dropped on you because you wished for it?

- How could you? - It's easy. I force myself.

Besides how do I find out who it really belongs to?

Hey, Fred, how about putting an ad in the lost-and-found column?

You know, something like: "Found, $86,000.

"Loser may claim same by identifying the money."

Are you nuts? Anybody can claim the money that way.

Money is money. It's easy to describe.

Then take it to the police. They'll find the owner.

But, Wilma...

Go on, Fred. You know it's the right thing to do.

Cheer up, Fred. Remember the old saying, "Honesty is the best policy."

- With my income, I can't afford the best. - Come on, pal, forget it.

I'll play some music. Maybe that'll make you feel better.

And here's a special news bulletin. Just one hour ago...

a bag containing a sum of $36', 000 was stoien from the Rockviiie Nationai Bank...

by two masked bandits who are still at large.

$86,000? Barney, we got the stolen money in this car.

And now we know who it belongs to.

Although the police expect to apprehend the criminals shortly...

the bank has offered a reward for the return of the money.

Did you hear that, Fred? A reward!

I wonder how much we'll get. $10,000? $20,000?

We? My, aren't we plural lately.

I'm helping you return it to the bank, ain't I?

Putting a bag of money in the trunk of my car makes you a partner?

I'm out of gas. We'll have to stop at the next station.

We interrupt this program to bring you the latest news...

about the big bank robbery.

Police have thrown a dragnet around the entire city...

and expect to apprehend the two robbers by nightfall.

Fill her up, bud. Make it snappy. We're in a hurry.

Yes, sir.

And for the last time, Barney, I will not split any of the money.

Besides, how much could it be? There was only $86,000 in that bag.

Well, $86,000 ain't nothing to sneeze at, you know.

You call that a big bank robbery?

It's peanuts compared to some of the others.

Oh, my gosh, it's the bank robbers.

- How much, bud? - Nothing, sir. It's on the house.

- A sort of a get-acquainted offer. - Thanks, I'm pleased to meet you.

Operator, get me the police. Quick.

Turn the radio on. Let's see if the cops have any leads on the bank robbery.

Okay, Fred.

And here's the newsflash.

The two bank robbers were seen leaving a gas station a short while ago.

Hey, they spotted those crooks already.

One of the men is described as being a heavyset, vicious thug with dark hair...

and the other is short, shifty-eyed, and has light hair.

These men are described as being extremely dangerous...

and police have orders to shoot first and ask questions later.

Boy, I'd hate to meet those two characters in a dark alley.

They're believed heading in the general direction of Rockpeak's Park.

That's where we're going. Maybe we'll run into them.

I hope not.

And the license number of their car is XYZ 643.

- What's the matter, Fred? - That's my car.

Two guys leaving the gas station, dark hair, short, shifty-eyed...

Barney, they think we're the crooks.

My, ain't we getting plural all of a sudden.

- It's the cops. - So what, Fred? We're not the crooks.

Yeah, I know, but they don't. We got the stolen money in my car.

They're going to shoot first and ask questions later, remember?

We'll just tell them what happened.

Oh, sure. Who's going to believe I wished for the money...

- and it just dropped on my head? - You believed it, Fred.

Well, the cops won't. They'll lock me up for a nut.

The way I see it, Fred, you're in plenty of trouble.

I'm in plenty of trouble? You're in it, too. And you got to help me out of it.

I'll give you half the reward which should be about...

About 10 years. No, thanks, Fred.

Step on it, Fred. They're gaining on us.

Slow down, Fred. We're gaining on them.

- Head for the river, Fred. - The river? What for?

- They can't follow our tracks in the water. - That's a good idea.

It's the cops.

I thought you said they couldn't follow our tracks.

- Watch it, the light's going to change. - I think I can make it.

- Did we lose them? - Yeah, they didn't make the light.

Step on it!

And now for the 12:00 news roundup.

The men who robbed the Rockville Bank this morning...