Love the Coopers

Ah, the holidays. The most wonderful time of the year.

And so, begins my tale.

On the snowy morning of Christmas Eve,

as Charlotte Cooper set out her 37th snow globe,

trying to create the perfect Christmas for her family,

she remembered a moment, she'd hoped she could hold on to forever.

Meanwhile, her husband, Sam Cooper, who I can read pretty well,

was recalling the moment just after that moment...

trying to remember if he knew he was happy,

at the same time, the happiness was going on.

And, their beloved dog, Rag,

remembered how good it felt to be a Christmas present.

And all over town,

the Cooper clan, and then some, were starting their morning too.

Who are all these people?

Well, that's the story.

I can't just give it away.

But for now, they're heading into their holiday,

searching for comfort and a little more joy.

- That's fine. Make gingerbread houses. - All right.

Can you just have them at my front door at 9:00 am?

Yeah, but, it's Christmas morning. What if they want to sleep in?

What kid sleeps in on Christmas morning?

- I don't know. - Why do you have to change things?

God forbid, I wanna spend another 15 minutes with my kids.

Why'd you have to be such a dick?

- Merry Christmas. - Season's Greetings.

Merry Christmas.

We hope to see you tonight, Angie.

Hey, Charlie, Merry Christmas.

Don't take that personally.

Take it as a group, he hates everybody.

Hi, Grandma. Hi, Grandpa.

- Merry Christmas, Bo. - Merry Christmas.

Charlie, please don't ditch your brother at the mall.

Thank you for taking Madison today. I really appreciate it.

I can't be late for work.

But it's Christmas eve, Hank. Come on.

Yeah, I know.

Job's a job, right?

Madison's been doing this weird thing.

I made the mistake of laughing at it the first time.

So, now she does it all the time.

Do me a favor. When she does it, don't laugh.

And then, hopefully, she'll just stop doing it on her own.

- Sure. Of course. - What is it?

- Hi! - Hi, Madison.

There she is.

Grandma and Grandpa are here, they're going to take you for the day.

- Can you say, "Hi"? - You're such a dick.

- Dad, don't. - Stop it.

Okay, let's go.

As Ruby served her 19th Holiday Special,

she remembered serving Christmas dinner to her brothers.

While her mother, six eggnogs to the wind,

was passed out on the couch.

Although her childhood had left her feeling separate from the world,

Ruby felt an unexpected connection to Bucky Newport.

For the last five years, she looked forward to starting her mornings with him.

She loved how he wore a suit and bow tie, every day,

just like did when he was a teacher.

Always straightening it and only making it worse.

Good morning. I'm furious with you.

- What'd I do? - That ending shattered me.

Well, it's supposed to.

That's what makes it one of the most significant endings in the history of film.

But Chaplin's face...

Full of hope and fear and shame and embarrassment and God knows what else.

But the genius was that it's his subconscious autobiography.

He had fallen in love with several

young women over the years and he was their mentor.

But, he was endlessly terrified that

they're going see him as he saw himself.

Which is nothing but a busker, in the streets of London.

It's amazing.

Bucky looked away from Ruby, because,

oddly, he felt closer to her than anyone in his life.

He understood the absurdity of the situation.

He had shown her 67 movies. Ate at her diner, daily.

And hated the food there.

You want the special?

- What day is today? - Friday.

Friday? It's not so special.

How about Wednesday's?

Or Thursday's hash browns?

- Sold. - Hey, Ruby.

The coffee's cold.

You'll be fine.

Sit down.

Spending Christmas with the family?

Ruby recalled the joys of gift giving.

Nope.

Believe me, I understand.

Christmas comes around, somebody yells,

"Time for comfort and joy, it's Christmas."

Everybody panics as if you can schedule happiness.

Can't do it.

You going to your daughter's?

Oh, yes. She's a very good cook.

I don't know where she got it from, because

when their mother died, the only thing I could teach her was, how to order out.

I don't know what it is. Everything is a contest with my girls.

Except, I have no idea what the prize is.

I try to ease the tension, but they don't really hear me.

Hey, Ruby, my coffee's still cold.

Why don't you come over here and warm me up?

Sorry, I got to go.

Clearly, an emergency.

I just don't feel like spending any money on her.

She never spends a dime on me.

My own sister.

You know what she'll do. She'll make a donation in my name.

Oh, that's really festive.

And they never say how big a donation,

so there's no way of knowing how much I'm supposed to spend.

I am tempted to get the rattiest thing I can find,

just to see my sister Charlotte's face.

Hold on. I'll call you back.

When Emma was a little girl,

she overheard her parents say that her sister, Charlotte, was planned,

but, that she was an accident.

She faithfully behaved like one, ever since.

Ma'am, we need to detain you.

Give it, to me.

Come on. Let's just make life easier on everybody.

Spit it out.

Spit it out.

Give it, to me.

Merry Christmas.

- Thank you so much. Thank you. - Best ever.

- Thank you. - Our last number

is one of my aunt's favorites. So, this is for you.

Aunt Fishy.

Rags! Get down, Rags.

Okay, then. Ready, Mrs. Pinkins?

Hit it.

Joy to the world The Lord has come

Let earth...

That's not the right lyric.

I'm sorry, Mitzi. But I think it is.

From the top, please.

I'm not going to play to the wrong lyric.

Don't play it, Mitzi.

Mitzi's right.

- It's not the right lyric. - Of course, it's the lyric.

Joy to the world, the Lord has come.

No, it's not the Lord has come like God reached orgasm. Please...

What?

Mitzi!

Well, so, Merry Christmas, everyone.

I think that ends our little program.

Thank you so much. You've been a wonderful audience.

We will be back next year.

But, will they?

You don't have to worry about that after tonight, that's for sure.

You don't have to say it like you're never

going to see me again, Charlotte. I'm not dying.

No. But, we are.

Hey, Tinkerbell.

Aware of the growing distance between her parents,

Eleanor Cooper found herself drawn to public displays of affection.

She remembered a time in her life she had not been so guarded.

This is quite fun.

If you show me yours, I'll show you mine.

Okay?

She remembered a moment she'd wished she could forget,

the day a stolen kiss caught her eye.

She recognized that kiss.

It was her fiance's.

Eleanor was shattered.

Alas, she could never climb the wall that built up around her heart.

Still, Eleanor secretly searched out strangers' faces,

for the moment they flickered with unguarded emotion.

Can I have a Dirty Martini, shaken over ice, please?

I'd be honored to buy you a drink.

- I can pay for my drink. Thank you. - Not you.

Thanks.

I'll have a Dirty Martini, shaken over ice.

Put the presents for the kids in the trunk.

And I'll get your tip, next time.

No problem.

And take the Internet, it's faster.

You got it, Aunt Fishy.

My nephew called me that.

He and wife are going to Africa and I'm babysitting the kids.

I'm your nephew. Can you remember my name?

Sam.

Yes. I'm Sam, that's great.

I know your name.

I'm not a zombie.

You better step on it.

You're going to miss your plane.

Aunt Fishy, that was 30 years ago.

Really?

Well, how was the trip?

We didn't go.

But you were dying to go.

And, you and Charlotte, saved your money for years.

We had a rough year, so we postponed it.

Oh, Sammy. And then you never went.